Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILERS) - Page 3

Garak · June 28 2011, 07:10 PM

Dennis wrote:

Flying Spaghetti Monster wrote:

ebert gave it a star.
http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/...IEWS/110629981

"Transformers: Dark of the Moon" is a visually ugly film with an incoherent plot, wooden characters and inane dialog. It provided me with one of the more unpleasant experiences I've had at the movies.

The series exists to show gigantic and hideous robots hammering one another. So it does.

God bless Roger Ebert.

These movies are worthless, unutterably stupid beyond redemption.

It doesn't really matter who the female is in these films; she's just there as T&A.

Another Michael Bay abortion? Who saw that coming?!

Gep Malakai · June 28 2011, 07:25 PM

Well, the reviews have started showing up at Metacritic, and the score so far is a "mixed" 54, barely worse than Pixar's Cars 2 at 58 (!), and significantly better than Green Lantern at 39.

I'm really mixed about whether or not to see this one in the theaters. I mean, I think the previous two are terrible, but there's something compelling about them that suggests they could be improved on.

Harvey · June 28 2011, 07:41 PM

Well, it's now a 48 on Metacritic, doing its best to steadily approach Green Lantern.

I won't be seeing it. I just saw the first film (the "good" one) a few days ago, and thought it was abysmally awful -- just a dreadful film full of thinly drawn characters and piles of product placement.

Gep Malakai · June 28 2011, 07:44 PM

The rapid plunge to the bottom begins.

Ah well. The core idea, as dramatized in the comic adaptation, is really good. Trust Bay to ruin a good thing.

Dream · June 28 2011, 10:48 PM

Gep Malakai wrote:

Well, the reviews have started showing up at Metacritic, and the score so far is a "mixed" 54, barely worse than Pixar's Cars 2 at 58 (!), and significantly better than Green Lantern at 39.

We all knew that this movie would get raped by the critics. We don't go for the reviews, but for the explosions.

CaptainCanada · June 28 2011, 11:34 PM

My favourite review so far is James Berardinelli referring to Rosie Huntington-Whitely as a "model-turned-line reader".

Gep Malakai · June 28 2011, 11:38 PM

My favorite put-down at the moment is the last two paragraphs of the Village Voice review:

The plot? Come on, are you really going to do this to me? I didn’t even bother to see Transformers: The Second One, although it is possible I watched a great deal of it, without sound, on the airplane screen of a passenger sitting a row ahead of me that one time. Something about the moon and a space-time bridge and a new Transformer, Sentinel Prime, who is basically Optimus Prime’s dad (although they’re robots, so it’s unclear how that works). Sentinel is voiced by Leonard Nimoy, appropriately sepulchral. A bunch of robots fight a bunch of other robots, and you can’t tell which are the good robots and which are the bad robots because they all look alike, you robot racist.

The people who you think might be evil turn out to be evil. Humanity triumphs. Optimus Prime gives a speech. Chicago burns. Your brain cells perish by the thousands, their howls of agony lost to the cacophony inside your skull. Vast quantities of money, roughly equal to the GDP of Tonga, travel from America’s wallets into the coffers of Paramount. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley’s ass returns to its home planet to report that Earth is ripe for the plucking. Enjoy it while you can!

"Robot racist." Nice.

Mutenroshi · June 28 2011, 11:40 PM

It was not as bad as the previous one. I voted Above Average for the nice Trek references (Spock, Nimoy and "the" quote).

Dream · June 29 2011, 01:42 AM

Rotten Tomatoes' consensus:

Its special effects -- and 3D shots -- are undeniably impressive, but they aren't enough to fill up its loud, bloated running time, or mask its thin, indifferent script.

Gep Malakai · June 29 2011, 01:58 AM

I just bought a ticket for the advance screening tonight at 10:30 – in 3D, no less! – so less than five hours until I either enjoy myself or have my mind destroyed by the horror. One of those two, judging by the reviews.

Trekker4747 · June 29 2011, 02:09 AM

Armond White is going to love this movie, isn't he?

Dream · June 29 2011, 02:17 AM

Shia admits he nailed Megan Fox.

Shia LaBeouf says the onscreen chemistry fans saw between him and former co-star Megan Fox on the first two installments of “Transformers” was the real thing – the 25-year-old actor claims he hooked up with the bombshell.

When asked by Details magazine in an interview for their August if he’d ever been intimate with Megan, Shia nodded in the affirmative.

