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Go Back   The Trek BBS > Star Trek TV Series > The Next Generation

The Next Generation All Good Things come to an end...but not here.

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Old September 17 2012, 11:22 PM   #16
shivkala
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!

Damn, doing my customary "lookover of the thread" before posting wasn't a great idea. Too many good ones already! I'll do my best to try, but there were a few, already, I'd bet money will win!

And Nerys Myk, love the King Missile reference!



Data: I do not understand. Commander Riker told me I needed to cock block you, so I developed a method for identifying and terminating roosters while they were still in the egg. I am afraid I must report my failure to the commander. He will be most displeased.



Data: Interesting Geordi, you've managed to cultivate a hobby that will never be mentioned again. Now you can add "model ship building" next to "successful lady's man" on your resume!



Worf: I am sorry, Commander, I had no idea that the "kronk" was not a traditional part of fizzbin.



Worf: Sir, I understand that the budget is tight now, but I request that Starfleet look into a better carrier plan for the tricorder. I am only able to get a signal when I am under your desk.



The HoYay is strong with these two.
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Old September 17 2012, 11:59 PM   #17
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!



Picard: Two hundred years of technological innovation after Archer, and they still haven't found a remedy for squeaking deck plating...
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Old September 18 2012, 12:00 AM   #18
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!


Picard: Any look with the grow-your-hair spreads?
Data: Sadly no sir, it won't stick to anything.
Picard: (sighs) Continue your efforts, for twenty years I've endured this curse, so I suppose I can wait a couple more weeks.


Worf: How do we beat a man who can see the underside of our cards?
Riker: We hope he has the decency not to cheat.
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Old September 18 2012, 12:04 AM   #19
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!

NCC-1701-B wrote: View Post

Riker: "If you are interested, sir."

Picard: "Oh, I am. I just didn't realize you swung that way."
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Old September 18 2012, 12:40 AM   #20
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!

Nerys Myk wrote: View Post


DATA: Then we delete the plank....


WINNER!
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Old September 18 2012, 09:49 AM   #21
Mistral
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!

Sumghai wrote: View Post

Worf: "...bedbugs, lice-CRABS? Captain, you should really clean the carpet after your little, ah, adventures."
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Old September 21 2012, 09:39 AM   #22
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!



Data
: "Drone drone drone ..."
Picard: "meaningless prattle, prattle prattle ..."
Beverly (thinking):The door's right there, I could be there in seconds.
Data: "Dribble, dribble, dribble ..."
Beverly (thinking):God I'm going straight across this table.
Picard: "Orthodox, orthodox, orthodox ..."
Beverly (thinking):Come on Beverly ... do it, do it, do it ...

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Old September 21 2012, 09:54 AM   #23
R. Star
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!

Missed the last one, oops!



Picard: Four paternity tests does not prove it!
Data: Denial is the often the first symptom of parenthood, sir.



Data: But after I installed my emotion chip, I found that pushing Doctor Crusher over the ledge was extremely funny. Is inconsistency a trait of human emotions?



Crusher: At least Data's not here. I swear he rigs the deck.
Riker: Well, I have the best card sense ever!
LaForge: My visor can see through the cards.
Troi: My empathy can detect when people are bluffing
Worf: I will disembowl anyone who beats me.
All: Fold



Worf: I really can replicate you some Depends, sir.



Picard: This is a completely intolerable situation.
Riker: I can replicate you some viagra, the stuff works great!
Picard: How do you know?
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Old September 21 2012, 11:11 AM   #24
Bob Karo
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!



Picard: You know, Number One, a good captain needs abilities like boldness, daring and a good velour uniform, and I'm not convinced you have any of those things.
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Old September 21 2012, 03:17 PM   #25
Cmdr.Druss
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!


Data: "Lt. Worf said I have no balls. But as you can see I have many"
Picard: "You called a staff meeting for this..."


Data: "Very impressive Geordi, but...will it blend?"


Riker: "For the last time Worf. These are poker chips, not potato chips"


Picard: "Find that mouse and you can have your damned tv show!"


Picard: "Oh you dont like my new look, that's a shame. I call it 'I'm the Captain so shut the hell up!' "
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Old September 21 2012, 03:30 PM   #26
inflatabledalek
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!


Riker: Aren't you hot in that?

Picard: Intolerably.

Riker: So why wear it?

Picard: Remember than planet of the transgender people? I lost a bet over whether you'd shag one of them or not.
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Old September 21 2012, 04:58 PM   #27
NAHTMMM
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!


That thing in the lower left. Shouldn't there be slot cars or penguins or something racing along the grooves there?



"But Geordi, how are you going to get this ship into a standard-sized bottle?"
"Oh, I've got a doctor friend who promised to hook me up with some appropriate technology."



"Sorry, sir, it registers as plastic from underneath as well."
"Well doggone it, I wouldn't have paid $500 for this table if I'd known it wasn't real cherry."



"With all due respect, Number One, I'll sing showtunes with Data before I sit in on one of your saxophone performances."
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Old September 22 2012, 01:32 AM   #28
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!



Data: Why did you place a little Wesley figure in the Crow's Nest?

Geordi: Because the kid is a bad egg...
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Old September 22 2012, 01:34 PM   #29
Ln X
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Re: TNG Caption This! 283: Ready to roll!


Data going on and on about relationships, mating and love...

Beverly: Do we really need to hear Data drone on about human relationships?
Picard: I think we do until you stop shying away from my feelings.


Riker: Before we begin I would like to ask Geordi to take off his visor.
Geordi: But I won't be able to see the cards!
Riker: Exactly.


Worf: Sir I must protest, is it really necessary for me to search for a few strands of detached hair?
Picard: I have been fighting this baldness for many years now, every hair counts!
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Old September 22 2012, 03:33 PM   #30
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Picard: "You know, I've been staring at that gizmo for an hour, and I still can't figure out what it is."

Worf: "Neither can I. But it was quite expensive and looks pretty formidable, so I figured I'd better get some decent use out of it."
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