DS9 Caption Contest 88: Regrets, I've Had a Few

Discussion in 'Star Trek: Deep Space Nine' started by Smellincoffee, Feb 23, 2014.

  1. Smellincoffee

    Smellincoffee Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Heart of Dixie
    Not that everybody didn't have a wonderful Valentine's Day, but this week's theme is....mistakes and regrets. ;) But first, some winners from last week!

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    And finally...

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    Thanks to all who participated -- a few of you made it difficult to just choose just one. And now -- no regrets?


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  2. Happy Xmas (War Is Over)

    Happy Xmas (War Is Over) Fleet Admiral Premium Member

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    Location:
    If you want it
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    O'BRIEN: Look, I'm telling you, Kieko is on vacation! That's why no one has seen her lately!

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    KLINGON: You're in my seat!
     
  3. JirinPanthosa

    JirinPanthosa Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2012
    tftw!

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    OPAKA: Do not be concerned with the fact that I must remain here. Whoever replaces me as Kai will be every bit as reasonable and helpful as I was.

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    KLINGON: Okay, you won the extradition trial. But seriously, you know Worf is a dangerous psycho unfit for command, right?

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    ODO: If you ever do date the other me, I will tell you upfront: I am willing to look like a muscular twenty year old, and all you need to do is ask.

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    NOG: I've had it! I'm not going to pretend to like a 1940s Earth crooner stereotype anymore! And I don't care how unpopular it makes me.

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    Sisko: Chief! Are you the one who superglued the Constable's hands to his elbows?
     
  4. Santa Garrus

    Santa Garrus Calibrating the Holidays Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2000
    Location:
    LeadHead
    Thanks for the win! :bolian:

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    Sisko: Kai Opaka, I wouldn't worry about Kira's piloting skills. I sent her to Starfleet to take advanced piloting training. Lieutenant Commander Chakotay had nothing but good things to say...

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    Cha'Pok: Captain, I wanted to speak to you...

    Sisko: All I wanted was some peace and quiet. So Advocate Cha'Pok, I'm about to advocate for your butt to get kicked.


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    Kira: No, Odo. I can't do this. It's too painful.

    Odo: I'm so sorry to have brought you here to your own grave.

    Kira: No, that was interesting. Did Garak teach you nothing about fashion? That's the worst shirt ever!

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    Jadzia: Great, now you're rapidly aging. Do I have to?

    Kira: Yup.

    Jadzia: Fine, from now on, Sisko will call you "Old Man."

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    Nog had finally worked past his fears about the war, but could not face his greatest fear: tieing a bow-tie.

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    Sisko: Lets go through this again...

    O'Brien: Julian said that his appendix was inflamed. He said he'd have to wait until Doctor Merani got back tonight to operate.

    Odo: And then...

    O'Brien: And then I dared him to operate on himself.

    Sisko: Chief...

    O'Brien: In my own defense, he came up with the idea to do the operation in Quarks on his own!
     
  5. The Laughing Vulcan

    The Laughing Vulcan Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2004
    Location:
    At The Laughing Vulcan's party...
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    Opaka: "Keep you eyes on the spacelanes, Emissary, hands at ten to two."
    Sisko: "Back seat pilot!"

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    Cha'Pok: "I will gladly refrain from killing you on Tuesday, for a targburger today."

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    Odo: "You died in the crash, but it's okay. I want you to know that I got over it."

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    Future Bashir: "I'm here to warn you about the future, about the Dominion War, the Founders, the Pah-Wraiths and Dukat that cause your death, Jadzia, all the times you get tortured, Miles, and that really bad haircut you have in six years, Nerys."

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    The look of a man who couldn't get laid even in a holosuite...

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    Odo: "You're accused of contributing to the torture and abuse of several Bajoran children and ten children of other races on this station, two Bajoran adults, and significantly reducing business traffic on the promenade."
    O'Brien: "How the devil did I do that?"
    Sisko: "You let Molly join the school choir. Keiko must be immune, but the other teachers are complaining. The rest of the class are having nightmares. Bashir has even had to treat several of the station's Cardassian Voles for stress.
     
  6. Armored Saint

    Armored Saint Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    Oct 26, 2012
    Location:
    Quebec City
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    In the first draft of the script, the characters didn't return to their twelve-year-old bodies, but instead had their physical attribute swapped: Picard was black, Keiko was bald, Ro was asian and Guinan was Bajoran.
     
  7. Finngle Bells

    Finngle Bells Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2006
    Location:
    Finn
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    Odo: *thinking* I shouldn't tell her about the video camera Bashir hid in her quarter back on the station. I'll tell my younger self to reroute the feed to my office. Same with Dax. Only if they knew all the things that bastard told me in his deathbed.
     
  8. Ríu ríu chíu

    Ríu ríu chíu Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 10, 2005
    Location:
    Mr. Laser Beam is in the visitor's bullpen
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    Worst. Cialis commercial. EVER.

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    Ch'Pok: I wish I knew how to quit you.

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    "Good evening, I'd like to talk to you all about Amway."
     
    Last edited: Feb 24, 2014
  9. Smellincoffee

    Smellincoffee Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    May 20, 2005
    Location:
    Heart of Dixie
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    Kai Opaka's commentary made her a great comedian, but a lousy confessor.

