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Old November 1 2009, 12:01 AM   #1
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October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

Vassals and Rebels

It is our pleasure to present to you the following collaboration between JustKate and Thor Damar. The following is based on Thor Damar's Alea iacta est.


Vassals and Rebels: a New History of the Bajoran Liberation

It is an often held truth that to study history is to know and understand the heart and soul of real events and in doing so we may prevent the horrors of the past from repeating themselves. At the Cardassian Historical Institute we have undertaken to achieve this most noble end. We have therefore compiled this edition commemorating the seventieth anniversary of what is now known as the ‘liberation war’.

We have chosen to use sources from all the participants in this conflict, from the personal diaries of Bajoran Resistance fighters to the formal addresses of the late Terran Emperor...

We are pleased to include several formerly classified documents within this collection amongst which is the transcript of the closed trial of Commandant William Tiberius Riker for crimes against sentient beings and the complete and unedited interview with the legendry Spock during the first years of the war.

The Terran Empire’s invasion of Bajor in 2320 was a direct result of the aggressive expansionist polices of the Imperial Government of the Emperor Cartwright coupled with the arrogant isolationism of First Minister Keeve Falor. It was the surprise attack on HMIS Kissinger that ushered in the short-lived Imperial/Bajoran War and the long and vicious Occupation. The reasons for the harsh cruelty of the occupation and the precise aims of the Empire have been the source of much debate amongst both academia and the general populace of a hundred worlds.

What is known and generally agreed upon by most respected commentators is that the abundant natural resources of Bajor provided a key criterion for annexation especially in light of the Empire’s war with the Klingon Regency and the Tzenkethi Hegemony. However what is also widely known is that after several decades of strip mining, said resources were depleted, resulting in the Empire maintaining a horrendously expensive occupation for no logical purpose or gain. Former Prelate Spock has theorised that...

The shocking and unexpected decision by the Castellan of the Cardassian Fourth Republic to commit his forces to the liberation of Bajor represented a seismic shift in Alpha Quadrant politics. In his declaration of war, Enabran Tain promised to ‘bring light into the galaxy after the cloak of darkness that has obscured liberty’. A wise and beloved leader, Tain is perhaps most famous for...

The Interstellar Resistance League (IRL) was founded in 2368 with the shocking defection of Commander Benjamin Sisko from the Imperial Guard. It was made up of cells on many Imperial Occupied worlds and acted as a fulcrum for acts of guerrilla warfare against the Guard. Its most notable success was the destruction of...

After the Liberation of Bajor, the Cardassian Republic made the historic and galaxy-defining move of inviting its allies to create an interstellar Coalition that would provide stability and peace throughout the Alpha Quadrant and the rest of the Galaxy. Indeed it could be argued that without the Coalition there would have been no long period of prosperity that enabled the exploration of much of the Galaxy.

In his Notes on a Cultural Being, Aamin Marrtiza states that the very act of resisting oppression creates the very means to induce intellectual and moral development, and that by understanding why these events happened one can learn to create a new and better society. We at the Institute share this belief and we are proud to have worked with so many others in setting out this historical record. We would like to thank the researchers at the central Imperial archives for allowing us access to their files of the Vulcan Protectorate and the many private individuals (many of whom declined to be named for personal reasons) who have kindly allowed us access to various dairies and personal logs.

The Occupation of Bajor is a clear example to many sentient beings across the quadrant of cruelty and oppression and is still remembered with much solemnity. Understandably the decision to publish these records has proven to be most controversial and a source of much bitter debate.

With that in mind we have sought to provide for all the many different perspectives and viewpoints which have arisen over the decades. It is our hope that this volume will encourage a spirit of reconciliation and understanding between the participants of this terrible war.

