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View Poll Results: Grade the movie...
Excellent 18 10.17%
Above Average 38 21.47%
Average 50 28.25%
Below Average 30 16.95%
Poor 41 23.16%
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Old July 3 2009, 04:25 AM   #301
Newski
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

I'm pretty sure I've seen worse movies during my twenty four years on this planet. And yes, I know I've seen dumber. What makes Transformers so unbearable is the fact that it's bad, it's dumb, and it is really long. Boring, too.

I don't recall exactly what I gave the first film, but I believe it was one and a half to two stars. A bad movie with some redeeming values. Terrible, yes, not just because of it's poorly written script and childish sense of humor, but because very time they give you something to latch on to, and like, they kill that shred of hope almost immediately. Tranformers: Revenge of the Fallen starts out that way, but we soon learn that it's everything the first one is, but worse. We have one great battle sequence, Optimus Prime fighting several enemies until his alleged death. This sequence is ruined, because often times we don't see the fight, but Shia LaBeauf's Sam Witwicky running from the fight.

As far as the idiotic sense of humor, we get to see gods humping eachother. Twice. And if that's not enough, a tiny Decepticon (or, for the less nerdy, Bad-Guy-Bot) humps Megan Fox's leg. Is this what you really want? Is this what passes as humor to the braindead fanboy audience? Did you at one point think "Hey, Michael Bay, knock it off, we are smarter than this" ? No, probably not. After all, you came to see Giant Robots.

The movie is called "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen." I'll give you a more accurate title. "Sam Witwicky." The Transformers themselves are one dimensional. You have the wise cracking twins, created by a man who thinks robots talking black slang is funny, despite the fact that nothing they say if funny, or relevant, and is in fact very irritating. You have Bumblebee, who starts out as the most human but becomes "Just a robot" by the end. And then, we have Optimus, who sits it out for most of the film. Just like in the first film, the Transformers themselves are treated by the characters and by the filmmakers as giant robots, despite being super powered and super intelligent beings that have evolved beyond our wildest dreams.

At any rate, the story makes for some great B-Grade camp. Giant robots from other space need to harvest our sun for energy, using a device they hid here during ancient times. This movie, however, is played straight. All the laughs are supposed to come from action movie lines that are so terrible they'd make Joel Schumacker cringe. Yes, Arnold's Mr. Freeze was a lot more on the mark than any of the Autobots (or, for the not so nerdy, Good-Guy-bots).

So, what makes this movie so terrible,so unwatchable? Well, it's just plain bad. The characters lack any personality. Sam Witwicky goes to the point of monologing about how he's an average kid.Yeah, with a giant robot car, a super sexy girlfriend, a big ass house, parents who buy him a car for his High School graduation. No, you aren't average. Even without your Extra Terrestrial aquantainces you are far from normal.

His Girlfriend is mere eye candy. Typical action movie girl. Strong and independent, except when she needs to be saved. She serves no purpose, other than eye candy for the teenage male audience. She lacked personality in the first film, and now they've stolen what little she had. She spends most of her time complaining about how Sam won't say 'I love you.' For Christ's sake, you are being chased by giant robots. You have more important things to worry about.

Sam's new college roommate is a conspiracy theorist who believes the Transformers are real. Because, you know, they were able to cover up a giant robot battle in Los Angeles. They were able to cover up a giant robot Battle in Shanghai (one of the high points of the film but low points in Action movie shtick). Clearly, the government can cover this up. His friends talk in geek speak and act like they come right out of the punchline to a really bad joke. Then, of course, since this is college, we have to have that really elaborate college party that doesn't actually happen.

Is that nitpicking? No, it's me distracting myself. From what, you ask? The real problem with this movie. The real problem is the movie is absolutely, undeniably idiotic. We have a decepticon with a human body, that still has a human tongue when it transforms. We have Gold Toothed ebonics speaking robots that can't read. We have endless scenes of shooting into the desert, driving, and dialog that serves no purpose other than to remind us that yes, there is talking in this film. Every ten minutes, they recap the plot (which is just as well, I'm sure people fell asleep during this collasal turd of a movie). And, of course, Shia LaBeauf dies and goes to Robot heaven. Just let that least one sink in for a little bit.


The second the movie brought us to Robot heaven, I started thinking that maybe the dogs humping eachother so idiot teens can giggle like morons might have been the intellectual high point of the film.






