TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions

Rat Boy · January 3 2011, 06:28 PM

Slappy nude beer! Time to get things back on track so let's start with...

Since this really went all over the place, I'll just name them in chronological order, photoshop or not:

ItsGreen wrote:

Enterprise, prepare for slingshot maneuver.
It looks like everything is settled down here.
He just made him an offer he couldn't refuse!

Rudolph the Red Nosed Vulcan wrote:

Spock: "Are you pondering what I am pondering, Captain?"

Kirk: "Yes, but where are we going to get an erotic puppeteer at this time of night?"

captain crow wrote:

5 LeadHead Rings wrote:

Harry Mudd throwing the electric guitar across the room was very loud. And expensive.

No North Pole Penquins wrote:

MASON: What did the natives call this world?

KRISTEN: "Krypton" I think.

CORTEZ: I got a bad feeling about this.

alte wrote:

Gary7 wrote:

Kelvan: "That all you got?"
Scotty: "You've not had enough, laddie? Look behind ya."
Kelvan: "Happy New Year! Let's drink..."

Yes, let's! Congratulations to the winners. Maybe in future contests I'll drop some more images from my Star Trek Online exploits, but for this week we have Scotty trying to roll back the odometer, Kirk wanting McCoy to give it to him straight, and one red shirt who's glad he was standing two feet to the left. Enjoy:

Rat Boy · January 3 2011, 06:30 PM

Scotty: "Aye, the wiring's shot to hell. That'll cost extra."

Spock: "Will my insurance cover it?"

Scotty: "Not bloody likely."

Kirk: "Holy crap! This Photoshop's great!"

McCoy: "Jim, this is the original picture."

Lieutenant: "Damn. He's not going to be in the movie!"

Jonas Grumby · January 3 2011, 07:00 PM

Scotty: "Well, I'm verra sorry, Mr. Spock--and I suppose I should be flattered--but I really have to get these circuits repaired now. I'm afraid yer jus' gonna have to find someone else or wait another seven years."

Kirk: "You know what I like about you, Bones? That an old guy like you can take orders from a young guy like me and not let your ego get all bent out of shape over it!"
McCoy: "You know, maybe Sulu and Uhura are right about you."

middyseafort · January 3 2011, 07:10 PM

Spock: Mr. Scott, now is not the time for me to sit on your face and inform you of the romantic feelings I harbor for you.

Kirk: Bones, space is disease and danger, wrapped in dark —
McCoy: Hey, that's my line!

Lieutenant: Look at me... I'm Captain Kirk. I wear a girdle to hide my tummy from the ladies.

captain crow · January 3 2011, 07:14 PM

Thanks for the win Rat Boy.

Lieutenant: Dayum Captain Kirk! You got knocked the fuck out!

T'Girl · January 3 2011, 07:42 PM

middyseafort wrote:

Lieutenant: Look at me... I'm Captain Kirk. I wear a girdle to hide my tummy from the ladies.

The other security guards begin to giggle.

Lieutenant: He's standing right behind me, isn't he?

TrickyDickie · January 3 2011, 08:44 PM

Scotty: "Been watchin' The Presidio again, Mr Spock?"

Spock: "Clearly, my left thumb is too powerful for you."

Kirk: "It's those Roman-style episodes, Bones. If I don't hold your arms on for a while they'll fall off, just like all those statues."

McCoy: "Well, okay....after all, I'm a doctor, not an arms dealer."

Redfern · January 3 2011, 09:22 PM

"I ain't cleanin' that up, shi...! Wha'd I look like to you, a janitor?!"

Sincerely,

Bill

Gary7 · January 3 2011, 09:47 PM

Scotty: "Mr. Spock, ya make a fine 1st officer, but as a do-it-yourself mechanic? Ahk, ya leave much ta be desired."
Spock: "Well, it was indeed my first stereo installation."

Kirk: (singing) "Have I told you... lately... that I love you?"
McCoy: "Saurian brandy blues again, eh Jim?"

