DS9 Caption Contest 84: To The Bitter End

Discussion in 'Star Trek: Deep Space Nine' started by Ln X, Nov 23, 2013.

  1. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky
    Aloha! Thanks a lot to all who participated in the last contest, and now I shall run my probability distribution program to randomly determine the winners...

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]


    ///

    ///

    ///


    With these five pictures may you caption to the bitter end!

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    Enjoy!
     
  2. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky
    [​IMG]
    Worf: Bring on the painsticks?
    O'Brien: Bloody hell!

    [​IMG]
    Quark: (thinking) If I play my cards right I could make a bundle saving the captain from my brother's malfunctioning holosuites.

    [​IMG]
    Dukat: Has the Emissary come to gloat?

    [​IMG]

    Female Changeling: No changeling has ever hurt a changeling, but you are no longer a changeling... Goodbye Odo.

    [​IMG]

    Sisko: Just a simple matter of assaulting the building huh Weyoun?
     
  3. shivkala

    shivkala Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2004
    Location:
    Patrolling Sector 2814
    [​IMG]

    Martog: Worf, I guess I owe you 100 credits. You were right, the humans would fall for whatever torturous ideas we came up with if we claimed they were Klingon traditions!

    [​IMG]

    Quark: Okay, Captain, I'll get out of here, but trust me, you'll regret not going with the new lighting scheme my source, J'jabrams is selling. I'm close to selling Starfleet on it. It's an alternate reality Starfleet, but their money still spends like ours!

    [​IMG]

    Sisko: You do know that is the Earth symbol used by adolescents for centuries to signify how much you love me, right?

    [​IMG]

    Sisko: I still can't believe that Changeling porn exists, let alone that Quark has some.

    Bashir: Rule 34, sir.

    [​IMG]

    Weyoun: You've changed your hairstyle! I don't like it.
     
  4. bbjeg

    bbjeg Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 24, 2013
    Location:
    Right here buddy.
    [​IMG]
    Bashir: Not more Klingon Dogma.
    O'brien: Worf never sang for me before.
    Sisko: They're not bad
    Alexander: What are they saying?

    [​IMG]
    Dukat: ... but what have I done wrong?

    [​IMG]
    Bashir: You could have made it a little bigger.
     
  5. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    MEANY: I get that Klingon episodes are popular, but making us wear Klingon uniforms is a bit too much.

    [​IMG]

    FEMALE CHANGELING: Push Odo. Push! The baby's almost here!

    BASHIR: Wait, Odo's female?

    FEMALE CHANGELING: Actually,all Changelings are female.

    SISKO: Can I be the one to tell Kira?
     
  6. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2000
    Location:
    On the Citadel or The TrekBBS Armada Starbase
    [​IMG]

    Worf: I am honored that you would choose to be a part of this ceremony. Now, we will begin the ritual dance party. Computer, activate playlist: "Disco 1."


    [​IMG]

    Captains Log: Quark recording. After taking control of Deep Space Nine, as part of his plan to retake DS9, Sisko has taken over the bar and is serving Creole food. This will be my last entry as Captain. Dangit.

    [​IMG]

    Dukat: Think of the good times, Benjamin. Like Season 2!

    Sisko: When you tried to extort a Cardassian Politician by using his long lost son as leverage?

    Dukat: Bad example, Season 3!

    Sisko: When you were willing to let DS9 explode if Kira didn't agree to let you put Cardassian troops on the station?

    Dukat: Well, I'm hosed.


    [​IMG]

    Female Changeling: ...And as a final punishment, we have given you extreme acne.

    [​IMG]

    Sisko: ... As you can see, the dance floor is located in the inner chamber. Transporters can not penetrate the shielding, so we'll need bribe money to get us past the bouncer.
     
  7. Enterprise1981

    Enterprise1981 Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Oct 23, 2008
    Location:
    Tethered to a large plant
    [​IMG]
    Bashir: "Snore! This is only about the 500th time I've heard the story of Kahless and Moroth."
    O'Brien: "Oh, something that bores even the genetically engineered."

    [​IMG]
    Quark: (thinking) "Whatever he's suggesting, it better not send us to Earth's past again."

    [​IMG]
    Dukat: "But I'm Gul Dukat. You know who I am damn it!"

    [​IMG]
    Bashir: "Wait, how did she come through the time portal fully clothed?"

    [​IMG]
    Sisko: "I take it our common enemy is in that building. What's the catch, Weyoun?"
     
  8. Finn

    Finn Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2006
    Location:
    Austin, TX
    [​IMG]

    Bashir: Why not a Klingon? Dax hadn't had a threesome with Klingons in a while.
     
  9. Bad Thoughts

    Bad Thoughts Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2013
    Location:
    Containment Area for Relocated Yankees
    Bashir: Why? Wasn't the "Uncle Kurzon is now Aunt Jadzia" talk with Jake hard enough?
     
  10. JirinPanthosa

    JirinPanthosa Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2012
    [​IMG]

    WORF: We now begin the ritual drinking of Koraba Blood, which is poisonous to all races except Klingons.
    SISKO: What?! I mean...yeah, let's do it.
    WORF: ...Seriously? Well, umm...okay. There is honor in abject stupidity.