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Old July 3 2009, 05:15 AM   #302
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

I saw the new Transformers movie and while it was decent (In a Michael Bay Sense of the word) and I still didn't know what the transformers were (Sideswipe, the red and green cars, for example) I do have a question. Now before that, I'm not that big into Transformers as others here so if there is a comic book or something like that, I'm ignorant about it.

Now my question. Why is the leader of the Decepticons (Played brilliently by Tony Todd, again by the way) called "The Fallen?" When I saw the title, I thought this movie would be about Megatron rising back up to power and feature of the decepticons. They did the latter, but Megatron was annoyingly sidelined again. I mean you have characters like Optimus Prime, Sideswipe, Ironhide, Jet Fire, and the all powerful Transformer portrayed in this movie was just simply "The Fallen." That doesn't seem too cool does it?
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Old July 3 2009, 07:19 AM   #303
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

they explained that in the movie:

he was one of the seven Primes, but because he turned against the others and broke the rule that they should never use a solar harvester on an inhabited world, he was 'cast out' and was afterwards only known as 'The Fallen'.
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Old July 3 2009, 07:43 AM   #304
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

Yeah, the other Primes refer to him as "The Fallen." I doubt he calls himself that.
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Old July 3 2009, 05:22 PM   #305
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

Saw it on IMAX yesterday theater was 75% full.

It was good, not excellent, would I recommend it to my fellow trek fans.
Only if your a fan of Optimas Prime and Meagan Fox, those two make the movie worth seeing.

At times you can't tell what is happening between the robots, who is winning.

I wanted more Optimas he wasn't in the movie enough.

And in Transformers 3, bumble bee better get his voice back, enough of the radio and TV funnies. Although when he was in the car with that other hot chick, what he played was pretty funny.
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Old July 3 2009, 06:05 PM   #306
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

The voice for Bumbleebee at the end of TF1 didn't really suit him IMO.


Not sure the original "Spider-Man" voice would've worked either, though. While Cullen has a deep voice that works theatrically as well as on TV, I don't think Bumbleebee's original voice would translate as well.
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Old July 3 2009, 10:16 PM   #307
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

Thursday Box Office: Transformers regains the top spot from Ice Age 3 in a squeaker! It's total is now Domestic $250,905,000 + Foreign $235,410,471 = $486,315,471
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Old July 4 2009, 12:44 AM   #308
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

Poor.

Quite possibly the worst movie I've ever paid to see in a cinema. It goes on for far too long with a plot that makes no sense explained in confusing dialogue you can barely hear over all the explosions and things generally smashing about. I couldn't tell one Decepticon from the other and most of the Autobots lacked any kind of personality.

The "comedy" with Sam's parents and his roommate was terrible and did not make me laugh once either.

I was waiting for Rodimus Prime to show up there when the Matrix of Leadership came up.
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Old July 4 2009, 01:04 AM   #309
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

I don't understand why people say the plot makes no sense. Bad guy robots want to suck the sun dry. This isn't like POTC3 which had a pretty complicated story of constant betrayals and twists (which I still didn't find confusing).
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Old July 4 2009, 01:14 AM   #310
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

Mr Light wrote: View Post
I don't understand why people say the plot makes no sense. Bad guy robots want to suck the sun dry. This isn't like POTC3 which had a pretty complicated story of constant betrayals and twists (which I still didn't find confusing).
The plot made enough sense. There just wasn't, ya know, a whole lot of it. Next to the bad robots destroying the sun, the second biggest "conflict" was that Sam hadn't said "I love you" yet.
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Old July 4 2009, 01:18 AM   #311
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

They didn't really get to the plot until maybe the final 3rd of the movie. For that alone they could have cut a lot of it out to make it shorter.
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Old July 4 2009, 01:26 AM   #312
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

tomalak301 wrote: View Post
They didn't really get to the plot until maybe the final 3rd of the movie. For that alone they could have cut a lot of it out to make it shorter.
What would you have cut out, though? Surely we could not have understood the rest of the movie without the important setup scene of Sam's mom getting high?!
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Old July 4 2009, 01:28 AM   #313
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

While I have a ton of my own criticisms of the movie (mostly surrounding the idiotic humor), I think the writer missed a couple things or is just more nit picky than I am. Some thoughts on a few of his points:

1. Transformers Don't Mate
Well, I'll agree with him on this point. Transformers have never been shown mating in the way human beings do. The closest they ever came was an asexual "cell division" type splitting where one robot could "birth" another. Still, Legel misses the point that they were playing Wheelie up like a dog (hence the humping, which I hated BTW). And contrary to what he says, there are female Transformers, and have been since the original series. By "female" that means they have what we humans regard as "feminine" forms with curves, thinner frames and even (yes) fuller lips. They are even called "female" in the show by Shockwave.

