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Old November 7 2010, 09:02 AM   #31
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Re: Too Many Decisions

Pitty she didn´t eat it. Though seems she is a sweet tooth.
What helps to raise appitite quite well is CaniBac Gel (normally used for getting the gut flora going again), though try only such things, if you feel sure she still wants to live.
What we also did was giving her with an injection (without the needle on it) a electrolyte-water stuff in the mouth, around every 30 minutes....though we had to do that mainly, because of the strong diarrhoea she had. No ida if this something also done, when the dog does not eat, but does not has diarrhoea.
Oh and also good are homeopathic medicines... she got those too and for her that things are helping, though no idea which one would be the right one for your dog in that situation.

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Old November 7 2010, 10:15 AM   #32
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Re: Too Many Decisions

Sorry John, haven't been on this weekend. As a fellow dog nut if you want to talk just PM me. Nothing makes it easy but sometimes a one-to-one helps. So pleased about your Mum. She sounds like a trooper.
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Old November 7 2010, 11:01 AM   #33
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Re: Too Many Decisions

Here is another person pulling for you & your family! You are such a kind person, I have to believe that the rest of your family is equally nice. I am sorry you are in such a predicament with your sweet dog...you love her and you recognize the power of healing she represents for your mom.

Because I am away for irregular periods of time, I only have cats, but I love dogs as well. Although I am hoping your dog will pull through for your mom's sake...but if the time comes that your dog needs peace...can you ask your vet to come to your home? It would be a kindness for her not to have to make that final journey to the vet's office. Some vets are willing to make that final visit to make it easier for the dog (and in my case one of my cats).
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Old November 7 2010, 02:48 PM   #34
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Re: Too Many Decisions

Really pleased to hear she's starting to come round, J. It may not be forever, she's not young, but every day is golden, every day.
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Old November 7 2010, 04:07 PM   #35
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Re: Too Many Decisions

Thank you all for the kind words, and Captain Ice, thank you so much for your post, I mean it, and I can't wait for this year to go away, either. Yeah ELK, my mom's just as sweet as I am, and stubborn, kind to a fault, and most importantly, humble.

Yes, Australis, each day is a golden day. A minor victory, and I will take each one that I have left. Terok Nor, I got Dallie to drink a little bit of milk last night, so at least that's something. Deckerd, Right now I'm just doing my best to make her comfortable, to make her feel good. Some of my family insists I should try the surgery, but it's such a long shot, and the outcome so uncertain. I don't want to put her through that kind of procedure if it's not going to actually help, and the odds are even more likely, given her advanced age, that she would die on the operating table. What kind of passing is that? If I choose to have her euthanized, it can be done outside, in the warm sun, in the grass, with me right beside her. I would think that would be preferable to going under on a cold operating table surrounded by strangers and never waking up.
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Old November 7 2010, 04:13 PM   #36
propita
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Re: Too Many Decisions

My parents had a dog (Buttons) that had gotten on in years and was not doing well. The vet said the same thing ... try some food, see if he’ll eat and bring him in in 4 days. Mom very little cooked up some hamburger (people food), so it would be soft for Buttons. He ate for a couple of days, not much, and the vet was amazed that he was alive 4 days later, but then Buttons stopped eating and started avoiding us--from a dog who would always be in the room people were in. The vet said he was going away to die and that we should bring him in. Buttons was a good dog. He was a black poodle, around 25 pounds and annoyingly smart; smart enough to try and trick us on occasion.
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Old November 7 2010, 11:28 PM   #37
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Re: Too Many Decisions

^^ One of the great injustices of life is that our Pets live such a short time compared to our own lives.

J, I'm glad to hear Dallie is doing a bit better. I hope she continues to improve. Remember Mallory-- anything is possible.
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Old November 7 2010, 11:57 PM   #38
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Re: Too Many Decisions

J. Allen wrote: View Post
Thank you all for the kind words, and Captain Ice, thank you so much for your post, I mean it, and I can't wait for this year to go away, either. Yeah ELK, my mom's just as sweet as I am, and stubborn, kind to a fault, and most importantly, humble.