    [​IMG]

    ROM: You know brother, I'm starting to think that cheating everybody as much as possible is not profitable in the long term, and we'd actually make more money if we honored contracts and made people trust us a little more.
    QUARK: Putting good business sense before profit? And you call yourself a Farengi.

    [​IMG]

    SISKO: Why are you here Dukat?
    DUKAT: What? Can't a guy just stop buy and let his friends know how much better he is than everyone?

    [​IMG]

    FEMALE CHANGELING: Goodbye Odo. Being human is really the ultimate punishment, as we know nothing about human physiology offers anybody any real pleasure.
    BASHIR: *snrk*
    SISKO: Ssh. Don't ruin this for Odo.

    [​IMG]

    WEYOUN: As you see, Commander Sisko. Objective proof the Weyoun DNA is perfect, and that Weyouns never die.
     
  11. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Location:
    Open the door!
    [​IMG]

    Worf: Prepare yourselves for the worst. Torture, malnutrition, inhumane conditions....

    O'Brien: Worse than sipping international flavored cappuccinos with Keiko's book club?

    Sisko: You're making Julian cry.
     
  12. Nebusj

    Nebusj Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2005
    Hooray! Thank you kindly.


    [​IMG]
    ``O'Brien…remind me again just how we got drafted by the Klingons this time?''
    ``Hey, we're getting off easy. These are the uniforms for the Tactical Actuarial Division trainees.''

    [​IMG]
    ``And what, now, are we bid for this … uh … fine … gold-painted Wii controller? I have got to start looking at these things before we start the auctions.''

    [​IMG]
    ``I wuv ooo dis much.''
    ``OK, I'm unsettled by that statement in no fewer than fourteen ways.''

    [​IMG]
    ``Just hold on a few more minutes, we'll grow your feathers in and you'll make a fantastic turkey.''
    ``What?''

    [​IMG]
    ``And, Sisko, as you see on our genetic scan --- ''
    ``Wait, this isn't a genetic scan, this is the emergency exits for the library tower.''
    ``Um … look over there, a big distracting thing!'' [ Running away. ]
     
  13. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    DUKAT: "Round up the usual suspect", eh Captain? There's hope for you yet, Sisko.
     
  14. Avro Arrow

    Avro Arrow Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2003
    Location:
    Right where I want to be
    [​IMG]

    Bashir: Y'know, Miles, it was way more interesting when we did this on Kirk's Enterprise...

    [​IMG]

    Rom: Look, brother! Kayla and Charles are finally getting back together. They've been through so much!
    Quark: Either turn the channel, or give me that remote!

    [​IMG]

    Sisko was getting uncomfortable with Dukat's increasingly blatant attempts to get Sisko to look at his crotch.

    [​IMG]

    Female Changeling: He's dead.
    Bashir: One body and three suspects, on an island only 10 square metres large. What do you think, Captain?
    Sisko: What the hell, Doctor? Who do I look like to you, Shaft?!

    [​IMG]

    Sisko: ... and the treasure is believed to be at the bottom of this large underground tomb.
    Weyoun: I'm not going to like this, am I?
    Sisko: No. And for the rest of this mission, your name is 'Short Round'.
     
  15. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    SISKO: Thanks for the idea, Weyoun, but I'm thinking more of something more in a ranch style.
     
  16. Smellincoffee

    Smellincoffee Commodore Commodore

    Joined:
    May 20, 2005
    Location:
    Heart of Dixie
    [​IMG]
    Worf: And now, the Ravishing of the Women!
    Bashir, snapping awake: Yes? Yes? Women?
    Worf: Hah! No. No women.
    (On Bashir's groan and collapse.)
    ...And they say I have no sense of humor.

    [​IMG]
    Quark: There it is, Rom. My own moon!
    Rom: Brother, that's no moon. That's a space station.
    ..ohh, and they're firing at us.
    Quark: COUSIN GAILA! I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!



    [​IMG]
    Gul Dukat: Oh, come on, Benjamin! Surely a compliment wouldn't hurt. Say it!
    Sisko, resigned: Fine. Fine! Diabolical, I'll give you. But I will not refer to your latest scheme as masterfully cunning.


    [​IMG]
    Sisko: What is it?
    Weyoun: Plans for growing...me! Just imagine, captain, your own private Weyoun! A clone of your own, to see to your every need.
    Sisko: A punching bag. It has possibilities.
    Weyoun: I was hoping you'd think 'butler'.
     
  17. Mistral

    Mistral Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2007
    Location:
    Between the candle and the flame
    Weyoun: "Your move, Captain."

    Sisko: "I love electronic Jenga!"
     
  18. shivkala

    shivkala Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2004
    Location:
    Patrolling Sector 2814
    [​IMG]

    Weyoun: As you can see, Captain, this "grassy knoll" theory is bunk. The shots had to have come from the book depository.
     
  19. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk The Real Me Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    Down in the tube station at midnight
    [​IMG]

    WEYOUN: And this "Rube Goldberg" is one of your greatest engineers?
     
  20. T'Girl

    T'Girl Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2009
    Location:
    T'Girl
    [​IMG]

    Sisko: "SOMEONE TURN ON THE FUKKING LIGHTS !!!"


    :)