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Old November 1 2009, 12:02 AM   #2
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

* * * * *

Interview with Prelate Spock of the Vulcan Protectorate Authority
Date: 2370
Notes from the reporter's notePADD of Skrain Macet, financial reporter for the Lakarian Media Group, Cardassia Prime
Interview conducted on an unnamed frigate in the Badlands

Historian's note: Skrain Macet had originally planned to interview Prelate Spock as part of his research for a projected series on the economy of the Terran Empire as it affected Cardassia and its environs. After hostilities broke out between the Empire and the Bajoran-Cardassian bloc, plans for that interview were of course discarded. Macet, however - excited at the prospect of covering a real, breaking hard-news story, as any reporter would be who had somewhat reluctantly spent his career analyzing commodity futures and stocks-to-use ratios - didn't want to return tamely to Cardassia and resume his normal duties. He therefore convinced his superiors that he should try to reestablish contact with Spock and interview him about the hot story of the day: Bajor.

Using a series of go-betweens (the identities of whom he confided to no one, including his editors), he succeeded in reestablishing that contact and - somewhat to his surprise - found the Prelate eager talk about the Bajoran occupation. Perhaps more importantly, in light of the role the Bajoran Liberation played in the history of Vulcan, Spock was, according to Macet, even more eager to find out what was happening on Bajor. One suspects that the Prelate got at least as much as he received in this exchange.


The site of the interview was determined by a long-planned diplomatic tour of portions of the Empire, which the Terran authorities evidently decided not to cancel despite the hostilities - in an effort, perhaps, to downplay the importance of the conflict. The following, therefore, includes a transcript of Macet's interview with Spock, as well as the supplemental notes he made on his "reporter's notePADD," the multi-media recording device commonly used by reporters of the era.

-------

To the Senior Editors, news desk, Lakarian Media Group: The source agreed to the interview only under the condition that all material is to be used as "not for attribution." The prelate prefers to be identified as "a high-level source in the Vulcan Protectorate who asked not to be identified to avoid reprisals from the Terran government."


-—-—---

(Questions for interview with Prelate Spock:
1. Bajor - was he aware of the conditions of the Bajoran people?
2. What are those conditions?
3. What actions has Vulcan taken to alleviate those conditions?
4. Why was Bajor treated so much more harshly than other conquered worlds?)


Skrain Macet: Thank you again, Prelate, for agreeing to meet with me. I...this is such an opportunity for me, and we - that is, my network and I - are truly grateful for...

Prelate Spock: So you've already said, Mr. Macet - at least twice, to be precise. Your gratitude is noted and appreciated, but it is, I assure you, unnecessary to thank me - not, in any case, at such length. Perhaps we should move on? My time is not unlimited.

Skrain Macet: Of course, of course. [clears throat] Well, let's jump right in with the Occupation...[clears throat]...of Bajor, I mean.

Spock: What about the Occupation, Mr. Macet?

Macet: Well, it was...I mean, the Terrans were...For forty years, Bajor has been occupied by the Empire - brutally occupied, Prelate, according to our intelligence officials.

Spock: I am aware, Mr. Macet - of the duration of Occupation and of its brutality. As you may know, in my role as Prelate and as an ad hoc member of the Imperial Trade Council, I have visited Bajor twice during that period, most recently approximately two years ago.

Macet: But -

Spock: And as you should also know, I am myself a resident of a world that has been occupied by the Empire for more than 200 years. I think it is fair to say that my knowledge of the Empire's methods of...maintaining order is quite extensive.

Macet: Are you telling me, Prelate, that you knew...you have known of the conditions on Bajor? The hunger? The cruelty? The wanton destruction? The prisons? The gulags? The horrors? You knew?

Spock: I knew, Mr. Macet. I knew.

Macet: And you did nothing?

Spock: What would you have me do, Mr. Macet? Like Bajor, Vulcan is a subject world, and like Bajorans, I am a subject of the Emperor.

Macet: There must have been something you could have done.

Spock: Those words are easy to say, Mr. Macet. Coming up with a viable option is much more difficult, as you'll find if you consider it. But are we not getting off the point?

Macet: Cardassia is now committed to helping Bajor, Prelate. My audience needs to understand why its government intervened.

Spock: In other words, the Cardassian government needs to justify its intervention to the Cardassian people. Is that not why you are here?

Macet: I don't work for the government, Prelate. I work for...that is, my duty is to the truth.

Spock: Many people have falsely claimed to serve truth, Mr. Macet. However, I am inclined to take you at your word.

Macet: Prelate, why did the Empire want Bajor? Why did it want Vulcan?