Yes, Australis, each day is a golden day. A minor victory, and I will take each one that I have left. Terok Nor, I got Dallie to drink a little bit of milk last night, so at least that's something. Deckerd, Right now I'm just doing my best to make her comfortable, to make her feel good. Some of my family insists I should try the surgery, but it's such a long shot, and the outcome so uncertain. I don't want to put her through that kind of procedure if it's not going to actually help, and the odds are even more likely, given her advanced age, that she would die on the operating table. What kind of passing is that? If I choose to have her euthanized, it can be done outside, in the warm sun, in the grass, with me right beside her. I would think that would be preferable to going under on a cold operating table surrounded by strangers and never waking up.

My middle son, at 8 years of age had a dog named "Bingo".

One day we came home and Bingo couldn't walk...

We went to the local vet, some X-rays were taken, some tests made, and we were given the verdict, Bingo had stomach cancer, probably malignant, and the only thing that could be done was surgery, at approx $5000.00 . My budget couldn't afford such a huge hit..So I told my little boy that his dog would be put down. He looked up at me and asked that he could be there with Bingo..because "I don't want him to die with stranger's around.."


And my 8 year old bravely did just that...


Don't let the poor animal suffer anymore than you have to...
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Old November 8 2010, 12:05 AM   #39
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Re: Too Many Decisions

J Allen I am so sorry about your dog. have had that problem myself. The choice is never easy, but you will know what to do when it has to be done.

Glad there is good news with your mom. She sounds like a truly lovely lady.

I also vote for a quick end to 2010.
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Old November 8 2010, 05:31 AM   #40
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Re: Too Many Decisions

Thanks everybody. I mean it. For a while this evening, I was very depressed, because she wouldn't take her medicines, and she wouldn't even move. You had to lean down to hear her breathing. About half an hour ago, though, she got up, and went in my room where her second bed is, and laid on that! That was the first time she had done that in over a week! Then, she ate a whole slice of cheese, and a small piece of burger! I cried like a little baby and hugged her for a good ten minutes!

So regardless of what happens ahead, and what must happen, her demeanor is improving, and that heartens me.

So a while ago, I went up to the hospital to visit my mom. I will say this, I'm annoyed with some of the nurses in that hospital. When I went in there, she had been calling them for 20 minutes because she was cold, and was also in a poor position on her bed (she can't stand up yet) where she was in danger of falling off. After I got her righted and comfortable again, I went to the linen room, got her a blanket myself, covered her up, turned up the thermostat a degree or two, and tucked her in. She had stains on her pillows where they had changed IVs and didn't clean it up, so I switched out her pillows. Her IV unit started beeping because it was nearly empty, and after 15 minutes of no nurse showing up, I called the button for the nurses. 10 minutes pass, no one answers. I walk down to the nurse's station, no one's there. I walk all about that hallway, no one in sight. Finally, 45 minutes later, someone arrives and presses the IV button and leaves. Comes back 10 minutes later with a new bag. I was fuming.

I was upset because she can't eat, she can't drink water, and so depends upon that IV to keep her hydrated. These people don't get in any hurry. I was getting ready to leave for the night, around 10 PM, and I could hear this little old lady calling out for help in her room. She kept saying "I need some help, please!". I went to find a nurse to let them know the lady needed help (her call signal was beeping so it's not like they didn't know), and they said they'd take care of it. I certainly hope they did.

I'm thinking about writing a letter.
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Old November 8 2010, 10:36 AM   #41
RJDonner&Blitzen
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Re: Too Many Decisions

^^ Do it. Send copies to the head of nursing, the head of surgery and the hospital president. Either they're understaffed or their nurses are incompetent, but either way they should know their patients aren't happy.
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Old November 8 2010, 12:19 PM   #42
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Re: Too Many Decisions

Wow. Yes, write them a letter!
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Old November 8 2010, 03:44 PM   #43
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Re: Too Many Decisions

J. Allen wrote: View Post
propita wrote: View Post
You know what you have to do regarding Dallie, no matter how painful it is. It’s not fair to make her live in pain.

NOT a comparison, but a comparison. You’ll understand what I mean. When Dad suddenly went down, we were told all the things that were wrong: infection, couldn’t wean him off the oxygen, cancer was taking over, the meds were maxed out, and his heart wasn’t going to take much more, let alone treatment. The doctors were amazed that we (Mom, me, my 2 siblings) all agreed to take him off the machines--that usually someone says “No, do everything and let them live.” I asked the doctor that if they kept him alive, what would Dad be beyond “cancer-food” at that point. We hated it, all of it, but we knew he wouldn’t want this. And honestly, it was only a matter of time before either the meds wouldn’t be able to keep him alive or that the cancer would spread so much more that it would literally take him over. AMAZINGLY fast-spreading, one month it was something they wanted to monitor over the next year, the next month he was gone. It’s been 3 1/2 years and I was crying for him just this week, because he was in a dream of mine, encouraging me on.

