Phase II begins re-filming "Mind Sifter"

Discussion in 'Fan Productions' started by PattyW, Jun 23, 2014.

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  1. Jay

    Jay Lieutenant Red Shirt

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    Since you gave the title, I found it!

    http://www.rakuten.com/prod/chico-a...I8dFHNGBTQtiFnN_A47ZZQbT_248-Ob4yAL0V5C_D_BwE

    You can actually see a clip of the episode here:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HsgDCdvJIfM

    I had no idea you were only 14 when you wrote this. It's really great dialog. It's a crime that they didn't give you some credit especially since they didn't change a word! What unethical people!
     
  2. PattyW

    PattyW Commander Red Shirt

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    I can answer that question to begin with. (Also, Gerrold told me that that Rick and David Reddish didn't even read the fanzine story so they actually only "wrote a script based on a book". They didn't consider the original fanzine story at all.). I find it easy - and more of a "school assignment" than just writing out of pure creativity. The first thing I did was to write the teaser - because that sets up the entire tone of the episode. Then I broke up the original story into "scenes" as if they were a script.

    Then comes the "work".... figuring out how to arrange them to tell the story in a "TOS style", how to keep the audience engaged, and deciding what the story is that the original author is trying to tell. After that I work on "flushing out" the original story and deciding if anything should be added to make it compelling. (sometimes this is a b or c storyline, or adding details to the original.)

    This is the step where the "differences" would come in. Whatever "flushing out" or actual new material is added makes the differences. For instance, one of my "flushing out" came from discussions with Shirley back when she published the original. The idea that Chekov was beaming down into heavily McCarthy-era-red-scare-America never occurred to her. (she issued a four letter word when I pointed it out). So when I wrote it this idea figured into it.

    Part of the equation is deciding what to see and what not to see. A "story" focuses on TELLING you a story, while a film SHOWS you the story. One of the changes I made was to show Kirk getting tortured.

    All of the above, especially choices, leads to both similarities and differences. For instance, it's unlikely that another writer would add the "Red Scare" issues I did (partly for Shirley and partly to honor Walter Koenig), or the other nods to Koenig I put in (because it was a "Chekov story"), but it's altogether possible that another writer would have chosen to show Kirk getting tortured or added the realities of the 1950s institutions that I knew from my LICSW background (and which I added partly to honor John Carrigan's father). Two writers can very well come up with ideas that similar. The "execution" of the idea is what makes it different.

    Does that start to explain it?

    Just another added note...since Rick, David and David based their script on the original story, Chekov probably doesn't even appear in the episode, rather than being one of the primary characters.
     
  3. Duane

    Duane Captain Captain

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    Thanks for the youtube link to Chico's Padre. At the 1:24 mark it sounds like Cesar Romero is trying to do a James Doohan "Scotty" impersonation.
     
  4. Maurice

    Maurice Vice Admiral Admiral

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    The episode in question is on IMDB here (link).

    The "Story By" credit for it is by a writer (link) with nine "Chico" credits to his name.

    If this happened as Patty said it would have been a pretty big violation of standard business practices and the terms under which studios worked with the WGA west. If so, the big question is "why"? Why not just pay for the script like they would for any other assignment? Why risk a potential lawsuit? Curiouser and curiouser.
     
  5. CorporalCaptain

    CorporalCaptain Admiral Admiral

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    Is it "flushing out" or "fleshing out" (in that context)?
     
  6. PattyW

    PattyW Commander Red Shirt

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    "Chico", like many shows at the time, had a "writing team" and almost all the episodes were written by some combination of them.

    Komack's lack of ethics was one of the things people talked about. However, it was kinda the age of this kind of thing happening. Embarrassingly, the only reason it occurred to me that things were not handled "correctly" was that right afterward the Osmond Brothers were sued by another teenager that had sent a few songs to them which they allegededly recorded with no credit or even word to the kid. Komack's "thanks!" note and cash left absolutely no trail I could use to sue the show. (this kind of thing is part of why Phase II says no one can post any story ideas on their forum or send them in without a written agreement. It's very easy for someone to believe their suggestion got used when it wasn't even read.) Komack could not have used my script acknowledging it was written by me, because I was not a WGA member. Clearly, I was also cheaper than a WGA member.

    I began writing very young. I actually won "America's Best Young Poets" when I was 11. (don't remember how many were named.)

    Not sure how this thread go so derailed....sorry folks.

