STARSHIP VALIANT: LEGACY -NOW ONLINE

Discussion in 'Fan Productions' started by Phantassm, Jul 5, 2014.

  1. Phantassm

    Phantassm Vice Admiral Admiral

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  2. USS Intrepid

    USS Intrepid Commodore Commodore

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    Just watched it. Well done to all on a fine first episode. :)
     
  3. DCR

    DCR Commander Red Shirt

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    Congratulations! I just watched and enjoyed it.

    I do have a few things I'd like to point out, but I'll save them for later and just reiterate that it was a very good first effort.

    Big kudos to Starship Valiant and Starbase Studios.
     
  4. Barbreader

    Barbreader Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    I thought the acting was two step above most Fan Trek. Really enjoyed it.
     
  5. Sir Rhosis

    Sir Rhosis Commodore Commodore

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    Well done, indeed. Congratulations Michael and crew. Look forward to more.

    Sir Rhosis
     
  6. Borgminister

    Borgminister Admiral Moderator

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    Very well done!

    Observations:

    - I thought the camera lingered just a bit too long on the captain in the pensive scenes,

    - Nice acting by all, with special mention of the first office at the end, who might make a good Vulcan... very regal and photogenic.

    - Leading man, and I say this as an overweight American, the high quality of this effort must be accompanied by a bit of weight loss for the overall effect to sustain itself going forward.
     
  7. Phantassm

    Phantassm Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Thank you for the critique and yes, I could stand to lose a few pounds and worked really hard to take off the weight during the production. I am now even smaller than I was at the time we filmed. By the time we film the second episode, I'll be in top form. Thank you so much for watching and the kind words. We appreciate all our fellow trek fans.
     
  8. DCR

    DCR Commander Red Shirt

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    Okay, to add a little more, and please take this as constructive.

    When Jackson was walking around the bridge, I noticed a wire coming from his back pocket, perhaps for a microphone. It's just something to be aware of in future.

    I liked the story, but I think the script could have used more work. I thought the dialogue was overwritten. It's something I've seen in a number of other fan films, and many of them took it much further, but I wanted to point it out.

    I don't know how else to put it, but there were places where the dialogue sounded more like written English spoken aloud than spoken English, if you follow the distinction. I'd also approach the dialogue for the next script by looking for every word that could be taken out, particularly anything in the way of repetition or reinforcement.

    Really enjoyed it, and I'm looking forward to the next one.
     
  9. Phantassm

    Phantassm Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Thank you for your comments DCR. No offense taken and as a matter a fact thoroughly appreciated. I was very much aware that the mic wire was showing but I thought that it was going to be taken out in post but it didn't happen. The entire film was a learning experience for us and we definitely will strive to make our film better in the next episode. Thank you so much for watching.
     
  10. FatherRob

    FatherRob Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Thanks for bringing us another starship and crew in the TOS era... I'll be eagerly awaiting your next episode.

    Positives:
    The first officer was far and away the highlight of the episode.
    The admiral did a great job.
    I like the general storyline about how Jackson came to command.

    General observation:
    I felt that after all he had just experienced with his daughter, Jackson should have at least said something to the Admiral about the situation. It didn't have to make a difference, but the lack of discussing his daughter was strange.

    Improvements
    I noticed the zipper dangling from Jackson's uniform.
    Ensign Torres dress looked very bunched up
    Some of the acting was wooden and stilted...
    I noticed a black shirt sticking out from behind Jackson's black collar. Looked odd.

    Great first outing!

    Rob+
     
  11. Phantassm

    Phantassm Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Thanks for the comments FR. Appreciate you watching.
     
  12. RCAM

    RCAM Commander Red Shirt

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    I definitely enjoyed this. Very solid production values for a fan film. I also thought there was something unique about seeing the bridge darkened and empty. There was a sort of eerie quiet in that scene that was cool.

    My only criticisms somewhat echo a couple other's people's: I found the daughter very unconvincing (it seems like maybe she doesn't have a background in acting, since she knew to raise her voice but sounded like was reading off a cue card instead of speaking spontaneously like we do in real life); and I thought a few scenes lingered too long on the lead character's despondent expression (hammering it home instead of being subtle).

    This is very promising, and I look forward to more. It was a most pleasant way to spend 20 minutes this afternoon.

    One question: is this meant to take place close to "The Motion Picture?" I ask in light of the closing credits playing over Goldsmith's iconic score.
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2014
  13. Orion Pimp

    Orion Pimp Captain Captain

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    I liked it. The best compliment I can give is it made me want to see more. Nice job! I already feel comfortable with these characters and am looking forward to your next film.
     
  14. Potemkin_Prod

    Potemkin_Prod Commodore Commodore

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    Very enjoyable, Michael! Looking forward to much more!
     
  15. Duane

    Duane Captain Captain

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    I don't have much to add to the other comments made here, but I do agree with Father Rob the the First Officer's performance was outstanding. I'm guessing the actor has a lot of experience?
     
  16. Avon

    Avon Commodore Commodore

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    i really liked that.

    its nice to see some tos-era stuff that isn't trying to exactly duplicate that original series feel.
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2014
  17. CaptainSerek

    CaptainSerek Commander Red Shirt

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    I watched it yesterday. I enjoyed it. I look forward to a full episode to see how it plays.
     
  18. Kelso

    Kelso Vice Admiral Admiral

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    I enjoyed it and I'm looking forward to future installments.


    Then you should check out every TOS-era fan film other than STC. ;)
     
  19. Avon

    Avon Commodore Commodore

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    well of what i've watched most recently, i think continues, p2 and exeter all had that feel to various extents. not that i'm saying theres anything wrong with it. exeter was particularly excellent. this just felt a bit more modern and downbeat, which i like.
     
  20. Phantassm

    Phantassm Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Duane,
    the first officer was played by Michael L. King and no, he had never acted in anything before this. Fresh out of the drydock. What he wanted to do with the character and what he felt had been missing from many characters in trek fan films was the humanization of the people. He wanted to develop Jackson and make him as real as possible. What we did have was a brilliant acting coach named Ben Richardson who worked hard to help and assist us in playing the roles. The most important thing in the story was for us to make the people as real as possible and that was the focal point of this film. Thank you for watching and we appreciate your comments.