RSS iconTwitter iconFacebook icon

The Trek BBS title image

The Trek BBS statistics

Threads: 137,839
Posts: 5,327,327
Members: 24,551
Currently online: 557
Newest member: Mycroft

TrekToday headlines

Latest Official Starships Collection Ships
By: T'Bonz on Jul 10

Seven of Nine Bobble Head
By: T'Bonz on Jul 9

Pegg The Prankster
By: T'Bonz on Jul 9

More Trek Stars Join Unbelievable!!!!!
By: T'Bonz on Jul 8

Star Trek #35 Preview
By: T'Bonz on Jul 8

New ThinkGeek Trek Apparel
By: T'Bonz on Jul 7

Star Trek Movie Prop Auction
By: T'Bonz on Jul 7

Drexler: NX Engineering Room Construction
By: T'Bonz on Jul 7

New Trek Home Fashions
By: T'Bonz on Jul 4

Star Trek Pop-Ups Book Preview
By: T'Bonz on Jul 3


Welcome! The Trek BBS is the number one place to chat about Star Trek with like-minded fans. Please login to see our full range of forums as well as the ability to send and receive private messages, track your favourite topics and of course join in the discussions.

If you are a new visitor, join us for free. If you are an existing member please login below. Note: for members who joined under our old messageboard system, please login with your display name not your login name.


Go Back   The Trek BBS > Star Trek TV Series > Voyager

Voyager There's coffee in this forum!

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools
Old June 17 2013, 10:05 PM   #1
Ln X
Fleet Captain
 
Ln X's Avatar
 
Location: The great gig in the sky
VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship

Apologies for the delays, exams and revision got in the way but they're by the by! So onto our next contest!



JanewayRulz! wrote: View Post


Very few crewmembers on Voyager knew it, but Captain Janeway paid for her replacement photon torpedos with her part time job as a Delta Quadrant chiropracter
JirinPanthosa wrote: View Post


PARIS: Do we really have to completely forgive him by the next episode?
CHAKOTAY: That's the rules.
Ryva Brall wrote: View Post

Torres: Damn. Looks like the Infinite Improbability Drive has gone offline again.
Tuvok: Impossible.
Torres: No, just very, very improbable.
Finn wrote: View Post


You know we would have had Paris and Torres as zombies if Voyager was on the air today
R. Star wrote: View Post


Janeway: It's my flesh eating piranha tank. Bring Harry down here, we'll test how well this works out.
And the special award...



Triskelion wrote: View Post


Torres: Now that I'm your Pon Farr booty call, we can reset your relationship status on Spacebook.

Tuvok:
Is there any way to see that Vorik gets the message?

Torres: Yeah. I'll poke him. With a mek'leth.
Congratulations to the winners, and also nice to see some new faces to!

The next pictures up for captioning are...











Have fun!
__________________
Star Trek: The Approaching Shadow...

Caption contest: DS9
Ln X is offline  
Old June 17 2013, 10:15 PM   #2
Ln X
Fleet Captain
 
Ln X's Avatar
 
Location: The great gig in the sky
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship


Janeway: -so I've fallen in love with this ship's first officer and I don't know whether to be aloof like a good captain should be, or ask him out for a date. What do I do Tuvok?
Tuvok: Logic would suggest revealing to Commander Chakotay how you feel, however under the circumstances that is not possible.
Janeway: Why?
Tuvok: He's behind you captain.

A long silence follows...


Seven: You improved astrometrics sensor range by precisely 3.141- Exactly pi percent, impressive captain.
Janeway: Consider it a birthday present Seven!



Seven: May I ask why you are babysitting?
Tom: B'Elanna kicked me out of our quarters, she said I wasn't mature enough to be a parent. So now I've got to spend the next month with Naomi and Flotter...


Seven: A Romulan could do a better job organising this junk.
Torres: You-
Seven: A joke to lighten the situation.


Harry: Ugh bad day today...
Tom: Cheer up Harry, Neelix is sick so...
__________________
Star Trek: The Approaching Shadow...

Caption contest: DS9
Ln X is offline  
Old June 17 2013, 11:47 PM   #3
JirinPanthosa
Commodore
 
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship



JANEWAY: Look. This planet has a drink almost identical to coffee, but even richer and darker!
TUVOK: That may be so, but it would be illogical to trade all our dilithium for...
JANEWAY: Too late.



CHAKOTAY: I'm glad Seven has become a member of the crew, but why did you put her in that outfit?
JANEWAY: To torture Kim.
KIM: Uhhh....



