Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Women

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by Gaith, Feb 18, 2011.

  1. Gaith

    Gaith Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Hola Everyone,

    Well... I don't really know of a clever way to present this, so I'll cut to the chase: I've written a guide for how to date modern women. It's called "The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Women", and yes, the tone and prose is an extended stylistic homage to Douglas Adams, because a) I thought that'd be a funny approach to such a banal subject and b) I probably wouldn't have written it otherwise.

    This guide represents all the really important stuff I've learned about dating in the past two years or so, and while I'm no expert on the subject - seriously, my track record is pretty pathetic - I do think/hope that some people might find it helpful. I know I certainly wish that I'd had this pamphlet (as I refer to it) back during my college years. It might not have made much difference at all, but then again, it just might have changed all sorts of things. Either way, it's based on knowledge and experience I wouldn't give up for anything, and now that I've written it, I figure I might as well release it.

    While I go into a fair bit of detail on many dating-related subjects, from asking a girl out to sex, here's a preview of sorts:

    These three steps are (explanation and commentary presented in the pamphlet itself):


    The HGTD21CW is available entirely free of charge, in both regular-page and e-reader-friendly (specifically, designed-for-Kindle) pdfs. Maybe I totally wasted my time writing it, maybe a few people will enjoy it, or maybe it'll catch like wildfire and burn the Internet down. Okay, probably not the latter. But you guys are the first to hear of it!

    So-o, there it is. Uh... enjoy? :)
     
  2. BolianAuthor

    BolianAuthor Writer, Battlestar Urantia Rear Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    I shall read it.

    EDIT: I'm reading it.

    And since nobody replied about it in my thread, I'll say that I've decided to go back to that store and talk to that girl I saw today, and attempt to ask if she'd like to have coffee or something... because I'd rather risk making a fool of myself and being rejected, than not try and not know.
     
  3. BolianAuthor

    BolianAuthor Writer, Battlestar Urantia Rear Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    Read it... that was pretty good! :)
     
  4. An Officer

    An Officer Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    Apart from the whole casual sex fixation thing, you sound like you know what you're doing. I enjoyed reading it, you have a lot of interesting approaches, and a very fun turn of phrase!
     
  5. jeskawest

    jeskawest Ensign Red Shirt

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    Overall I like it, although I think you should change the title to The Hitchhiker's Guide to Getting Laid. That seems to be the ultimate goal, so why not be honest about it? "Dating" is a whole other issue, if it is to continue after the "getting laid" step has been reached.
     
  6. teacake

    teacake Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    I would never date a man who hated the prequels, much less have casual sex with him.

    "Always remember, your focus determines your reality."
     
  7. Gaith

    Gaith Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    @ BA: Thanks! :)


    Thanks again! I'm both amused and intrigued, though, by this "whole casual sex fixation thing", as I consider myself to be relatively uninvested in emotion-free bonking. That said, I am generally in favor of it when the circumstances are right (i.e., it just happens, and isn't something you're fixated on or go out with the specific intention of finding), and I do think that trying some can be very helpful in learning to be comfortable with your own sexuality. For example, I went on three dates last summer with a wonderful woman who I was emotionally attracted to. She found me cute, but for both personal and practical reasons was resistant to the idea of giving me an even chance, and we never got past the kissing stage. If not for the unapologetically sexual way I courted her, however, we wouldn't even have gotten that far; I wouldn't have had what chances I did to demonstrate my emotional interest, and we probably wouldn't have had the fun second two dates.

    So, while I don't say that everyone should give casual sex a try, I do say don't knock it until you've tried it. (Not speaking to anyone in particular here, just rambling.) :techman:

    Anyway, keep the comments/thoughts coming! :)
     
  8. Gaith

    Gaith Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    I think you're describing what's increasingly becoming a distinction without a difference. According to one recent study cited in Science Daily, "couples who became sexually involved as friends or acquaintances and were open to a serious relationship ended up just as happy as those who dated and waited." So, it really boils down to this: if you date someone with the hope of starting a relationship, you hope for eventual sex with that person. Since sex outside of relationships has become de rigueur, would you rather wait and risk no sex at all if nothing develops, or jump right in and get some action before finding that nothing will develop? YMMV, but I tend to err on the latter side.

    I guess I could well have written material on how to date after the first sex, but a) I doubt that there'd be much to say apart from "repeat prior dating sequences" (if it ain't broke...) and b) my practical experience in that stage is, alas, about nil.:shrug:

    Still, interesting suggestion re: the title; I shall think on it.


    :lol: ... And I don't "hate" the prequels; I just think I should expect from more movies than "well, I didn't hate it" if I'm to accept them as full-fledged entries in the venerable Star Wars saga. ;)

    And you do realize that your own grammar holds that you have more restrictive standards for casual sex partners than for dating partners, right? :p
     
  9. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    Yeah, yeah, well, good for them. :rolleyes: I still prefer to date and wait. Obsolete though that may be.

    See above.

    I'm not knocking it. Just saying it isn't for me. Nothing wrong with that, is there? Or are we not as diverse as we claim to be?
     
  10. Kestra

    Kestra Vice Admiral Premium Member

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    Dude, stop overreacting. Gaith has his idea of what works and he never said you couldn't do what you wanted. He specifically said that not everyone needs to try it! Goodness.
     
  11. Gaith

    Gaith Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    Kestra FTW! :)


    @ MLB, your rolleyes smilie, as well as your general tone, constituted "knocking it". And, if you read the Guide, it specifically says that there's no shame in waiting more than three dates.
     
  12. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    And your use of phrases like "sex outside of relationships has become de rigeur" isn't? :lol:

    I did read it. Nice to know that I have "musty religious views"... :p
     
  13. Gaith

    Gaith Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Re: Gaith Presents: The Hitchhiker's Guide to Dating 21st-Century Wome

    Hey, some people like musty. If it works for ya, party on. :p
     

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