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Old February 15 2014, 12:19 AM   #61
RoJoHen
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

Emher wrote: View Post
thestrangequark wrote: View Post
21. No farting. Have the decency to leave the room or silence a non-stinker
Todays Trek BBS top tip: matches. One thing we learned when me, my brother and my cousin where all three bachelors with not the best eating habits in the world (mine and bros habits have since considerably improved) living together, we sort of realized that it was inevitable that someone would let one off when we where hanging out on evenings in front of the TV. Hence, we learned to keep matches on the table. Whenever someone expelled some gas, he'd light a match and then extinguish it a moment later to cover the smell. Works wonders and saves your nose.

Or you just let the smell linger. Because it's funnier.
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Old February 15 2014, 12:55 AM   #62
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

1. Should be nice.

2. Should be pretty.

3. Should have a cat.

4. Must not be socially conservative.

5. Must not be chirpy, bubbly, or "mad".

6. Should be passionate about music or the visual arts, doesn't matter which or what kind.

7. Preferably not teetotal, rabidly anti-drugs, or vegetarian. There's wiggle room though, depending on how one shapes up on rules 1 - 6.
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Old February 15 2014, 09:17 AM   #63
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

I'd drop #2. It changes with time anyway. I rather have an ugly man whith a kind heart than an egoitistical Adonis.

I apparently disagree with many posters here on the "respect everyone" rule. In my book disrespect must be earned, not the other way round.
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Old February 15 2014, 10:50 AM   #64
Emher
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

RoJoHen wrote: View Post
Emher wrote: View Post
thestrangequark wrote: View Post
21. No farting. Have the decency to leave the room or silence a non-stinker
Todays Trek BBS top tip: matches. One thing we learned when me, my brother and my cousin where all three bachelors with not the best eating habits in the world (mine and bros habits have since considerably improved) living together, we sort of realized that it was inevitable that someone would let one off when we where hanging out on evenings in front of the TV. Hence, we learned to keep matches on the table. Whenever someone expelled some gas, he'd light a match and then extinguish it a moment later to cover the smell. Works wonders and saves your nose.

Or you just let the smell linger. Because it's funnier.
Difference between Americans and Swedes: we don't really find farts funny most of the time.
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Old February 15 2014, 11:21 AM   #65
RJDonner&Blitzen
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

^^ My Swedish ancestry definitely shows in that respect.

Good list, Pingfah. Mine would be similar.

Rhubarbodendron wrote: View Post
I apparently disagree with many posters here on the "respect everyone" rule. In my book disrespect must be earned, not the other way round.
Well, I do give people the benefit of the doubt right off the bat, but there are definitely people I don't respect.
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Old February 15 2014, 12:03 PM   #66
Gov Kodos
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

Emher wrote: View Post
RoJoHen wrote: View Post
Emher wrote: View Post
Todays Trek BBS top tip: matches. One thing we learned when me, my brother and my cousin where all three bachelors with not the best eating habits in the world (mine and bros habits have since considerably improved) living together, we sort of realized that it was inevitable that someone would let one off when we where hanging out on evenings in front of the TV. Hence, we learned to keep matches on the table. Whenever someone expelled some gas, he'd light a match and then extinguish it a moment later to cover the smell. Works wonders and saves your nose.

Or you just let the smell linger. Because it's funnier.
Difference between Americans and Swedes: we don't really find farts funny most of the time.
Lutfisk, that's all I have to say.
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Old February 15 2014, 02:21 PM   #67
An Officer
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

A practicing believer in God would be the sum total of my list. That sorts out concerns about manners, respect, gentleness, charitability, and whether the person genuinely from the heart wants to do good, or is simply trying to impress those around him, or inflating his own ego. It also takes care of concerns regarding materialism/individualism, in that the spiritual life and character and good actions become the primary focus. This type of essence makes a person more trustworthy, reliable, and strong, in all areas of life. And it becomes possible to work together towards success in the next life, not just this one.
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Last edited by An Officer; February 15 2014 at 02:42 PM.
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Old February 15 2014, 04:36 PM   #68
Pingfah
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

Erm... what?
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Old February 15 2014, 04:39 PM   #69
Chemahkuu
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

Pingfah wrote: View Post
Erm... what?
Apparently we can't genuinely be good, honest or caring without being religious.
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Old February 15 2014, 04:42 PM   #70
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

@AnOfficer: How you doin'? *straightens tie*
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Old February 15 2014, 04:46 PM   #71
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

Chemahkuu wrote: View Post
Pingfah wrote: View Post
Erm... what?
Apparently we can't genuinely be good, honest or caring without being religious.
Well, she doesn't actually say that, although it might be reasonably inferred.