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    Sisko, thinking: I don't care if you're Kahless himself, NO ONE interupts my first RAKAJINO!


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    Odo said she had been a faithful wife, but where did the children with nose ridges come from?


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    Is there any hand worse than a 16 in blackjack?
     
  10. Roddenberry

    Roddenberry Lieutenant Commander Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2014
    Location:
    Bristol, UK.
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    Sisko: If she pushes the assistance button one more time, may the prophets help her.

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    Ch'Pok: Have you no honour? You take my seat, my breakfast, what next, my bed?
    Sisko: I believe you're confusing me with Gul Dulox.

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    Odo: I've been a tree.
    Kira: I know, but I think you got the wrong end of the stick when I said I wanted to put down roots.

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    As Julian's genetic engineering had recently started to produce strange side effects and growths, everyone tried their hardest not to stare.

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    Nog (upset) : TV has lied to me again, bow ties aren't cool.

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    Sisko: I sent the woman I Love to prison.
    Odo: I can't express my feelings to the one I love.
    O'Brien: I married Keiko.
    Sisko & Odo (In unison) : You win!
     
  11. Gil T.Azell

    Gil T.Azell Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2005
    Location:
    Gil T.Azell
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    Nog: "Nog!, James Nog."
     
  12. shivkala

    shivkala Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2004
    Location:
    Patrolling Sector 2814
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    Though, Sisko was snubbed for Best Actor, "Flying Kai Opaka," won the Oscar for "Best Remake of a Movie That Didn't Need a Remake," a category added to the Oscars when it became clear more remakes were being made than original movies in 2018.

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    Cha'Pok: What is that?

    Sisko: Are you telling me you can't identify Raktajino?

    Cha'Pok: Of course I can, but why would you be drinking something we use to clean our toilets?
     
  13. Happy Xmas (War Is Over)

    Happy Xmas (War Is Over) Fleet Admiral Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    If you want it
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    CHA'POK: You just gonna sit and drink water or are you gonna order something?
     
  14. Armored Saint

    Armored Saint Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2012
    Location:
    Quebec City
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    CH'POK: ...the dreadful Imperial Klingon judicia...
    SISKO: *spit* So dreadful that Worf's grandpa had been able to avoid death penalty for a longtime sworn enemy of the Empire at a staged trial for presidential assasination?
    CH'POK: If you were a...
    SISKO: Bla bla bla, any other man, bla bla bla, on a Klingon space station...bla bla..without honor...petaQ...
     
  15. Peach Wookiee

    Peach Wookiee Cuddly Mod of Doom Moderator

    Joined:
    May 12, 2001
    Location:
    Peach Wookiee
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    Kai Opaka had no idea that Sisko was readying himself for a speech to the Federation. Unfortunately, humans still relied on the advice to pretend one's audience was in their underwear.
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    Klingon Ambassador: I love you, man.
    Sisko: You're still not getting my raktajino, patakh.
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    Kira: Odo, this isn't exactly a great first date.
    Odo: Why not?
    K: It's downwind of the latrine!
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    No one was sure how to tell Julian that his fly had been open for three days.
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    Breaking Bad: The Ferengi Edition.
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    "There's a 'Torture me' sign on my back?!"
     
  16. Wintermute

    Wintermute Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    Triskelion
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    Kai Opaka: Does the Emissary want a Slim Jim?


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    A Klingon woman would laugh you out of bed for motorboating like that!


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    Odo, when they pilloried me for taking snapshots in the women's showers....
    Yes?
    I knew it was you disguised as me.
    How?
    I'm not circumcised, and also, I don't need to be.


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    Nog: I could have done better with the ladies if my wingman were here.
    Vic: Oh? You mean that kid who got a job as a journalist three hundred years after the death of the newspaper? What was he going to do - conjugate a double entendre?
    Nog: Never mind.


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    Odo: This is ridiculous. We all saw you doing it.
    O'Brien: I said I don't want to talk about it.
    Sisko: Nice geisha outfit, though.
     
  17. Happy Xmas (War Is Over)

    Happy Xmas (War Is Over) Fleet Admiral Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    If you want it
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    NOG: Three shows a night and seven days a week. I'm a Ferengi! How did I let Vic trick me into such a lousy contract?
     
  18. Smellincoffee

    Smellincoffee Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    May 20, 2005
    Location:
    Heart of Dixie
    24 hour warning, tomorrow I'll be picking some winners! Getcher captions in while the gettin's good!
     
  19. Vulpes

    Vulpes Lieutenant Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2011
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    Sisko: Look! Cows!

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    Ch'Pok: Hey there. Lookin' good.
    Sisko (thinking): I wish people wouldn't use my head as a mirror.

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    Nog: I might as well face it: I can't pull off a bow tie the way Bill Nye can.

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    Odo jealously guards his Blu-Ray collection.
     
  20. Wintermute

    Wintermute Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    Triskelion
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    Sisko: It's 90,000 light years to the Gamma Quadrant. We've got a full reactor of warp plasma, half a packet of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses...

    Kai Opaka:
    Hit it.