Star Trek Rules

Rule 37

At the next possible moment, a hairstylist must be within an arm's reach of any major female character, especially in combat or hazardous situations.

 

38. When ever Worf accompanies Picard on an away mission, the Captain will be captured.

 

39. Given enough preparation, Batman always wins, even if pitted against Kirk, Picard, or Q.

 

Rule 40. Any ship named "Enterprise", regardless of captain or crew, will always end up in the most absurd and extreme situations known to Starfleet.

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Rule 41:
The starship Enterprise is always the only ship in the quadrant. As in the Alpha Quadrant? Where the hell did everybody go?

 

Rule 42. If you attain the rank of Admiral, you will immediately become an asshole.

 

Rule 43. During hostile or dangerous situations, always ignore the advice of your Chief of Security

 

Rule 44: All starship control panels contain fireworks. And will explode with the slightest provacation.

 

Rule 47 The number 47 shows up 47 a lot 47 more often 47 than it 47 statistically should 47.