Spock: The Empire, Mr. Macet, wants whatever it can get. This isn't necessarily the case with all Terrans - my own mother was a Terran, after all. But for a certain type of Terran, and virtually every high official I have met appears to fit this type, the ultimate goal isn't merely riches and power. It's control. The Empire is determined to control its own destiny, at all costs. Bajor - and Orion and Denubula and many other worlds and systems - all have been part of that cost.

Macet: Tell me about Bajor, Prefect. I really want to know.

Spock: If Cardassia needs justification for its actions, it need look no farther than Bajor itself. If my information is correct, Cardassian forces are already on Bajor. Isn't that correct, Mr. Macet?

Macet: I'm not...not at liberty to say, Prelate.

Spock: Oh, come, Mr. Macet - even the Empire can't keep something like a serious liberation offensive secret, much as it would like to. In point of fact, the security subcommittee of the Vulcan Protectorate received a briefing on this subject from Vulcan's Imperial governor, the Resident, just last week. She was not particularly forthcoming, but it was evident from her remarks that Cardassia has committed significant forces to Bajor.

Macet: Last week? That was about the time that you...

Spock: Agreed to this interview, yes.

Macet: Is that why you agreed to this interview, Prelate?

Spock: Like you, Mr. Macet, I owe a duty to truth, in addition to my duty to Vulcan.

Macet: I guess there's no point in my denying something that you already know. Yes, Cardassian forces are on Bajor and with the help of resistance fighters have had some success.

Spock: The Imperial Guard was taken wholly by surprise, then. Interesting.

Macet: But about Bajor, Prelate. I have indeed heard...rumours about conditions there, but the stories are so incredible that I would welcome - my audience would welcome - independent confirmation.

Spock: More justification, Mr. Macet?

Macet: Call it what you will, Prelate.

Spock: I meant what I said earlier. Cardassia will find all the justification it needs on Bajor. Perhaps it already has.

According to our sources, and my own observation, the Imperial Guard seems to take a peculiar pleasure in maintaining harsh conditions on Bajor even when there is no benefit to the Empire in doing so. It is most illogical. After all, what good are Bajoran crops to Earth? They would hardly transport katterpods all those light years, and yet every harvest, farmers must turn over a significant portion of their crops to the Empire. What purpose is there for slaves in a highly mechanized society? And yet thousands of Bajorans have been enslaved. Why use forced labor in mines that that could be more efficiently mined using robotic technology? And yet the forced labor camps are even more vast than the prison camps. What purpose is served by continuing to increase the number of Bajoran dead? And yet assuredly many Bajorans have died purposeless deaths - at least they seem so to me, though apparently not to the Emperor.

I don't know what 'rumours' you've heard, Mr. Macet, but I find it difficult to imagine that they are any more...lurid than the reality on Bajor.

Forgive me for making a personal observation, but you speak of Bajor with a certain...passion. Have you been there?

Macet: No. No. But my, well, a relative of mine was among the first troops to see the prison camp in the Kendra Valley, and he saw the starvation and the filth and the hooks hung with chains and the piles of the dead and not-quite-dead and the empty-eyed children and the...the laboratories...

He said it stank of death, Prelate. Death and despair.

Spock: So at least one of the liberation offensives was in the Kendra Valley? That is news to me. And your mention of "laboratories" is quite...illuminating. I have heard 'rumours' as well, you see.

But as for your relative, Mr. Macet, to the best of my knowledge he or she spoke the truth. I have not been to the Kendra Valley, but I have visited similar... facilities. The phrase "stank of death and despair," while somewhat fanciful, does contain a measure of accuracy. Death and despair were indeed common the last time I visited Bajor.

As they were when the Terrans conquered my own world and at intervals on Vulcan since. I have lived my entire life on an occupied world, and I can assure you, the Empire is not now and never has been an indulgent overlord.

Macet: But Vulcan was never subjugated the way Bajor has been.

Spock: I am curious to know where you obtained that impression, Mr. Macet.

Macet: But it wasn't! Everybody knows that!

(Memo: Check with Interplanetary Aid Commission re. conquest of Vulcan.)

