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Go Back   The Trek BBS > Star Trek TV Series > Deep Space Nine

Deep Space Nine What We Left Behind, we will always have here.

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Old July 13 2014, 01:06 AM   #1
Smellincoffee
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DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!

Welcome back everyone, and continuing onward with the countdown, this week is Dr. Julian Bashir - or, as he's known in his holodeck fantasies, Very Special Agent Julian Bashir.

But first -- last week's winners!



Triskelion wrote: View Post

Dax: I'm sensing discomfort.
Kang: You're a Trill, not a Betazoid.
Dax: In that case get moving or I'll gut you like a targ, urinate on your corpse and then go kick some ridged Klingon ass myself.
Kang: Oh for a happy medium with females in this century.
LeadHead wrote: View Post

(Ezri fires the gun)
Ezri: It's just been revoked.
Joran: You know, he really didn't set you up for that line Ezri.
JirinPanthosa wrote: View Post

DAX: Captain's log. Really tired after last night. Since Worf is recovering in the infirmary, he left me in control of the bridge.

Schistocerca wrote: View Post
[


Dax's annual performance review took an unexpected direction!
This week's shapeshifting award:

Nerys Myk wrote: View Post

DAX: It damn well better be "period accurate"! I spent ten hours weaving my hair into this style!
And, last but not least:

Triskelion wrote: View Post

Sisko: You know, the first interracial kiss hasn't happened yet. Want to make history?
Dax: You bet I do. Where's Uhura?


And now, this week's batch! Fire at will.











(Relax, Julian, "fire" is a metaphor..)
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DS9 CapCon #114: ...thaaaat's not a *good* sound...
"The more they overthink the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drain.." - Commander Montgomery Scott.
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Old July 13 2014, 01:44 AM   #2
JirinPanthosa
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!

tftw!



DATA: Nobody has ever asked me if my hair...grows.
BASHIR: You see, TNG fans? I'm an intriguing character. Wouldn't you like to tune in and see me and all the other intriguing characters on DS9? Please? I know it's not that exciting so far, but trust me on this one, seven years later you'll think it's the greatest show ever. And besides, you're TNG fans, what are you doing judging a show based on the first few episodes? Seriously though, PLEASE TUNE BACK IN!!!



BASHIR: Ahh yes, the wine. This particular selection is...red. It's a particularly good vintage, which nicely accentuates the accents of...red grapes. Damn it, I need to do more research on wine.



DOCTOR: That's it! I'm submitting you to the holographic rights committee!
BASHIR: Aren't they lost in the Delta Quadrant?
DOCTOR: That's just their current headquarters. In 70 years you'll be sorry you crossed them!
ZIMMERMAN: Sorry, I accidentally programmed the Mark One to think it's sentient.
BASHIR: No problem at all.



BASHIR: And you seriously think Section 31 is going to win the war for the Federation? Even if you're super-corrupt and think Federation principles are stupid, I've never seen such ridiculous overly complex plans in all my life.
ADMIRAL: Yeah, we have a spy in their organization. Pretty much all they do is murder people now and then and grandstand about ends justify the means crap.
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Old July 13 2014, 11:44 PM   #3
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!



EMH's Log: Barclay took me on a trip to Deep Space Nine since I still have a week before I have to be sent back to Voyager. He wanted to show me the Mark 4 along with the Doctor they based it on. Tom Paris is mature and civilized compared to those two...
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Old July 14 2014, 12:19 AM   #4
Nerys Myk
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!



DATA: Tag said twenty dollars.

BASHIR: Its a mistake, two hundred dollars.

DATA: Tag said twenty dolllars.
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Old July 14 2014, 03:30 AM   #5
Nerys Myk
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!



EMH: I could have had a full head of hair!
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Old July 14 2014, 04:08 AM   #6
LeadHead
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!

Thanks for the win!



Data: I am sorry, but use of the sickbay is limited to ships medical personnel.

Bashir: You're not medical personnel.

Data: Intriguing. Fine, I didn't see you if you didn't see me.



Bashir: Sparkling wine? We couldn't get real Champagne?!



EMH: Am I being replaced?

Zimmerman: Not at all. Initiating hair transplant from LMH to EMH.



Ross: Four tens...

Medical Log: For some reason Admiral Ross has been near catatonic for several hours, calling himself "Murtagh" and musing about four tens. I am going to run a search for ti "Urkel" he mentioned at one point.
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Old July 14 2014, 04:42 AM   #7
Nerys Myk
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!



BOND: One should never settle for a cheap imitation.

BASHIR: He's not talking about the wine, is he?
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Old July 14 2014, 01:08 PM   #8
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!

Thank you for the win

After an awkward few moments Julian realised that he had misheard her original request: "Oh you said you want to take this bottle and fill my GLASS with it"
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Old July 14 2014, 01:12 PM   #9
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!


Data: And you spent how much?
Julian: 200 thousand credits.
Data: And he told you what?
Julian: That it would cure all ills known to man!
Data: You do know it is just a toaster oven?
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Old July 14 2014, 04:12 PM   #10
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!


After a hard day working in sickbay Julian liked to unwind with an hour spent admiring his own reflection
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Old July 15 2014, 01:40 PM   #11
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!


Despite his immense intelligence Julian could never work out why he was always found first when playing hide and seek!


The Doctor had a sudden Eureka moment; at last there would be a way to stop the Delaney sisters fighting over which of their dates was the cutest!
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Old July 19 2014, 01:32 PM   #12
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!


Bashir: Bloodwine? In 20th century Earth? ..
WORRRRRFFFFFF!
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DS9 CapCon #114: ...thaaaat's not a *good* sound...
"The more they overthink the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drain.." - Commander Montgomery Scott.
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Old July 20 2014, 08:36 AM   #13
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!



Picardo: What do you mean Voyager doesn't get to use the new uniforms?!
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Old July 23 2014, 04:27 AM   #14
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!


Bashir: It's time for your annual physical, admiral, whether you like it or NOT.
Ross: On second thought, maybe I will greenlight Sisko's plan to retake Deep Space Nine.
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"The more they overthink the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drain.." - Commander Montgomery Scott.
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Old July 23 2014, 05:18 AM   #15
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Re: DS9 Caption Contest 97: Julian Bashir, Secret Agent Man!



Bashir: Sparkling cider? What the?

Computer: If you wish to replace this with an alcoholic beverage, you must pay Quark an additional 3 slips of latinum.

Bashir: $&%#!
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