TOM: You can never tell Sam that Naomi broke into my liquor stash.
SEVEN: Where are you taking her?
TOM: To sickbay. After the Doctor cures her hangover I need you to erase his memory of it.
SEVEN: I'm not sure you've thought all this through.



B'ELANA: And then I found the two of them in the cargo bay.
JANEWAY: Can someone please find a time anomaly so we can reset this romance?



Tom and Harry in the moooorning!
JirinPanthosa is offline  
Old June 17 2013, 11:59 PM   #4
R. Star
Rear Admiral
 
R. Star's Avatar
 
Location: Shangri-La
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship

Thanks for the win!



Janeway: So... I hear your pon farr is coming up... (get it?).. next month.
Tuvok: We do not discuss it withoutsiders.
Janeway: Nothing to discuss. I'll see to alllllll your needs. For the good of your health... totally for that.
Chakotay: (cries)



Chakotay: (thinking) I'd tap that.
Janeway: (thinking) I'd tap that.
Kim: (thinking) I just had an accident.
Seven: (thinking) Why is everyone staring at me?



Tom: I thought I'd be happy when Neelix left the ship.



Seven: I want a uniform. I'm tired of the lustful looks from Ensign Kim, the Doctor, your first officer... you. I'm also tired of the jealous looks of hatred from Lieutenant Torres.
Torres: Don't worry, I'll still hate you if you get a uniform.



Paris: Behold! I who am an expert pilot, a field medic, can design and build a ship that goes infinite, commando, fighter, lover, history expert... have now taken up art. Look at my first masterpiece, a more lifelike version of Harry Kim carved from the most dense alien wood in the Delta Quadrant!
__________________
"I was never a Star Trek fan." J.J. Abrams
R. Star is offline  
Old June 18 2013, 04:58 AM   #5
Triskelion
Rear Admiral
 
Triskelion's Avatar
 
Location: \,,/. ▷\✦_✦ L L + P
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship

TFTW Ln X!



Janes: This one time, at band camp.....




Chaks: Now program the crew's recreational hologram with your physical attributes, Seven.
Janes: But make her...warm for our forms.
Kims: No! Keep her cold as ice.
Seven: And a riding crop?
All: Yes!




Paris: After we put Naomi to bed I'll show you my holoprogram, "How Treevis Got His Wood Back."




Chaks: Can I be frank with you?
Seven: Yes.
Chaks: ♪ ♫ Fly me to the moon, let me play....♪ ♫ ♩ ♬
B'Elanna: Oh just buy her a lobster, she'll put out.




Paris: How do you make a Bajoran stew?
Kims: I don't know?
Paris: Tell her the Occupation was a myth.
Triskelion is offline  
Old June 18 2013, 11:37 PM   #6
BirdInJetstream
Lieutenant Commander
 
BirdInJetstream's Avatar
 
Location: Jetstream
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship


Tuvok: "Fascinating! I already tried 47 different algorithms to solve the problem. None of them were successful. How did you do it?"
Janeway: "See that little switch? I had Torres install it before your shift started. Press it 5 seconds, shut down, reboot..."
__________________
"Life improves the capacity of the environment to sustain life." - P. Kynes
BirdInJetstream is offline  
Old June 19 2013, 01:19 AM   #7
ncc71877
Fleet Captain
 
ncc71877's Avatar
 
Location: Texas Panhandle of Earth 2
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship



Seven: "With all respect to the Commander, I don't see how getting high and trying to talk to an imaginary goat will solve anything."

ncc71877
ncc71877 is offline  
Old June 19 2013, 04:59 PM   #8
Ln X
Fleet Captain
 
Ln X's Avatar
 
Location: The great gig in the sky
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship


Tom: So bypassing the gel packs would be a shortcut to-
Kim: Mushrooms!

__________________
Star Trek: The Approaching Shadow...

Caption contest: DS9
Ln X is offline  
Old June 19 2013, 05:58 PM   #9
LeadHead
Director of Comedy
 
LeadHead's Avatar
 
Location: Either in the Sirius Sector Block or on the Normandy SR-2
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship



Janeway: Just do me a favor, let Chakotay work out of here for awhile. I need the command area to myself for awhile. (under her breath) Jerk keeps using MY side of the console.




Seven: Computations are complete, Captain. It is mathematically impossible that Ensign Kim will ever make Lieutenant.



Paris: Why did you make her cry? She looks up to you.