    Back to Phase II.... they continue to post more and more photos. The guardian of forever is there. The latest I saw was a few photos of Kirk without his shirt on. (one of the reasons I wanted to change my Mindsifter script...LOL.. to take Kirk's shirt off and put him in boxers. Glad they got half of it done!) :drool:
     
  7. Kelso

    Kelso Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Mr. Cawley has also posted a photo of the new Dr. McCoy!
     
  8. Shane Houston

    Shane Houston Commander Red Shirt

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    Yes, that does it explain it. Thanks to you both for answering.

    Have you ever thought of writing a tale dealing with Checkov and the Red Scare separate from Mind Sifter? I'd turn in or read a tale like that.
     
  9. Maurice

    Maurice Vice Admiral Admiral

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    If so, it must have happened in the past decade because Chico and the Man was aired on TV Land and a few other cable channels early in the previous decade (incidentally, in case anyone mistakes the random example of Bosom Buddies as a show whose tapes were lost in this fashion, it wasn't, as much as Tom Hanks might want it to heh heh).
     
  10. Indysolo

    Indysolo Commodore Commodore

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    And it's my good friend and colleague, Jeff Bond!
     
  11. Bixby

    Bixby Captain Captain

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    Interesting, I actually know who two of these writers are since as a kid, for good or ill, I devoured a lot of television including 70s and 80s sci-fi, cartoons and well known comedies. It's sometimes amazing how prolific writers from 40 years were as opposed to today, where one can write for Welcome back, Kotter, the Incredible Hulk and My Little Pony during one's career...
     
  12. doubleohfive

    doubleohfive Fleet Admiral

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    One more reason to watch!

    Between Jeff and Larry, we're now friends with TWO Dr. McCoys! :lol: :techman:

    I don't know that it's all that out of the ordinary. While there are clearly delineated lines between comedy and drama writing/writers in Hollywood today, plenty of writers today do nevertheless cross genre and style. How successful they are is another story. Kevin Williamson comes to mind, among others.
     
  13. PattyW

    PattyW Commander Red Shirt

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    Nope, not randomly chosen by me. I have a very good memory for details like this and the guy at Paramount specifically said "Bosom Buddies" as his example of shows where most of the episodes were lost. I can't say he wasn't just pulling a name out of the hat without knowing the facts, but that's the show he used as an example. I think it's so clear in my mind because the information made me sad. That show was priceless.
     
  14. Maurice

    Maurice Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Then he was mistaken or they found them, because all of Bosom Buddies is on DVD (link).
     
  15. Jay

    Jay Lieutenant Red Shirt

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    I don't think Chico was lost either because TVLand showed them a while ago.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bXPQKAL-pP4

    That means Ms. Wright's episode was on the Best Of DVD because it was one of the best!

    It is a shame they didn't give her credit. Maybe if they rewrote it in some way I can see them taking credit, but how could a writer use every line, word for word, and then not feel like they had to give the actual writer credit? It's just wrong!
     
  16. Maurice

    Maurice Vice Admiral Admiral

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    I mentioned the TV Land airings upthread. That appears to have been around 2000, not recently.
     
  17. Bixby

    Bixby Captain Captain

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    Since my tv watching has been very limited over the last 10 years, I guess I wouldn't really be that aware of modern cross-genre specialists unless they were often mentioned in news articles. You're right about Kevin Williamson, though I just know him from Scream and Dawson's Creak. There's J. Michael Straczynsky who has done comics, Babylon 5, He-Man and Ghostbusters cartoons, but especially for Clint Eastwood's Changeling film.

    But guys as varied as Straczynsky seem a dying breed, as other writers seem to stick to their genres and styles. You wouldn't expect Shane Black to tackle a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles episode, or Tarantino to write for Hannah Montana...
     
    Last edited: Jun 30, 2014
  18. Potemkin_Prod

    Potemkin_Prod Commodore Commodore

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    Morgan Gendel is another writer whose name I look for, even though he's moving into producing. In addition to TNG and DS9, he wrote for a number of shows I've watched including: Nash Bridges, Law & Order, Wiseguy, 21 Jump Street, and Drop Dead Diva.
     
  19. ClayinCA

    ClayinCA Commodore Commodore

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    I would literally pay money to watch Quentin Tarantino's Hannah Montana.
     
  20. Maurice

    Maurice Vice Admiral Admiral

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    One final "Chico's Padre" note. IMDB lists the following as the writing credits:
    Ron Friedman ... (story)
    Ron Friedman ... (teleplay)
    George Arthur Bloom ... (teleplay)
    Henry Irving ... (teleplay)
    I looked up Ron Friedman. He's an Emmy-nominated writer with 69 credits to his name (link), including Written by credits for Get Smart, I Dream of Jeannie, All In the Family, etc.
     
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