In Memory Of...

[thestrangequark]

...Our loved-ones. If you have lost a loved-one (family or friend) who you'd like to share about or if you need somewhere to talk, this is the thread for it.

On November 19, 1996, my big brother passed away. He died of hypoglycemia from type 1 diabetes, an inherited autoimmune disease. This time of year, my thoughts turn to him more often, and the memories and associations are usually happy ones. However, this year I've found myself sad and scared. This year has marked the first time in the 17 years since I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes that complications have developed, and rather selfishly, thinking of my brother has of late tended to start me off on gloomy contemplation of my own mortality. So, in an attempt to nourish the positive and celebratory feelings about his life, I decided to share more about him with the people I know, and this thread is a part of that. I also invite others who have lost loved-ones to share about them in this thread and keep their memories alive.

Christopher Robin (give my mom a break, she was only 18 when she named him! ):



He was a charmer from the start, and it was pretty much impossible not to love him:



He had a great sense of style and wanted to be a fashion designer:



He was out and proud, and I think he woud be very proud that the people of our home town, Seattle, this month helped to vote to end discrimination against gays in Washington State:



So here's to you, Christopher: January 10th 1980-November 19th 1996:

[Emher]

I've heard you talk of him before, and it's obvious he was a great guy. I've been lucky enough that I've only lost pets and people whose time had come like my grandfather and great-grandmother.

I think it's only natural that you question your mortality. It's healthy to do so once in a while. I know I certainly dig when my grandfather died.

I've sadly only got one pic on my computer of my grandfather Lennart:



This is pretty old, this is like 1990 or something. That's my sister Monica in his arms, she's about to be married soon.

My grandfather was not a perfect man by any means, but he was filled with such joy most his life. He loved life and his family. And I miss him dearly.


And then, it may seem silly, but there's my dog Keiran. He's been gone over three years, but I still miss him a lot:

[Gryffindorian]

May he rest in peace. And I hope medical advances someday will bring an end to diabetes and improve the quality of life to those of us who are afflicted.

As for loved ones who passed away, I will always have fond memories of my grandparents. I never knew my paternal grandfather but was fortunate to have known all the other grandparents. My dad's mom, ”Polly,” lived with my family when I was growing up in another country. She was a religious woman and was very wise and frugal. My other grandma, ”Aya,” was quite cheerful and social. She played card games with her friends well into her 80s and 90s. My maternal grandfather was a kind and generous man from what I heard. They all lived in the same town, and I was fortunate enough to have known them.

[thestrangequark]

Pets are definitely loved-ones too, Emher, it's not silly at all.

[Kestrel]

This is an excellent thread tsq, thanks for starting it!

I may or may not contribute, but wanted to say how much I appreciate the thread.

[Mr. Laser Beam]

My mom died of MS when I was 11. Although she had been sick for most of my life. I have almost no memory of her from when she was well.

[RandyS]

I've lost so many loved ones they're starting to blur together. But, the three stand-outs for me are:

My grandpa, Paul, October 23, 1924-August 18, 1991.
My grandma, Gloria, January 8, 1926-Febuary 26, 1992.
And, their daughter, my mom, Carol, August 11, 1947-April 22, 2003.

I still miss them every day.

[Gaseous Anomaly]

My mom passed away just a little over a year ago, I still think about her today.

[cooleddie74]

Dad James (Jim) 1949-1998
Mom Wanda (Kay) 1951-2008
Grandpa Edgar 1917-1973
Grandma Ola 1920-1999
Grandpa Dewey 1929-2002
Grandma Mildred 1930-2004
Great Grandma Lena Blanche 1895-1988
Uncle Steve 1962-2012
My childhood dog Barnaby 1984-1998

[Emher]

thestrangequark wrote:

---

Pets are definitely loved-ones too, Emher, it's not silly at all.

Thanks. I think why I have such hard time letting go of him is because he got sick and went before his time. He barely turned 3. Whereas other dogs we've had have lived out full lives before their time came.

And my grandfather was named Lennart. I realized I hadn't written his name, but I think that's largely due to the fact that to me he was "granddad".

[Deranged Nasat]

I've been lucky so far on this front - the only losses I've faced have been due to advanced age and were people I didn't know too well, considering. My heart goes out to those of you who have lost loved ones, especially if the loss is still raw. May the memories be sweet and the pain fleeting. And it's good to have a place like this where you can share your love and loss.

[Ruaidhri]

This is my father, in pictures he sent my mom during his tour in Vietnam, who passed away in 1997, just few days after he turned 50. He survived his time in the military with a Purple Heart and a case of PTSD, was as gentle a soul as there was, loved nature, animals and his children. Alcoholism estranged him from his kids near the end of his life, and though there was a lot of unresolved hurt in the void of his loss, my sisters and I have reached peace with it all. And I will always treasure the fact that the last thing he ever said to my face was "I love you."

[Haggis and tatties]

Too may to name, but i think of them all daily and will miss them all forever.

[thestrangequark]

Ruaidhri, those are beautiful pictures. I understand what alcoholism can do to a family, but I'm glad you've been able to make peace with it. "I love you" is always the last thing my family say to one another when we say goodbye, and it was a long time before I learned not everybody did so.

Today is the anniversary of my brother's death, but here is his namesake, my nephew, Cormac Christopher, 4 and a half months old (and wearing 10 month size clothes!). Keeping the happy thoughts going:

[teya]

My dad (1930 - 2000): Journo, Marine, old-fashion NY progressive Republican. I got to witness his last moment of glory when Tom Delay called him in early 2000 looking for dad's endorsement of then-candidate GWB. Pops went off on a 10 minute tirade about what Bush & Co were doing to the party. 'Twas beautiful to behold.

My soulmate Francis (1955 - 2003): The most accepting, patient soul I've ever known. He never asked anything of anyone but that they be their own authentic self. He had his first dialysis the day before his 23rd birthday & never let rotten health stop him from doing whatever he wanted to do. As his doctor once said of him, "Francis often crawls out on the branch, but he never saws it off behind him."

Tasha (1976 - 1996): She crawled in my window one cold winter night & stayed for 20 years...