Seven: I simply informed her that her Flotter holoprograms are infantile and that they will inevitably lead to her becoming an individual with less intelligence and reduced chances of a prosperous future.

Naomi: (tears)

Paris: Note to self: Never let Seven Babysit when B'Elanna and I have a baby.



Seven: ... And then I told Lieutenant Torres that it was "A good day to finally become a competent Engineer."




Paris: Ah, man. Now the service here is worse than the food!

Kim: Impossible.
__________________
Thanks to Nerys Myk for my awesome avatar!

Check out the Caption contests in the TOS, TNG and Movies I-X forums!
LeadHead is offline  
Old June 19 2013, 08:25 PM   #10
Triskelion
Rear Admiral
 
Triskelion's Avatar
 
Location: \,,/. ▷\✦_✦ L L + P
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship



Toms: After we put Naomi to bed I can show you my holoprogram "Fast & Furious 6 volume 392."
Sevs: Is that the one with the Vulcan Rock?
Toms: No you're thinking of 6 volume 287. This one has the original Rock.




Tommy: How do you make a Talaxian ale?
Kimmy: I don't know?
Tommy: Get his Ocampan girlfriend to dump him.
Triskelion is offline  
Old June 21 2013, 11:08 AM   #11
Bry_Sinclair
Commodore
 
Bry_Sinclair's Avatar
 
Location: Along the border of Talarian space
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship


Janeway: We've got to find a way to get around these AOTW!
Tuvok: I am running a full tactical analysis, Captain. It will take some time though.
Chakotay: I have an idea--
Janeway: Quiet you! You know what happens when you make fun of my latest hair do. Now stand in the corner and think about what you said!


Janeway: It's so nice to have this place to ourselves, Seven.
Chakotay: Um, hello.
Janeway: Oh, Commander. I never noticed you.
Chakotay: I'm standing right next to Seven!
Janeway: You were in her shadow.
Kim: Hi.
Janeway: What was that?


Paris: See I told you I was the resident ladies man. See how easily I pick up chicks.


Chakotay: So ladies, why don't you slip out of those restrictive outfits and rub each other down with this baby oil.
Janeway: Chakotay, we're in the cargo bay not the holodeck.
Chakotay: I know.


Paris: Quick Harry, for once Seven isn't hogging the scene, it's your turn to shine!
Kim: Umm...huh? Do what now?
Paris: [groans] Well I tried.
__________________
Avatar: Captain Susanna Leijten, U.S.S. Silverfin NCC-4470, Border Service Third Cutter Squadron
Manip by: FltCpt. Bossco (STPMA)
Bry_Sinclair is offline  
Old June 21 2013, 03:33 PM   #12
Nerys Myk
Fleet Admiral
 
Nerys Myk's Avatar
 
Location: House of Kang, now with ridges
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship



SEVEN: I wont be going to the ship's dance with either of you!

...or you Harry!!!




PARIS: If I ever find out who covered my uniform with superglue!!
__________________
The boring one, the one with Khan, the one where Spock returns, the one with whales, the dumb one, the last one, the one with Kirk, the one with the Borg, the stupid one, the bad one, the new one, the other one with Khan.
Nerys Myk is offline  
Old June 22 2013, 06:15 AM   #13
Triskelion
Rear Admiral
 
Triskelion's Avatar
 
Location: \,,/. ▷\✦_✦ L L + P
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship



Tom-Ass: How do you make a Vulcan meatloaf?
Harr: I don't know?
Tom-Ass: Don't bother. It's already loafing.
Triskelion is offline  
Old July 2 2013, 08:21 PM   #14
FFunctionalData
Lieutenant Commander
 
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship


Seven of 9: We are experiencing a malfunction in the Warp Core

B'Elanna: I have run every diagnostic and can not find the problem

Chakotay: Captain I believe if I go on a vision quest i can find out what is wrong let me get my..

Captain Janeway: Chakotay not every problem we encounter can be solved with a vision quest.
FFunctionalData is offline  
Old July 2 2013, 09:29 PM   #15
Finn
Vice Admiral
 
Finn's Avatar
 
Location: In the MetroWest
Re: VOY Caption Contest 109; A Small Ship



Harry: ...and I made it to second base with the Skarri girl we met at the pub last night!

Tom: Handshakes aren't second base

Harry: Damn it!
Finn is offline  
Closed Thread

Bookmarks

Tags
morn, voy, voyager

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump



All times are GMT +1. The time now is 07:19 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.6
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
FireFox 2+ or Internet Explorer 7+ highly recommended.