Spock: Then I must disagree with 'everybody', Mr. Macet. In fact, I do not believe there is a single Vulcan who would agree with your 'everybody'. Nearly 10 percent of the population was annihilated within one year of the Terran conquest, and another 10 percent within the two years after that.

(Memo: Check with military history department at University of Culat - Vulcan Imperial history. Any statistics from early years of the Terran occupation?)

Certainly my grandfather, who died within a year of being released from the reeducation centre where he'd spent the previous 10 years, would disagree. His crime was conducting Vulcan meditative exercises, which for some reason irritated an Imperial general rather severely. Terran reeducation methods left my grandfather paralysed from the neck down and unable to bear bright lights, so I believe it would be fair to say that he would not feel that he had been treated with any special consideration.

The Empire, Mr. Macet, does not believe in coddling subjugated worlds. It uses those worlds, and the people of those worlds, for the greater glory of the Emperor, and if one is found to be of use, one can prosper - to a degree. As my family, aside from my poor grandfather, of course, has done for nearly 200 years, thanks partly to the influence of my Terran mother. But only to a degree.

Macet: But surely that's all in the past, now that Vulcan is a full-fledged participant in Imperial affairs? Surely that is, well, forgotten now?

Spock: The past? How long does it take to forget horror, Mr. Macet? To forget humiliation? To forget defeat? To forget honour?

Besides, even if Vulcans wanted to forget, they would not be permitted to do so. Terrans - at least most of those I have observed - never do. Terrans never forget that every individual falls into one of two groups: Terran and the 'lesser races'. Despite my Terran blood, I definitely fall into the 'lesser races' category, as does every other Vulcan and every Bajoran. As do you, Mr. Macet.

To a Terran, considering any non-Terran as a "full-fledged" member of the Empire would be unthinkable. To a Terran, all the rest of us are slaves - or ought to be.

Macet: But Vulcan has self-rule! The Protectorate Authority has full autonomy within the planet's sphere of influence!

Spock: Self-rule? Autonomy? What curious misconceptions. The Protectorate makes laws and deliberates policy, certainly. I myself have participated in many such sessions, and if nothing else, they provide invigorating opportunities to hone one's skills at debate. But surely it ought to be obvious that it does so only under the supervision of the Terran Resident - a very polite and interesting woman, but with many Imperial Guardsmen under her direct and indirect command.

I assure you, Mr. Macet, that Vulcan is allowed to go through the motions of ruling itself only because it amuses the Emperor to permit such an illusion. I have sometimes wondered if perhaps the Emperor is bored and this is one of his little hobbies.

Macet: Prelate Spock, forgive my presumption, but how do you bear it? How can you wake up every morning knowing that you and your race are mere serfs of the Empire? How did you reconcile yourself to this...injustice?

Spock: I didn't.

Macet: I'm sorry?

Spock: I did not become 'reconciled', Mr. Macet. I endure it because I must, because although there is little I can do for my people as things are, I must try to do what I can. I have no viable option. For now.

Macet: Excuse me - did you say 'for now'?

Spock: Has your recording device malfunctioned?

Macet: No, but I just wanted to make sure I have understood you.

Spock: If you heard me say 'for now', then yes, you have understood me.

Macet: And by 'for now', you mean...what, exactly? Do you mean something could change in the future? The near future? Something that would greatly change the situation on Vulcan? Or has something already changed? Is Vulcan going to exploit the uncertainty regarding Bajor to increase its autonomy within the Empire? Or --

Spock: I said 'for now', Mr. Macet, and 'for now' is what I meant. Things are as they are 'for now', but in the future, they may change. 'For' and 'now' are very basic words of one syllable each. In what way do you think you could have misunderstood them?


Macet: Stop doing that!

Spock: Doing what, Mr. Macet?

Macet: Stop disclosing important information and pretending it's routine! You've confirmed horrific atrocities on Bajor and pretended that was routine, you've told me things about Vulcan history that I certainly never learned at university - and I hold a degree in galactic history, Prelate! - and you've confirmed that the Vulcan Protectorate Authority is a mere puppet of the Empire! And now you casually toss in those two - let me see here...oh, yes - 'very basic words of one syllable each' that hint that perhaps Vulcan intends to change its status within the Empire, and you're pretending that's routine, too! And worst of all, you're doing so by hiding behind a vocabulary lesson!