She does seem to think that being a believer in God (any apparently) guarantees that you will be those things though, which obviously is breathtakingly deluded nonsense.
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Old February 15 2014, 04:54 PM   #72
An Officer
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

Not a guarantee, I'm well acquainted with the imperfections of life, it is simply a preferred starting point for me, personally. Some people like twinkling eyes or a lovely tall figure... piety, for me, is infinitely attractive.
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Old February 15 2014, 05:00 PM   #73
An Officer
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

Mr. Laser Beam wrote: View Post
@AnOfficer: How you doin'? *straightens tie*
I didn't realise baseball was a religion!
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Old February 15 2014, 07:40 PM   #74
Rķu rķu, chķu
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

^ Oh, don't worry, it's not. I cheer for teams; I worship God.
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Last edited by Rķu rķu, chķu; February 15 2014 at 09:26 PM.
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Old February 15 2014, 09:18 PM   #75
thestrangequark
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Re: list of boyfriend rules

Emher wrote: View Post
Difference between Americans and Swedes: we don't really find farts funny most of the time.
I actually do think they're funny. There is a fabulous quote: "You don't have to be smart to laugh at a fart, but you'd have to be stupid not to." Part of their charm is that they are a breech in etiquette, though, and so maintaining that etiquette 99% of the time is important!

An Officer wrote: View Post
A practicing believer in God would be the sum total of my list. That sorts out concerns about manners, respect, gentleness, charitability, and whether the person genuinely from the heart wants to do good, or is simply trying to impress those around him, or inflating his own ego. It also takes care of concerns regarding materialism/individualism, in that the spiritual life and character and good actions become the primary focus. This type of essence makes a person more trustworthy, reliable, and strong, in all areas of life. And it becomes possible to work together towards success in the next life, not just this one.
An Officer wrote: View Post
Not a guarantee, I'm well acquainted with the imperfections of life, it is simply a preferred starting point for me, personally. Some people like twinkling eyes or a lovely tall figure... piety, for me, is infinitely attractive.
You are a very nice person, An Officer, so I don't think you meant to be unkind or prejudiced in your post. I also understand why worldview is important for a lot of people when finding a partner, so I don't begrudge you at all your requirement that someone be of similar religiosity to you. I think it would be hard for me to date someone who was not atheist or agnostic, even though I have many friends of varying kinds and degrees of religiosity. I may be wrong, but I just don't know that I could spend my life and my intimacy with someone who saw the world drastically differently to me.

That being said, try reading back what you wrote from the perspective of a non-believer. You've explicitly stated that manners, respect, gentleness, charity, trustworthiness, reliability, and strength are all given if a person is a believer (which is patently untrue), and implied that all these things are lacking in non-believers. Implying too, that nonbelievers do good only to impress others or inflate their own ego.
Do you see how, well...horrible that is? If someone wrote all that about believers, and you read it, how would it make you feel?

None of those qualities are dependent upon belief, and there's loads of research showing that non-believers are just as law-abiding, generous, cheritable, trustworthy, etc. as believers are. There are plenty who would argue that it is the non-believer who does good for the sake of doing good, and the believer who does good only for reward or fear of punishment...how does that make you feel? Personally, I don't agree with that argument, but I understand why people make it: It gets exhausting being told you're a bad person just because you don't believe in god, however indirectly that telling is done. Even though I don't think you're an outright prejudiced person, it seems you have some underlying assumptions about non-believers that are wrong, and that are informing your opinion of them. Maybe you could examine them again, bearing in mind that we are just like you--the only difference is that we don't believe in god, and that's not as big a difference as you think it is.
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