Lieutenant: "I can't believe they ordered me instead of that nitwit ensign to mop this sh!t up. 23rd century equality, my @ss!"

LeadHead · January 3 2011, 09:57 PM

Nimoy: So let me get this straight, we waited for several episodes for the shuttlecraft to be built, and now the shuttlecraft is gonna get vaporized in the atmosphere?

Doohan: Our budget is well spent, isn't it?

Kirk: Bones don't worry, I'm sure Spock didn't mean what he said.

Spock: Yes I did.

Kirk: Shut up!

Lieutenant: Security to the Bridge.

Kirk: (over comm) Kirk here.

Lieutenant: Scotty's drunk again Sir, and it looks like this time he actually poured the booze into the plasma conduits.

Kirk: (over comm) He got my ship drunk too?!

Jonas Grumby · January 3 2011, 09:59 PM

Lieutenant: "Latimer to bridge! I found the Tellerite ambassador, sir! Apparently, he tried to get fresh with Yeoman Rand and she coldcocked the sucker!"

Gary7 · January 3 2011, 11:02 PM

Thanks for the win, Rat Boy!

The lieutenant suddenly felt inspired and sang...

"When the night has come
And the land is dark
And the moon is the only light we'll see
No I won't be afraid, no I won't be afraid
Just as long as you stand, stand by me."

Scotty (OS): "Laddie, you're a fine engineer and I'll stand by ya anytime, but do ya hafta break inta song about it?"

.

Rat Boy · January 3 2011, 11:08 PM

After a few years, red-shirts start to get indifferent to having their friends turned into a pile of goo.

ItsGreen · January 4 2011, 12:30 AM

(Thanks for the win

)

---------------------------------------

Keep your chin up! Dr. King still may contact you, but remember,
you're still just a "red shirt" character and may not be around for much longer.

Gary7 · January 4 2011, 12:36 AM

Scotty (OS): "Latimer, push the flashing red button. Quickly!"

January 3 2011, 07:00 PM	#3
Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Location: Somewhere in the South Pacific	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Scotty: "Well, I'm verra sorry, Mr. Spock--and I suppose I should be flattered--but I really have to get these circuits repaired now. I'm afraid yer jus' gonna have to find someone else or wait another seven years." Kirk: "You know what I like about you, Bones? That an old guy like you can take orders from a young guy like me and not let your ego get all bent out of shape over it!" McCoy: "You know, maybe Sulu and Uhura are right about you." __________________ "There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer Last edited by Jonas Grumby; January 4 2011 at 12:33 AM.

January 3 2011, 07:10 PM	#4
middyseafort Rear Admiral Location: The Bay Area	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Spock: Mr. Scott, now is not the time for me to sit on your face and inform you of the romantic feelings I harbor for you. Kirk: Bones, space is disease and danger, wrapped in dark — McCoy: Hey, that's my line! Lieutenant: Look at me... I'm Captain Kirk. I wear a girdle to hide my tummy from the ladies. __________________ A mild-mannered reporter Literary Masturbation

January 3 2011, 07:14 PM	#5
captain crow Fleet Captain Location: Onboard a sliver dog bone shaped satellite in Earth orbit	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Thanks for the win Rat Boy. Lieutenant: Dayum Captain Kirk! You got knocked the fuck out! __________________ "I calculated the odds of this succeeding versus the odds I was doing something incredibly stupid, and I went ahead anyway." - Crow T. Robot, Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie Last edited by captain crow; January 3 2011 at 07:41 PM.

January 3 2011, 08:44 PM	#7
TrickyDickie Commodore	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Scotty: "Been watchin' The Presidio again, Mr Spock?" Spock: "Clearly, my left thumb is too powerful for you." Kirk: "It's those Roman-style episodes, Bones. If I don't hold your arms on for a while they'll fall off, just like all those statues." McCoy: "Well, okay....after all, I'm a doctor, not an arms dealer."