So I'm asking you straight out: Do you think the situation on Vulcan will change in the near future? What does Vulcan want from the Empire and how does the liberation of Bajor affect that?

Spock: Mr. Macet, I asked you earlier if your recording device had malfunctioned and you said it had not. Has it malfunctioned now?

Macet: No...

Spock: Because now would be an extremely opportune time for it to malfunction - just for a short time.

Macet: But -

Spock: Turn it off, Mr. Macet.

(Historian's note: From this point on, the interview was on 'deep background', a journalistic term that means it is for the reporter's information only and cannot be published nor referred to even obliquely in published material. Macet did not include it in the official notes that were submitted to his editors, although he evidently passed it on verbally to authorities within the Cardassian Republic as a favor to Prelate Spock. The information, therefore, comes from Skrain Macet's personal notes rather than the official transcript.)

Spock: You asked, Mr. Macet, if I believed the situation on Vulcan will change in the near future. Am I correct?

Macet: Yes. Um, yes, I think so. Among other things.

Spock: The answer to that question is 'no'.

Macet: I turned off the notePADD for this?

Spock: I believe the situation on Vulcan already has changed. Or rather, I believe something has already happened that is beginning the process of changing the situation on Vulcan.

Macet: And that would be?

Spock: Bajor, Mr. Macet. The new factor in galactic politics is Bajor and Cardassia's success there.

You also asked what Vulcan wants from the Empire. I suspect that you didn't really expect an answer, but I'm going to give you one anyway.

What Vulcan wants from the Empire, Mr. Macet, is its freedom. If Bajor is liberated from the Empire, it could show other worlds the way - the road to liberty.

You appear somewhat startled, Mr. Macet. I wonder why?

Macet: I am more than 'somewhat' startled, Prelate. Vulcan has been a part of the Empire for more than 200 years! Your family has been part of the ruling body that entire time. You are part Terran yourself!

Spock: All that, while true, is immaterial. What gave you the impression, Mr. Macet, that I would be forever content to jump when the Emperor says 'jump'? Or that Vulcans would be willing to remain a subjugated and oppressed people forever? Such suppositions are most illogical, Mr. Macet.


* * * * *
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Old November 1 2009, 12:03 AM   #3
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

* * * * *

Historian’s note: The following is the transcript of one of the most infamous speeches in modern political history.

In 2368 the twice-decorated Imperial Commander Sir Benjamin Sisko made what came to be known as one of the most shocking broadcasts in the history of the Quadrant. In it, the Imperial officer announced the creation of the Interstellar Liberation Front (ILF) and his personal defection from the Terran Empire.

Commander Sisko was one of the Heroes of the Empire, a former member of the Imperial Guard and a noted Starship commander and tactician. He played a leading role in the war against the Klingon Regency and was personally knighted by the late Emperor...

Benjamin Sisko finally met his end at the final battle of the Bajoran Liberation when his flagship, Defiance, was destroyed by the Imperial Guard.
He would go down in history as one of the most influential individuals in both the Empire and the Coalition. Indeed to many on Bajor he is known as The Sisko and remains a figure of much prophecy and legend. It is often said by those who believe this mythology that The Sisko will return to lead Bajor to a new golden age...




"Peoples of the Empire, my name is Ben Sisko and I am a Commander in our noble Imperial Guard...or rather I was a commander in what is actually a tool of oppression and terror which has been used to plunge our galaxy into bloody darkness.

I stand before you a changed man who has come to realise the truth of our once-great Empire, a truth that has gone unnoticed for far too long. The Empire that we have all served so loyally is not the strong and worthy entity and our beloved Emperor is not the brilliant and caring Father that we all thought he was. Instead we are ruled by corrupt and weak tyrants who have led us into a series of disastrous wars and occupations that have cost us the lives of our brave soldiers. The righteous hatred for humanity amongst the rest of the quadrant is our lasting and real legacy to the universe.

Well, no more!