“Look, you’re on the set for six months, with someone who’s rooting to be attracted to you, and you’re rooting to be attracted to them,” he told Details. “I never understood the separation of work and life in that situation. But the time I spent with Megan was our own thing, and I think you can see the chemistry onscreen.”

When asked if Megan, 25, was with then-boyfriend-and-now-husband Brian Austin Green at the time, Shia said, “I don’t know, man. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know,” repeating the phrase 12 separate times, then added, “It was what it was.”

A rep for Megan told Access Hollywood, “We do not have a comment.”

http://www.accesshollywood.com/shia-...cess-originals

Gep Malakai · June 29 2011, 02:20 AM

"Chemistry?" Okay.

Klaus · June 29 2011, 02:21 AM

Someone needs to do one of those Hitler-meme vids with him complaining about Fox getting fired for comparing Bay to him.

Dream · June 29 2011, 02:26 AM

Gep Malakai wrote:

"Chemistry?" Okay.

Brian Austin Green has to be extremely pissed right now.

View Poll Results: Grade the movie
Excellent	16	17.39%
Above Average	26	28.26%
Average	24	26.09%
Below Average	9	9.78%
Poor	17	18.48%
Voters: 92. You may not vote on this poll

June 28 2011, 07:25 PM	#32
Gep Malakai Vice Admiral	Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILE Well, the reviews have started showing up at Metacritic, and the score so far is a "mixed" 54, barely worse than Pixar's Cars 2 at 58 (!), and significantly better than Green Lantern at 39. I'm really mixed about whether or not to see this one in the theaters. I mean, I think the previous two are terrible, but there's something compelling about them that suggests they could be improved on. __________________ "From the darkness you must fall, failed and weak, to darkness all." -Kataris

June 28 2011, 07:41 PM	#33
Harvey Admiral	Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILE Well, it's now a 48 on Metacritic, doing its best to steadily approach Green Lantern. I won't be seeing it. I just saw the first film (the "good" one) a few days ago, and thought it was abysmally awful -- just a dreadful film full of thinly drawn characters and piles of product placement. __________________ "What do you hear, Starbuck?" "Nothing but the rain, sir." "Then grab your gun and bring in the cat."

June 28 2011, 07:44 PM	#34
Gep Malakai Vice Admiral	Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILE The rapid plunge to the bottom begins. Ah well. The core idea, as dramatized in the comic adaptation, is really good. Trust Bay to ruin a good thing. __________________ "From the darkness you must fall, failed and weak, to darkness all." -Kataris

June 28 2011, 11:34 PM	#36
CaptainCanada Admiral Location: Kingston, Ontario, Canada	Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILE My favourite review so far is James Berardinelli referring to Rosie Huntington-Whitely as a "model-turned-line reader". __________________ "I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are!" - Homer Simpson

STAR TREK

CSI

ABOUT US

June 28 2011, 11:40 PM	#38
Mutenroshi 亀仙人 - 武天老師 Location: Mutenroshi	Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILE It was not as bad as the previous one. I voted Above Average for the nice Trek references (Spock, Nimoy and "the" quote). __________________ Let There Be Rock! Jack Beauregard: "You shine like the door of a whorehouse!" *Nobody:* "I like folks to see me."

June 29 2011, 01:58 AM	#40
Gep Malakai Vice Admiral	Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILE I just bought a ticket for the advance screening tonight at 10:30 – in 3D, no less! – so less than five hours until I either enjoy myself or have my mind destroyed by the horror. One of those two, judging by the reviews. __________________ "From the darkness you must fall, failed and weak, to darkness all." -Kataris

June 29 2011, 02:09 AM	#41
Trekker4747 To boldly go... Location: Kansas City	Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILE Armond White is going to love this movie, isn't he? __________________ Just because it's futuristic doesn't mean it's practical.

June 29 2011, 02:20 AM	#43
Gep Malakai Vice Admiral	Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILE "Chemistry?" Okay. __________________ "From the darkness you must fall, failed and weak, to darkness all." -Kataris

June 29 2011, 02:21 AM	#44
Klaus Rear Admiral Location: Beach condo, Bay of Eldamar	Re: Transformers: Dark of the Moon - Discuss, Grading, Reviews (SPOILE Someone needs to do one of those Hitler-meme vids with him complaining about Fox getting fired for comparing Bay to him. __________________ "Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it." - Mark Twain t-shirts! deviantArt