Movie Caption Contest #233: Down the hatch!

Discussion in 'Star Trek Movies I-X' started by LeadHead, Mar 17, 2013.

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  1. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

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    Hello everyone, sorry I wasn't able to get this one started any earlier, Photobucket was being quite weird last weekend and I can't start a new contest without new images.


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    First up to the plate, we have the "Bad idea" Award, going to:

    Next, we have the "Dangerous, according to Stephen Colbert" Award, going to:

    Next, we have the "Just wait til the J.J.verse" Award, going to:

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    Congratulations to all of our winners! Many thanks to everyone who participated!

    Lets get going on our new contest!

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    Enjoy!
     
  2. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

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    Kirk: Okay, so I can see the new uniforms have not proven popular. Next time we won't choose them from our Spacebook Comments section.

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    Kirk: I used to have a drinking problem.

    Sulu: And?

    Kirk: Now I don't miss.

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    Spock: You made that mess, Chekov. Now clean it up.
     
  3. inflatabledalek

    inflatabledalek Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
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    William Shatner: I'd like to thank all the fans who support the ides of a director's cut of Star Trek V for turning up today. It'd be more impressive if enough of you had turned up to stop us being moved down from the Big Room of the convention, but it's still appreciated.

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    It may have taken twenty years of working together before he noticed, but as as soon as Shatner discovered Takei was gay, he reacted with typical tact.

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    Spock: It's no good, I think we'll have to stick with DVD. On Blu Ray the Captain's hair just looks... odd.
     
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2013
  4. shivkala

    shivkala Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Kirk: And, on a last note, I'd like to report that Starfleet's recent initiative to eliminate primary colors has been successful. On an unrelated note, we are already seeing an increase in moral among the security teams, though unfortunately, it has not increased their mortality rate at all.

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    Sulu: Let me show you how this is done. First thing, hold the glass up and examine the wine against the light. You're looking for color and clarity. Just, get a sense of it. OK? Uhh, thick? Thin? Watery? Syrupy? OK? Alright. Now, tip it. What you're doing here is checking for color density as it thins out towards the rim. Uhh, that's gonna tell you how old it is, among other things. It's usually more important with reds. OK? Now, stick your nose in it. Don't be shy, really get your nose in there. Mmm... a little citrus... maybe some strawberry...passion fruit...
    ... and, oh, there's just like the faintest soup├žon of like asparagus and just a flutter of a, like a, nutty Edam cheese..

    *turns to see Kirk chugging the wine*

    That's it, that's the last wine tasting I invite him to!

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    Spock: For that last time, Commander, no one wants to see "Little Pavel" while we're waiting for Lt. Dax. Now put him away...
     
  5. Maurice

    Maurice Vice Admiral Admiral

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    KIRK: So, this is where the other 400 of you have been hiding all these years!


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    KIRK: Bottoms up!
    SULU: You heard him, Chekov, bend over.
    CHEKOV: You svore you vouldn't tell...oh, vhat a giveavay!
     
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2013
  6. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    KIRK: Where's Waldo?
     
  7. The Laughing Vulcan

    The Laughing Vulcan Admiral Admiral

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    At The Laughing Vulcan's party...
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    Kirk: "Okay... this is embarrassing. Just to save time, I've called you all here... Look. If you have been experiencing an itching, burning sensation in... certain regions. And even if you haven't... It's best if you go see Dr McCoy. Just give him half an hour to check himself out first... Dismissed."

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    Uhura: "If he does that thing he always does with his tongue, to 'impress' the ladies... I'm leaving."
    Chekov. "Me too."
    Sulu: "I don't know..."

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    Spock: "You're... Ensign Dax?"
    Uhura: "Trill symbionts sure aren't picky about their hosts... Yeesh!"
     
  8. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Sady, it wasn't the first time Scotty forgot his pants.
     
  9. golddragon71

    golddragon71 Lieutenant Commander Red Shirt

    Joined:
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    Kirk: I've just been informed that Starfleet has redesigned the uniforms and our current uniforms will be switched out once we reach Earth

    Crew: YAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!!!!!

    Kirk: I've also been informed that there is an alternate timeline in which my uniform becomes the standard for Starfleet admirals.

    Crew:...............................................................

    Kirk: Yeah that was pretty much my reaction.



    dismissed.

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    Sulu: That's an interesting Shirt Admiral. Where'd you get it?
    Kirk: I saw something similar once when i was time-lost in the 25th century [​IMG]

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    Most of the crew were interested in watching the Trial involving Captain Kirk and Doctor McCoy but for some reason the Enterprise's Comm-screens got stuck on a video feed taken from Space station K-7 when Uhura and Chekov were on shore-leave together
     
  10. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    KIRK: Finally, due to various complaints, all male crewmembers will be required to wear a underwear.
     
  11. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Kirk: Where the fuck is Scotty?


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    Kirk: Sulu, your liqueur tastes like...Robitussin.

    <Sulu hides Robitussin bottle while he and Uhura exchange eye rolls and sip their two hundred year old Louis XIII Black Pearl Cognac>

    Sulu:
    Why yes, you're right, Captain. There's Michelob in the fridge.


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    Spock: You can't wear Star Trek boxer shorts, Mister Scott. It is a canon violation.
     
  12. Mysterion

    Mysterion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    "Now remember, only ten of you from this audition will go on to Hollywood so..."
     
  13. CorporalCaptain

    CorporalCaptain Admiral Admiral

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    "Who are you?"
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    Kirk: As you know, most of you won't be returning from this mission. So, I've called this meeting to boost morale.


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    Sulu: Admiral, what's going to happen to the Enterprise?

    Kirk: *chugs another*


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    Spock: Mister Chekov, perhaps you should leave the fan dancing to Commander Uhura.
     
  14. Finn

    Finn Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Finn
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    Spock: It wasn't me. I was in the pool with her *points*
     
  15. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    You are all new to the Enterprise, so you may not know what to expect. When Mister Spock gets here everybody just ignore his haircut so we can move on.


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    Chekov: You look like an alcoholic Power Ranger, Keptin.


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    Spock: Chirpy! Return!
    Uhura: What kind of motherflogger trains a parakeet to crack a motherflogging combination lock??
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2013
  16. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    KIRK: Was the crew this big on the old ship?

    UHURA: Yes.

    KIRK: Really? Because, I only remember seeing about twenty people, tops.
     
  17. CorporalCaptain

    CorporalCaptain Admiral Admiral

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    Kirk: As you know, we're trapped in uncharted space, and ship's life support can keep all 430 of us alive for only one more day. Suggestions?
     
  18. Finn

    Finn Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Finn
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    Shatner: so...who are you guys again?
     
  19. CorporalCaptain

    CorporalCaptain Admiral Admiral

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    Kirk: Ah, that's warm.

    Sulu: Admiral, I think we were supposed to give these to Doctor McCoy.
     
  20. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Uhura: No Mister Spock, nobody wants you to "Clarence Thomas" their drink.


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    Uhura: Looks like I owe Mister Spock an apology.
     
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