January 3 2011, 09:22 PM	#8
Redfern Fleet Captain Location: Georgia, USA	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions *"I ain't cleanin' that up, shi...! Wha'd I look like to you, a janitor?!"* Sincerely, Bill __________________ Tempt the Hand of Fate and it'll give you the "finger"! Freighter Tails: the Misadventures of Mzzkiti

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ABOUT US

January 3 2011, 06:30 PM	#2
Rat Boy Vice Admiral Location: Home of the World Champion San Francisco Giants!	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Scotty: "Aye, the wiring's shot to hell. That'll cost extra." Spock: "Will my insurance cover it?" Scotty: "Not bloody likely." Kirk: "Holy crap! This Photoshop's great!" McCoy: "Jim, this is the original picture." Lieutenant: "Damn. He's not going to be in the movie!"

January 3 2011, 09:47 PM	#9
Gary7 Rear Admiral Location: Near Manhattan ··· in an alternate reality	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Scotty: "Mr. Spock, ya make a fine 1st officer, but as a do-it-yourself mechanic? Ahk, ya leave much ta be desired." Spock: "Well, it was indeed my first stereo installation." Kirk: (singing) "Have I told you... lately... that I love you?" McCoy: "Saurian brandy blues again, eh Jim?" Lieutenant: "I can't believe they ordered me instead of that nitwit ensign to mop this sh!t up. 23rd century equality, my @ss!" __________________ Remembering Ensign Mallory.

January 3 2011, 09:57 PM	#10
LeadHead The Not-Quite-So-Brave-As-Sir-Lancelot Location: Somewhere with Internet access.	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Nimoy: So let me get this straight, we waited for several episodes for the shuttlecraft to be built, and now the shuttlecraft is gonna get vaporized in the atmosphere? Doohan: Our budget is well spent, isn't it? Kirk: Bones don't worry, I'm sure Spock didn't mean what he said. Spock: Yes I did. Kirk: Shut up! Lieutenant: Security to the Bridge. Kirk: (over comm) Kirk here. Lieutenant: Scotty's drunk again Sir, and it looks like this time he actually poured the booze into the plasma conduits. Kirk: (over comm) He got my ship drunk too?! __________________ Current Caption Contests: TNG TOS Movies I-X

January 3 2011, 09:59 PM	#11
Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Location: Somewhere in the South Pacific	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Lieutenant: "Latimer to bridge! I found the Tellerite ambassador, sir! Apparently, he tried to get fresh with Yeoman Rand and she coldcocked the sucker!" __________________ "There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer

January 3 2011, 11:02 PM	#12
Gary7 Rear Admiral Location: Near Manhattan ··· in an alternate reality	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Thanks for the win, Rat Boy! The lieutenant suddenly felt inspired and sang... "When the night has come And the land is dark And the moon is the only light we'll see No I won't be afraid, no I won't be afraid Just as long as you stand, stand by me." Scotty (OS): "Laddie, you're a fine engineer and I'll stand by ya anytime, but do ya hafta break inta song about it?" . __________________ Remembering Ensign Mallory. Last edited by Gary Sever; January 4 2011 at 12:37 AM.

January 3 2011, 11:08 PM	#13
Rat Boy Vice Admiral Location: Home of the World Champion San Francisco Giants!	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions After a few years, red-shirts start to get indifferent to having their friends turned into a pile of goo.

January 4 2011, 12:30 AM	#14
ItsGreen Commander	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions (Thanks for the win) --------------------------------------- Keep your chin up! Dr. King still may contact you, but remember, you're still just a "red shirt" character and may not be around for much longer.

January 4 2011, 12:36 AM	#15
Gary7 Rear Admiral Location: Near Manhattan ··· in an alternate reality	Re: TOS Caption Contest #207: Consultations and Resolutions Scotty (OS): "Latimer, push the flashing red button. Quickly!" __________________ Remembering Ensign Mallory.