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Old April 8 2009, 07:28 PM   #1
Jayson
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Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

I have a date this friday. We have been chatting and getting along but when she found out I don't beleive in religion she said she wasn't sure if she could be with a non-beleive. First there was the Christian girl who would show me her boobs over the webcam but then this! Why God do you keep blocking my cock from having any fun that isn't self-created from my own hands? Please stop!! If you allow me to get laid I promise you I will try and save the soul of Rush Limbaugh. I know it's proably to late but if I email his website and tell him to stop being evil it could work.


Jason
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Old April 8 2009, 07:31 PM   #2
ZUUL-iet
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

Nothing wrong with Pennis...
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Old April 8 2009, 08:09 PM   #3
bigdaddy
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

Rush is the antichrist, didn't you know that?

However he gets more pussy than you it seems.
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Old April 8 2009, 08:25 PM   #4
Pingfaaaaarrrrgh
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

Jayson wrote: View Post
I have a date this friday. We have been chatting and getting along but when she found out I don't beleive in religion she said she wasn't sure if she could be with a non-beleive. First there was the Christian girl who would show me her boobs over the webcam but then this! Why God do you keep blocking my cock from having any fun that isn't self-created from my own hands? Please stop!! If you allow me to get laid I promise you I will try and save the soul of Rush Limbaugh. I know it's proably to late but if I email his website and tell him to stop being evil it could work.


Jason
You should have lied.
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Old April 8 2009, 08:52 PM   #5
An Officer
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

You got boobies... what more do you want?
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Old April 8 2009, 08:57 PM   #6
Screamy
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

That's one picky tranny-monkey-cheerleader if she won't date you if you're not Methodist.
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Old April 8 2009, 09:55 PM   #7
Asbo Zaprudder
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

"Kneel down, move your lips in prayer, and you will believe." Pascal

... and while you're down there ...
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Old April 8 2009, 09:57 PM   #8
Mallory
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

You still have time to learn all you need to know about the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
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Old April 8 2009, 10:03 PM   #9
Goliath
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

Deuterostome wrote: View Post
"Kneel down, move your lips in prayer, and you will believe." Pascal

... and while you're down there ...
"You better pray real good, now..."

*Banjo from Deliverance plays in the background*
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Old April 8 2009, 10:06 PM   #10
Servo
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

Zion Ravescene wrote: View Post
Sorry, but #1 should have been the Steve Martin one; "Hey Steve, how come you're not funny anymore?"
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Last edited by Servo; April 8 2009 at 10:21 PM.
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Old April 8 2009, 10:18 PM   #11
All Seeing Eye
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

Jayson wrote: View Post
I have a date this friday. We have been chatting and getting along but when she found out I don't beleive in religion she said she wasn't sure if she could be with a non-beleive. First there was the Christian girl who would show me her boobs over the webcam but then this! Why God do you keep blocking my cock from having any fun that isn't self-created from my own hands? Please stop!! If you allow me to get laid I promise you I will try and save the soul of Rush Limbaugh. I know it's proably to late but if I email his website and tell him to stop being evil it could work.


Jason
Oh for goodness sake man, go out for a night on the town, get pissed and get laid if you're that bothered.
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Old April 8 2009, 10:56 PM   #12
urbandk
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

stop chasing after religious girls. work the topic in a casual way into the first date if there seems to be any danger of religiosity. if there is, run!
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Old April 8 2009, 11:03 PM   #13
JuanBolio
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

You live in Oklahoma. There's your first problem.
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Old April 8 2009, 11:20 PM   #14
Servo
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

Your pennis makes the baby Jesus cry.
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Old April 8 2009, 11:23 PM   #15
JuanBolio
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Re: Why God!! Why do you hate my pennis so much!!

Especially when Jayson wipes the blood on baby Jesus' teddy bear.

As an aside, I just heard someone on Sesame Street ask: "Why does that beaver need so much wood?"



Good times.
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