Did Data watch porno?

[Admiral James Kirk]

I'M BLIND! OH MY FUCKING GOD I'M BLIND! I JUST IMAGINED DATA DOING A MONEY SHOT ON DR. PULASKI'S WRINKLED, ANCIENT PARCHMENTLIKE FUCKING TITS AND NOW I'M BLIND! THE AGONY! THE GRANDMOTHERFUCKING AGONY!

[Ln X]

The more important question is whether Data got a hard one from watching the porn. I mean he tells Tasha that he is fully functional but he watches porn and it elicits no emotional response?

Perhaps porn doesn't work for Data.

[teacake]

It works if he tells it to work, just like he has perfect pitch if he tells himself to have perfect pitch.

And by work I mean goes up, just like a high note.

[Ln X]

teacake wrote:

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It works if he tells it to work, just like he has perfect pitch if he tells himself to have perfect pitch.

And by work I mean goes up, just like a high note.

Not necessarily...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZyTajRY2_20&feature=plcp

[teacake]

That was hilarious until the icky bit at the end.

[T'Preea]

^^That was a riot! Up until the end bit, of course. Then it just got creepy.

[sbk1234]

Did he even need porn? I mean, didn't he just have an erection chip or something?

[teacake]

I'm thinking he wants it to happen realistically rather than just a push of the little button. He probably watched 10,000 hours of space porn in super fast forward trying to find his personal tastes.

Data's eyes blur back and forth indicating very fast viewing..

Data: Computer freeze image.

Data peers downwards.. something has risen.

And on the screen, a stray photo of Spot that slipped into Orion Girls Gone Wild.

[Guy Gardener]

Data knew that his mother was an android because she was using a mathematical progression to impersonate randomized 'blinking" of her eyelids. Does Data count everyones blinks for just in case they've been replaced by an android?

Which begs the question of before his 'emotion chip' what inside him was ever actually random?

After the emotionchip however I can see some erections just completely getting away from him at the most inopportune of times because he can't restrain the SOB. He can't. His penis has the same mechanical torque/lifting power of a towtruck. Elastic briefs are not going to tell his winkle to behave and confirm to the line of his pants by any stretch of the imagination.

[Melakon]

Data didn't really need porn, what with Geordi always sticking his fingers into him.

[teacake]

Melakon wrote:

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Data didn't really need porn, what with Geordi always sticking his fingers into him.

I can't think which of those two is more sexless.

[R. Star]

teacake wrote:

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I can't think which of those two is more sexless.

General Grin did a recut of that too. It ended with Data saying "Geordi, that is not the correct port."

He comes up with hilariously creepy stuff.

[Tiberius]

R. Star wrote:

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There was one episode, I don't recall if it was Birthright or Descent but he stated he exposed himself to erotic stimuli to elicit an emotional response. Sounded an awful lot like porn to me.

It was descent, he was trying to create another emotional response.

[Ln X]

Guy Gardener wrote:

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After the emotionchip however I can see some erections just completely getting away from him at the most inopportune of times because he can't restrain the SOB. He can't. His penis has the same mechanical torque/lifting power of a towtruck. Elastic briefs are not going to tell his winkle to behave and confirm to the line of his pants by any stretch of the imagination.

No! No! No! I'll never get that image out of my head now!

But if Data could erm... thrust with such strength wouldn't he destroy a humanoid woman's sweet spot?

[Guy Gardener]

And so could an ordinary man if he wasn't gentle, respectful and polite.

On Smallville, Clark claimed that the sentient AI of his father that lived in the fortress taught him fine motor control so that he could finally boff Lana without destroying her.