As of this day I and the crews of the Tenth Fleet henceforth renounce our Terran Citizenship and pledge to end the tyranny of the Empire. We shall join with our brothers and sisters on Bajor in their struggle for freedom and with the heroic warriors of the Cardassian Republic in its just and noble war with the foul Terran Empire. We shall not stop until the freedoms that were stolen from the peoples of Bajor, Vulcan and Earth itself are restored to the people, and we shall use any means necessary at our disposal to achieve that end.

Today is the drawn of a new era of hope and liberty for all those who have suffered in the dark, who toil in the concentration camps that infest the occupied worlds, and for those like my son Jake, daring in their resolve to challenge the evils of tyrants who face death or worse on a daily basis. In his memory and in the memory of all those who have lost everything, we will raise our banner of freedom high and fight to end the Empire. I urge you all to join us!

Long live freedom and justice and long live the free peoples of our great galaxy!"
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Old November 1 2009, 02:14 AM   #4
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

Interesting! Are all sections posted yet?
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Old November 1 2009, 05:11 AM   #5
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

Yep, that's it. That's all we had time to write, really.

Edit: I'm not sure I said that very clearly. These three sections are complete, but if we had more time, we could have written more sections. The idea is to tell the story using different kinds of historical documents and records (Thor's idea), and here we've got three of them.

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Old November 1 2009, 04:40 PM   #6
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

First of all: Congratulations on publishing your first fan fic, Kate! I hope you'll stay around.


Now to the story:

The concept you've chosen is intriguing and original. It gives your universe great depth and scope. And I'd like to read more about that universe.
However, I'm not sure whether your idea really fits within the tight constraints of this challenge, length-wise. I feel that even with a word limit of 7000 words, it's almost impossible to write anything remotely epic. I think it would serve much better as an anthology of sorts.

I had my problems with the introductory part of the story because things like that:

Loki Dukat wrote: View Post
What is known and generally agreed upon by most respected commentators is that the abundant natural resources of Bajor provided a key criterion for annexation especially in light of the Empire’s war with the Klingon Regency and the Tzenkethi Hegemony. However what is also widely known is that after several decades of strip mining, said resources were depleted, resulting in the Empire maintaining a horrendously expensive occupation for no logical purpose or gain. Former Prelate Spock has theorised that...

The shocking and unexpected decision by the Castellan of the Cardassian Fourth Republic to commit his forces to the liberation of Bajor represented a seismic shift in Alpha Quadrant politics. In his declaration of war, Enabran Tain promised to ‘bring light into the galaxy after the cloak of darkness that has obscured liberty’. A wise and beloved leader, Tain is perhaps most famous for...

The Interstellar Resistance League (IRL) was founded in 2368 with the shocking defection of Commander Benjamin Sisko from the Imperial Guard. It was made up of cells on many Imperial Occupied worlds and acted as a fulcrum for acts of guerrilla warfare against the Guard. Its most notable success was the destruction of...
...took me right out of it as the text appeared to not be finished. It destroyed the illusion of reading a history book of the future for me.

The interview with Spock is great. I could hear him say all those things and I must say the characterisation was spot on. Macet as nervours reporter was a nice treat, too.
You also managed quite skillfully to tell a lot of the backstory and the story itself just by inserting all those little hints and details in what Spock says.

Sisko's speech is great, too, quite inspiring. I also liked the hint at his motivation in the end, though I feel sorry for Jake and him.

Well, I wish there was more. I hope you continue this story.
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Old November 1 2009, 05:11 PM   #7
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

I kinda noticed the same thing with the ellipses as well--it made me think there were missing pieces, whereas if they'd been left as periods I would've had the feeling I was reading a report that was meant to be a quick summary.

That said, there seemed to be a lot of interesting stuff here! When people REALLY flesh out the Mirror Universe, instead of going the way DS9 did and turning it into a farce (yes--let this be an example to certain people, I AM capable of criticizing my favorite Trek when it deserves it!), it can be a very engaging read.

Now, I was very curious about something--is this "Skrain Macet" person the alternate of Skrain Dukat, Akellen Macet, or is he someone who was never born in the canon timeline at all?
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Old November 1 2009, 05:57 PM   #8
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

I didn't even pick up on the 'wrong' first name.
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Old November 2 2009, 12:44 AM   #9
Thor Damar
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

Thanks for the comments guys.

