VOY Caption This 93; Neutered...

[Ln X]

Janeway: You four have all the qualities of Neelix's leola root stew, and THAT is not a compliment!

[LeadHead]

Janeway: Welcome aboard Voyager. If you think that we're going to forget you or what you've done. You're absolutely right.




Chakotay: Nah, skip this one. It's a lame ale at best.



Doctor: His BRAIN is gone!




Paris: It's just whipped cream!

Tuvok: Is that a problem?

Paris: No, just making a note.




Chakotay: They used Legos to build this ship?!

[KarenLynn]

Mozzie wrote:

---

Doctor: His BRAIN is gone!

Tom Paris: ... how can you tell?

[Triskelion]

The first thing I need to tell you is that there is no regulation requiring new crewmembers to taste test the Chief of Security's plomeek. Is that understood?

<Tuvok grumbles>



Crewman: Captain, did you lose a watch on the bridge?
Janeway: Yeah, like five years ago. Did you find it?
Crewman: Yes. It was bundled inside these jockey shorts that say "Property of Tuvok." They appear to have been sucked into in this conduit.



Kim: Must you stare at us while we eat?
Neelix: It is a full service dining experience, gentlemen.
Kim: If you hate the owner, don't take it out on us, guy.
Paris: Besides if you spit in the food, you'll never be able to enjoy a meal out again. Believe me, I know.
Neelix: Oh? Did you spit in someone's food? And now that makes you wonder if you're eating spit? Would it help if I told you I spit in the food?
Paris: Whatever. <Continues eating>

[Bob Karo]

[QUOTE=Merry Christmas;7371643]

Rudolph the Red Nosed Vulcan wrote:

---

Janeway: "No one leaves until I find out who ate the strawberries."

Winner!

[LeadHead]

Janeway: I won't lie to you, the mission I'm about to send you on will be dangerous, but I don't know any of your names, so if you die... whatever.

[Gil T.Azell]

Thanks for the win..



Tuvok: "Is this Nelix's new soup?"
Chakotay: "Erm... Ewww, no his Bath water"
Tuvok: "Tuvok, to transporter room prepare for emergency beam out.. "

[Nerys Myk]

JANEWAY: One final note. I hate blondes. The day I give some blonde bimbo any sort of responsibility on this ship, is the day I should be shoved out of an airlock!

[Triskelion]

...Official music of the ship: Enya.
Official buffet is Tuesday's Fiesta Buffet.
Official nickname for Ensign Harry: Ensign Harry.
Official officer's latrine is off limits to all but Mister Tuvok and myself. The rest of you can go in Ensign Harry's quarters.
No farm jokes. No accent jokes. No innuendos involving where aliens put their genitals. No assless chaps. No rocks or rock-like artifacts resembling said genitals.
Founder's day, I'll take one replicator ration or coupon for therapeutic service. Tuvok -
<She turns; Tuvok nods>
- Tuvok will have a collectible spoon from each planet we stopped at that year. That is all.




Damn, I forgot to mention the bit about roster duties.




Neelix, are these...?
Toenails? You're welcome.
<Tom continues eating>

[JanewayRulz!]

Janeway: Good god, just what this ship needs, another blonde with an attitude!




Chakotay: According to my readings, the beer should be ready to drink in another 21 hours.
Tuvok: I still don't understand why Harry & Tom created this liquid. Would not synthehol be quicker and just as adequate?
Chakotay: Would a Romulan prefer synthehol to perfectly aged ale?
Tuvok: I see.



Tom: Poor guy... he didn't realize what he was getting into when that female Klingon offered to show him Stovokor.



Kim: I'm guessing Tuvix's cooking skill was of Vulcan origin, and not Talaxian.
Tom: Logical.



Janeway: Chakotay?
Chakotay: Yes Captain.
Janeway: I predict this next scene will launch a thousand fanfics.

[Triskelion]

Ensign: Found the Borg baby.

[Nerys Myk]

Tres_Kings wrote:

---

Ensign: Found the Borg baby.

JANEWAY: That explains the smell.

[Triskelion]

^
.

Neelix: Captain. The trunk...in my room....
Janeway: Yes, Neelix?
Neelix: You...were young...needed the...money.
Janeway: He's delirious.



I'm going to need a volunteer for special duty.
...
It's dangerous...and possibly humiliating.
...
If you succeed, you will be the first one in Starfleet.
...
But if you fail...
...
It will be all over Vulcan Youtube.
...
...
...
Sorry Tuvok, looks like you'll have to wait for a future recruit to film you singing "Plomeek Rain."




Kim: Neelix, what are these?
Neelix: Seasons.
Paris: And these?
Neelix: Spices.
Kim: And...this?
Neelix: That is Herb.
Kim: Herb?
Neelix: Herb.

[Ln X]

New contest coming soon in a few hours time!

[Ln X]

A new contest is now up!

http://www.trekbbs.com/showthread.php?p=7398535#post7398535