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Go Back   The Trek BBS > Star Trek TV Series > The Next Generation

The Next Generation All Good Things come to an end...but not here.

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Old April 3 2013, 07:03 AM   #1
LeadHead
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TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!

Hello everyone! Yeah, it's not saturday or Sunday, it's Tuesday and I'm very late. Sorry about that, between busy work and trips to the airport and long car rides, it's been a crazy time for yours truly. You've been quite patient, lets go!



First up to the plate, we have the "Crucial Technology" Award, going to:

R. Star wrote: View Post


Data: Note to self. Look up and install design schematics for 20th century technology known as a surge protector.
Next, we have the "Honest Advice" Award, going to:

Honorable Ensign wrote: View Post

Picard: Oh, great, she's doing that "sensing pain" thing again. Look, I won't blame you if you just switch to another channel for awhile.
Next, we have the "Mood Sufficiently Ruined" Award, going to:

shivkala wrote: View Post


Salia: So, what do you say, Wesley? You, me, my quarters, some soft music, me showing you the night of your life. Are you ready to get...

Guinan: Ice Cream! You can't leave, yet! You haven't had your ice cream! You know...to cool you down...

Wesley: Damn it, Guinan, your timing couldn't have been worse.

Guinan: I know...ah the things I do around here to entertain myself!
Next, we have the "Emergency Situation" Award, going to:

Jonas Grumby wrote: View Post


Tex: "See this little filly to my right? That's my wife. See that little filly in red who just came in? That's my girlfriend. Now, you can have either one you want, son, but I'll give you fifty dollars to get one of 'em out of here!"
Next, we have the "Tough Competition" Award, going to:

Danger Ace wrote: View Post


"Okay, Deanna rates you, Worf, a "7." You, Data, get an "8." I GET A "3" WITH "MOMMY ISSUES!""




The Laughing Vulcan wrote: View Post


Science Officer's personal log. Pursuant to the Captain's orders, when linked to the Iconian database, I downloaded the entire scientific, cultural, and historical database for the Iconian Empire. That took 3.561766 milliseconds, operating at my maximum throughput rate. Realising that I had sufficient time before reporting to the Captain, I then took it on myself to download the Iconian pornographic database. That took 18 minutes to download. It also installed several viruses, malware and trojans, severely compromising my operating system. The Captain is under the impression that it was a deliberate Iconian attack. I have chosen not to correct his assumption.
Our Photoshop Award, goes to:

Nerys Myk wrote: View Post


WES: And this is what I'll look like as an adult.

GUINAN: Don't believe him, honey. He'll look just the same, only with a cheesy beard to hide his weak chin.



Triskelion wrote: View Post


Guinan: Ah, young love. Cherish these moments before you find out what assholes you both are.
Congratulations to our winners and many thanks to everyone who participated! And now, rather than have the last contest go two weeks or have this one go a week and a half, this one will be a Lightning Round!

4 Days!

3 Pictures!

GO!







Enjoy!
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Old April 3 2013, 07:05 AM   #2
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!



Worf: You're late, again. One more time and old baldy makes me First Officer.



(Sorry to non Oakland A's Fans)

Picard: LETS GO OAKLAND!



Worf: Seriously, Doctor: You're not fooling anyone with the bigger lab coats and hiding behind bio beds. We know you're pregnant.
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Old April 3 2013, 08:03 AM   #3
R. Star
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!

Thanks for the win LeadHead!



Crusher: He's still mad at you?
Riker: I never thought he'd take the whoopie cushion in his chair at poker night so personally.
Crusher: Apparently flatulence is without honor in the Klingon Empire.



Picard: Here's to the finest captain in Starfleet!!!
Crewmen: .....
Picard: ...what?



Crusher: Welcome Mr. Worf! Five strips of latinum if you want a happy ending!
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Old April 3 2013, 08:53 AM   #4
Triskelion
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!

Woo Hoo! Thanks for the KBLA LeadHead! Q'Pla!



Riker: Crap! he saw me.

Crusher:
Why not just pay him the five dollars you bet him he could not beat you leg wrestling, Will?

Riker:
He sharted! The entire time!




If you gentlemen are done with Ensign Timmy I have a Captain's log that's not going to enter itself.




Worf: I might have known. They put the "Security" water fountain all the way down here.

Crusher:
Oooh, let's play Jenga!
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Old April 3 2013, 03:19 PM   #5
Mutai Sho-Rin
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!

[grumble, grumble, grumble] 'BOUT DAMN TIME [grumble, grumble, grumble]

*Said with a wink.*
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Old April 3 2013, 04:00 PM   #6
TommyR01D
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!



Beverly: Will, are you sure you know the way to sickbay?
Riker: (angrily) YES!
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Old April 3 2013, 05:21 PM   #7
Mr. Laser Beam
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!



Janeway: All right, Will, you know the drill. 500 credits. 600 and the redhead can watch.
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Old April 4 2013, 12:58 AM   #8
shivkala
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!

TFTW, Leadhead!



Worf: Commander, hold on, I need to get to engineering. Hold the door!

Riker: Sure thing.

Crusher: Hey, Will, let's hold it until he's right here, then we'll close it.

Riker: I like how you think, Doctor.



Picard: You know what we need? A good drinking song! Here's a classic: I get knocked down, but I get up again, you're never gonna keep me down, I get knocked down, but I get up again, you're never gonna keep me down...

Crusher: Pissing the night away, pissing the night away

Picard: He drinks a Whiskey drink, he drinks a Vodka drink, He drinks a Lager drink, he drinks a Cider drink, He sings the songs that remind him of the good times, He sings the songs that remind him of the better times



Crusher: That thing? Okay, I admit it, I have a Space-Bay problem. I just love winning useless junk in internet auctions!
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Old April 4 2013, 01:15 AM   #9
Jonas Grumby
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!

TFTW, LeadHead!



Crusher: "Yes, it's a tribble incubator. I know you Klingons don't like tribbles, but guess what? You're not the boss of me!"
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Old April 4 2013, 02:51 AM   #10
Nerys Myk
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!



CRUSHER: Yep, Worf knows you and Deanna hooked up last night.



Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink! Drink!

After waking up naked and in a pool of his own vomit for the second time, Picard decided that fraternizing with the crew was a bad idea.
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Old April 4 2013, 03:33 AM   #11
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!



Crusher: I put some gagh-flavored ones in there like you asked.
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Old April 4 2013, 04:53 AM   #12
Nerys Myk
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!



CRUSHER: The Triskelion ambassador just bet me 100 quatoos, that you'd show up asking about his gambling debts.
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The boring one, the one with Khan, the one where Spock returns, the one with whales, the dumb one, the last one, the one with Kirk, the one with the Borg, the stupid one, the bad one, the new one, the other one with Khan.
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Old April 4 2013, 05:45 AM   #13
Triskelion
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!



Crusher: Another customer come to see my foreskin collection.



Worf:<Shakes head>
Riker: Data's still on the bridge. Let's go have another martini.



Janeway: Pardon me, do you happen to have any Grey Poupon?
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Old April 4 2013, 05:55 AM   #14
Nerys Myk
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!



JANEWAY: Are you familiar with works of Aerosmith?
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Old April 4 2013, 10:14 AM   #15
Triskelion
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Re: TNG Caption This! 310: The Lightning Round!



Crusher: I'm...going to...set the...place on fire.....my red stapler....
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