I can see why the breaks in the narrative seem quite jarring and in retrospect I did get a bit carried away. There were several events and identities that I wanted to keep enigmatic but I can see how distracting it can be.

It is my hope that this universe can be further developed and become the epic that it deserves to be. As for Skrain Macet, he is a non-canonical character but he has several famous relatives(including his father).
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Old November 2 2009, 02:25 AM   #10
PSGarak
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

I'm glad I waited until I had a little sleep under my belt before taking this on. It was really interesting and deserved full attention. I have to add that the ellipses confused me a bit and made me feel that I wasn't reading a complete account. However, what I liked a great deal was the interview and the whole concept of a story being told through records and documents. That was quite novel and grabbed my attention. I, too, would love to see further installments. This AU is intriguing. Well done, both of you!
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Old November 2 2009, 03:20 PM   #11
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

Aw, thanks, guys. We had a lot of fun writing it, although I have to say that collaborating isn't easy, and it's particularly not easy when you live several thousand miles apart. If I had to guess at the number of times when I said to myself, "Jeez, I'd just like to pick up the phone and call him," my guess would be "a bajillion."

And it was particularly not easy for poor Thor who had to work with somebody who hasn't written fiction in a couple decades (and not a whole lot before that - I've been an non-fiction writer for a looooooong time now).

Which reminds me: I think I'm going to start a thread asking folks for their experiences in collaboration. I'd love to know how others managed it...or didn't manage it.

As for our reporter's name, we decided pretty early on we wanted him to be a Cardassian, but we didn't settle on a name until just a few days before the deadline. So we mostly called him "Bob." Really.

"Skrain Macet" is a deliberate attempt to appeal to Nerys' imagination.

But yeah, he's not supposed to be a AMU version of a canonical character, although I would not dissuade you from assuming that we have all "met" his father before. He's supposed to be an ambitious, idealistic, eager-beaver young reporter - not quite a cub reporter, but not too far removed from that.

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Old November 2 2009, 05:46 PM   #12
Nerys Ghemor
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

I'd say his dad's got to be Akellen Macet. If his dad were Dukat, I think he wouldn't be stumbling around quite as bad (verbally) in front of Spock!
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Old November 2 2009, 06:57 PM   #13
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

We thought about making him a Dukat, but decided, "Nah. Too easy." That's part of the reason why he was "Bob" for so long, really.

But anyway, even if he were Skrain Dukat's son (which he's not), just because his dad has a way with words or with anything else, that doesn't mean the son would have the same facility. My dad could add up figures in his head far quicker than I could do so on a calculator, but alas, this isn't a skill I inherited.

You mustn't think too badly of him for his verbal fumbling. He's a financial reporter getting his first shot at covering a war, and he's got to interview Spock. He's in waaaaaaaay over his head, in other words.

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Old November 2 2009, 07:29 PM   #14
Deranged Nasat
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

That was very interesting. The interview with Spock was a really well-written piece, and the character came across wonderfully. He had real presence and the dry humour provoked a few chuckles from me, certainly. The thing is, I enjoyed that interview so much that the other sections- which were pretty interesting in their own right but not as well fleshed out- seemed a bit superfluous. In my humble opinion, if you simply used the interview segment on its own, the story would work at least as well, possibly better. The idea of an anthology of varied accounts is really great, but perhaps a little too ambitious? One little slice of the history, though- particularly one as engaging as Spock's interview- would serve perfectly alone. However, you said you wanted to expand this universe- that would be great. Outside the limits of the challenge, you could really expand this into something very, very good. If you can make other segments as good as the Spock-Macet section, this will be very impressive!

At the risk of numbing you with my repetitiveness, this was really good, TD and JK! I very much enjoyed it.
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Old November 2 2009, 09:20 PM   #15
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Re: October challenge entry: Vassals and Rebels

I have to go with what's been said-The Spock piece was great and, with fleshing out, the Sisko piece could really fly. The beginning was...frustrating. nevertheless, I want to read more about this universe. Please don't just let it drop.
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