Let me get this straight: Hogan

Discussion in 'Star Trek: Voyager' started by Kup1986, Oct 2, 2012.

  1. Guy Gardener

    Guy Gardener Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Some kids try to hold their breath because they're afraid of making bubbles and then start to panic when it seems that they might get the bends.
     
  2. Fruitcake

    Fruitcake Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    They need didgeridoo training.
     
  3. Guy Gardener

    Guy Gardener Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Which reminds me of a joke from Rowan Atkinson... 'I don't know much about sex, but i do know this... You don't blow."
     
  4. spot_loves_data

    spot_loves_data Captain Captain

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    ^Damn, I've been doing it wrong all this time.
     
  5. Guy Gardener

    Guy Gardener Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Have any of your lovers every floated away?
     
  6. Fruitcake

    Fruitcake Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    What I've always wondered is what that humming term refers to.

    I mean really? Actual humming?

    Okay and Hogan, he's DEAD. Eaten. If he hadn't figured this stuff out before that it's too late.
     
  7. Guy Gardener

    Guy Gardener Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    So the big giant snake has talked her lover into felching her a little, and afterwards accordingly the snakes lover has to clean smeared hogan, ear to ear, off her face big face.
     
  8. spot_loves_data

    spot_loves_data Captain Captain

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    Mine? Only when I didn't have time to properly weigh them down before I heaved them overboard. :rommie:
     
  9. Guy Gardener

    Guy Gardener Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    I was more thinking of human dirigibles than human submersibles who have their own place in the world.

    I'm not racist.
     
  10. spot_loves_data

    spot_loves_data Captain Captain

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    Ah, a Harry Potter/Aunt Marge situation.

    What about that episode in TNG where everyone devolves? You'd think that one of the aggressive carnivores would eat a more docile mutated crew member.
     
  11. Fruitcake

    Fruitcake Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Am I going to have to post my favorite pic again?

    [​IMG]

    See I always said he was aggressive.. who should he eat I wonder. The spider?
     
  12. Guy Gardener

    Guy Gardener Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    You can't use the word "eating", "eat" or "ate" in this thread after I've made such a mess out of it already, because I'm only going to make things worse if you're chucking more wood on the fire.

    Blowholingus.

    No matter how much he protested that he didn't love the girl turning into a dolphin, Caveman Will should have thumped that Klingon idiot and laid down the foundations for his once and future relationship with Dee.

    So you're thinking what I'm thinking?

    Has millions of years of evolution sealed up the counsellors blowhole, or did she spend 7 years wandering about on television with a fourth hole that... Maybe that explains the massive wigs with the caged birds in them from Betazoidian history?

    A type of chastity belt.

    Attack birds to defend young girls blowholes and honour in polite society.

    Yes.

    That makes perfect sense.
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2012
  13. Brit

    Brit Captain Captain

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    Of course, it wasn't enough that Hogan was eaten, then a Voth scientist dug up his bones in "Distant Origin". Poor Hogan.
     
  14. Fruitcake

    Fruitcake Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    And Janeway did not even ask for Hogan's remains to be returned to them. Of course all they would have done is jettison them into space interred in a capsule but someone could have played the tin whistle.
     
  15. Guy Gardener

    Guy Gardener Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Hitler insisted that his chauffeur mutilate and burn his body after his suiside because he didn't not want to be stuffed and mounted as an exhibit in the foyer to the Kremlin for the next 2000 years.

    Although since any proof of Hogan's existence is heresy against doctrine, the Voth are going to stick his remains some place like where Roosevelt put the Ark of the covenant.

    After Lyndsay Ballard however, you'd have to wonder if Janeway wasn't firing torpedoes at any such place sh e was leaving crew behind Predator style.
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2012
  16. Fruitcake

    Fruitcake Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    I like the Ferengi approach to remains.

    The Voth would have thrown Hogan's remains out the airlock like the Lutherans chucked the forest of true cross splinters into the Rhine. Recovery of remains seems to be of low priority in starfleet, which is fair enough if you need to use energy storing them but they could reduce a person to a bauble and just file him for his relatives.

    And do they explain to Hogan's loved ones what happened to his bones? A dinosaur ate him and then sentient dinosaurs collected him and then they threw him away.

    It's kind of odd that people who (frequently) believe in an afterlife in this century get all worked up about recovery of remains of loved ones but in the future when many seem to have little religious belief no one cares.
     
  17. Guy Gardener

    Guy Gardener Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Well, he was Maquis.

    It's more than likely that all his loved ones had been exterminated by the Dominion.

    You know how I keep saying that hogan and Janeway should have been fucking?

    Get this.

    He started as a Maquis terrorist, made it to enlisted crewman as a given and then promoted to Ensign because he's not a fuck up, AND THEN Lieutenant in just over a year... Either this kid was EXCEPTIONAL... Or he was sleeping with Janeway.

    :)

    Wardrobe screwed up.

    I don't care.

    Canon is canon.
     
  18. Fruitcake

    Fruitcake Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    So all oddly fast rises through rank point to the ready room couch?

    You're just saying this so there's no way ever that Harry/Janeway could exist.
     
  19. Guy Gardener

    Guy Gardener Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    For "oddly" fast rises, yes.

    Well.

    It's either sex, blackmail, or nepotism.

    Hard work is for suckers.
     
  20. Fruitcake

    Fruitcake Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Some people would say sex with Janeway IS hard work.

    Of course these people are wrong, so very wrong..