Love is love. If you love your dog, you will treat the end of her life with the love and respect you treated her life.
Thank you, propita. I do love my dog. She's been my best friend for more than 15 years, and I need to do right by her. Whatever that may be.

Mr Awe wrote: View Post
J. Allen wrote: View Post
I have until Wednesday at the latest to see if she improves. Even if she does, though, the chances of her living past next week are slim. I want to take every chance I can to save her, but we're so short on money and I don't know how much that kind of surgery costs.
First thing to do is to get all the facts. Find out how much that surgery will cost. You should've asked the vet on the spot. They can give you an ballpark estimate.

From there, you can then start to make decisions. Is this amount feasible at all or is it just plain impossible. Is it feasible but difficult? If it's feasible, what sort of sacrifices would you have to make to be able to afford it? That sort of stuff.

In the end, it's a gamble. Flip a coin and that money is either just gone or you have your dog for awhile longer. Personally, I'd take that gamble even if it meant some sacrifices.

However, if things don't go well and you do need to put her to sleep, you'll know and you'll find the strength. I was in a similar situation with a beloved cat of many years. Once she was in pain and there was no hope, the decision became a non-decision. It was the only possible course of action.

Best of luck to your Mom and Dallie.

Mr Awe
Thank you, Mr. Awe. You know, I should have asked what the cost of surgery would be. At the time, though, when he started talking about euthanasia, my ears started ringing and I couldn't concentrate. I will be sure to call them Monday morning and ask for a general ballpark figure, but only if she improves, and only if he thinks it will seriously increase her quality and length of life.

Edit: I just realized that it looks like I care for my dog more than I do my mom, and I just want to explain that quickly. I love my mom dearly and would do anything for her, but I know she's going to be okay. Her road ahead is bright with hope. With Dallie, it's not so bright, and things are getting darker faster, and so I'm concentrating my attention there, but that isn't to say I'm not doting over my mom (I am) and working to make her feel better. I just didn't want it to seem like I'm not concerned about my mom or that I don't care. I do, and I do very much. I don't know, I guess it's a form of emotional triage. I just wanted to explain that.
Hey J, believe me, I know it's a lot to think about and remembering to ask the right questions with so many emotions is difficult. I've gone through this with several cats who had incurable diseases. It is a habit I got into of asking for all information that I could on the spot. Hopefully, you don't get the practice at it that I did!

Keep us updated and I'm sending good thoughts your way.

And, yeah, I'm sure that we all figured you were taking good care of your Mom as well! You must overloaded! Make sure you get some time for yourself even though it must be difficult.

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Old November 8 2010, 03:57 PM   #44
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Re: Too Many Decisions

^^J., I'll add my name to the list regarding writing a letter of complaint to the hospital. The nurses cannot help being understaffed but the least they could do when they do show up is apologise for the delay. What your mother is going through is unacceptable.
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Old November 8 2010, 04:25 PM   #45
Yeoman Randi
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Re: Too Many Decisions

John, i was recently telling this story to Astrosmurf, about when my Dad was in the hospital for a very long time.

The doctors and nurses have to harden themselves up or they could never survive their jobs. I think in doing so, they get "too hard" and no longer see their patients as human beings. This does not excuse their behavior or the poor care or lack of attention they give their patients.

I did something for my dad that greatly improved his care. I made the staff see him as a human being, an interesting person who was loved by his family. What did i do?

Heh. I put up "The Kramer" poster in his hospital room. He was in the cardiac ICU at the time. He loved Seinfeld and it was one of the things he and i could talk and joke endlessly about. Not only did the poster make him laugh, but it made every single hospital employee stop, look, laugh and talk to him about the poster itself and about the show. Everytime he was moved from one room in the hospital to another (he was in for about 4 months that first time round), it moved with him.

I swear to god, that poster made a HUGE difference in the way he was cared for. Every nurse, doctor, aid, janitor, whatever, ended up knowing my dad and taking more time with him than they had before.

Figure out a way to make your mother stand out and seem more like the loving caring mother and human being she is, than just another body in a bed. It could help.

Sending you lots of love, positive vibes and {{squishy hugs}}.
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