2. Sam Witwicky's Hand Gets Bandaged By Ghosts
This struck me as a bit odd too, but more because of me wondering where the bandages came from. Still, to me it's not beyond reason that he had them in Bumblebee's glove compartment or something. I have no problem with the time continuity of the scene since by the time Sam's bandage is on, it's clear a few minutes have passed for all the characters to gather in one spot for Jetfire to talk to them.

3. Sam Witwicky Would Have Been Killed by the Mini-Transformers at Close Range
It wasn't the mini-Transformers that caused the huge damage to the house, it was Bumblebee with his big blast. The mini-Transformers were firing weapons that did a bit of damage here and there, but the key is they didn't hit Sam with any concentrated bursts of firepower. Their aim seemed pretty bad overall and it's not like their weapons were taking out walls.

6. Five Targets Sink to Depths to Get Megatron ... and Yet Six Come Out
I don't think Legel counted "Scalpel", the little "doctor Decepticon" which didn't appear separate from the group until they got to the bottom and Ravage "ejected" him from his chest. That would explain the numbers changing since going down, the doctor and Ravage would have counted as one "object" going down.

8. The Back of the Smithsonian is a desert?
I wondered about this one too when I first saw the movie. However, after seeing it again last night, I realized that the area in the back of the hangar wasn't just sand. It was actually a huge area covered in grass, even the area Sam cuts the symbols into. The way it's described in the article, you'd think they stepped into the Sahara. I just assumed for the sake of sanity that the way the museum is in this "movie universe", it has a big open area of grass outside with old planes parked there.

9. One Aircraft Carrier is Destroyed in 90 Seconds. The Rest Are Left in Peace?
Legel actually confuses two scenes. Megatron's rescue doesn't involve an aircraft carrier at all. The Constructicons and Ravage hop off a cargo ship to get Megatron. It isn't until much later in the movie when The Fallen comes to Earth that the aircraft carrier is taken up. As for why not every one on Earth, it makes sense to me. They have limited Energon to create the "hatchlings" that would later take part in the final battle. I assumed they simply didn't have enough warriors to go trashing every aircraft carrier and destroyer in existence. I know this isn't explicitely said, but I just connected the dots between things that were said in the movie on this one.

The Transformers Have Superior Technology ... and yet heat-seeking eludes them?
Not only did the 'cons want the "fairy dust" (as Legel describes it) but they also needed Sam intact so they could etract the information from his brain. Blowing him to pieces wouldn't have done that.

I'm not saying the movie was a masterpiece of tight writing, but some of his points do have explanations IMO.
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Old July 4 2009, 01:36 AM   #314
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

exodus wrote: View Post
We've seen Tranformers in the films up-grade, Jetfire can't?
To be fair, we saw Transformers that have been maintained and active take on new forms. In Megatron's case, he was frozen for less than a century or so (I forget exactly how long he was frozen), while it was implied that Jetfire has been around far longer age-wise. My assumption was that he just didn't have the ability to upgrade by simply scanning a new form and morphing. He had parts falling off of him left and right before they got to Egypt, he was hardly in optimal condition.

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However, the best worse moment of the film was: Sam dies and goes to robot heaven. That's something only a 12 year old finds logical.
I don't disagree that this can be seen as a very silly concept. However, it does have precedence in Transformers history. In the original series, the Matrix of Leadership was shown to contain the essence and knowledge of all previous Autobot leaders. When a leader died, they would become part of this Matrix. The Autobot leader Rodimus Prime once brought himself to a near deactivated stage so he could enter the Matrix and consult the "spirits" within for their knowledge. The way I see it, Sam did something very similar in this movie. In that respect I thought it was pretty cool.
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Old July 4 2009, 01:57 AM   #315
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Re: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - Grading & Discussion

RoJoHen wrote: View Post
tomalak301 wrote: View Post
They didn't really get to the plot until maybe the final 3rd of the movie. For that alone they could have cut a lot of it out to make it shorter.
What would you have cut out, though? Surely we could not have understood the rest of the movie without the important setup scene of Sam's mom getting high?!

The annoying parents, the college roommate, the humping gags, just to name a few.
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