Star Trek Rules

Discussion in 'General Trek Discussion' started by Dfros, Jul 9, 2012.

  1. Dfros

    Dfros Ensign Newbie

    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2012
    Rule 1.

    If Riker is talking to you he must put his foot up on the nearest desk.


    Rule 2

    Any Scientists working in isolation will have gone rouge in some way.


    Rule 3

    If something goes wrong on the enterprise get to a service tube and climb up the ladder it usually helps.
     
  2. tighr

    tighr Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2011
    Location:
    California
    Rule 4

    Tachyon beams can serve as the resolution to any plot requirement. If for some reason a tachyon beam cannot resolve a situation, try an inverse tachyon beam.
     
  3. Dfros

    Dfros Ensign Newbie

    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2012
    Rule 5

    A Tricorder is not just a Tricorder its just about anything you need it to be at the time just reprogram it and your sorted
     
  4. Avon

    Avon Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    May 7, 2010
    Location:
    Avon
    Rule 46

    Rule 45 causes a temporal paradox. it'll make sense when you get there.
     
  5. Ríu ríu chíu

    Ríu ríu chíu Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 10, 2005
    Location:
    Mr. Laser Beam is in the visitor's bullpen
    Especially if one of them is Eddie Izzard...
     
  6. Avon

    Avon Commodore Commodore

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    May 7, 2010
    Location:
    Avon
    should've picked a lower number in case this thread doesn't last that long
     
  7. Ríu ríu chíu

    Ríu ríu chíu Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 10, 2005
    Location:
    Mr. Laser Beam is in the visitor's bullpen
    Rule 6: There is no Rule 6.

    Rule 7: No Borg pooftahs.
     
  8. Happy Xmas (War Is Over)

    Happy Xmas (War Is Over) Fleet Admiral Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    If you want it
    Rule 8. Do not fall in love with James Kirk.
     
  9. captcalhoun

    captcalhoun Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2005
    Location:
    everywhere
    Rule 9: Sisko's NOT PICARD.
     
  10. tighr

    tighr Commodore Commodore

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    Sep 5, 2011
    Location:
    California
    Picard never hit Q.
     
  11. Bry_Sinclair

    Bry_Sinclair Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2009
    Location:
    The glorious Shetland Isles!
    Maybe he should have. Q never bothered Sisko again :)
     
  12. Bry_Sinclair

    Bry_Sinclair Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2009
    Location:
    The glorious Shetland Isles!
    Rule 10: Any well-endowed woman must be in either a low-cut or skin-tight catsuit, regardless of rank or position.
     
  13. T'Cal

    T'Cal Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2003
    Location:
    Chicago
    Rule 11: When faced with a life-threatening conundrum and your normal solution isn't working, flip it around! That's what Geordi always does and it always works.
     
  14. Relayer1

    Relayer1 Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2011
    Location:
    The Black Country, England
    Rule 12

    NOTHING fired at the ship will bounce harmlessly off the shields.
     
  15. The Wormhole

    The Wormhole Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2001
    Rule 13
    Warp core ejection systems must fail during an emergency, unless the ejection of warp core is Relevant to the Plot.
     
  16. Mr Silver

    Mr Silver Commodore Newbie

    Joined:
    Jun 1, 2010
    Location:
    UK
    Rule 14: ANY critical failure can be re-routed away.

    Rule 15: A ship named Enterprise will be at the forefront of most major discoveries, battles and other events in the reach of the Federation and beyond.
     
  17. tighr

    tighr Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2011
    Location:
    California
    Except lasers.
     
  18. Marlonius

    Marlonius Lieutenant Junior Grade Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Mar 18, 2012
    Rule 16: Drugs that cure plagues are best stored at isolated locations, very far from any location at which a plague might erupt.

    Rule 17: Geordi must be forever lonely.
     
  19. Ríu ríu chíu

    Ríu ríu chíu Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 10, 2005
    Location:
    Mr. Laser Beam is in the visitor's bullpen
    Rule 18: Torture..
    18a (ENT): Malcolm
    18b (TOS): Chekov
    18c (TNG): Geordi
    18d (DS9): O'Brien
    18e (VOY): Harry
     
  20. Dfros

    Dfros Ensign Newbie

    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2012
    Rule 19

    If Wesley Crusher is doing or has done some experiment its probably responsible for the crazy stuff going on around you