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Old August 11 2009, 02:33 AM   #1
Trekker4747
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Smurfette was a whore.

There were thousands of Smurfs. Virtually all of them were male and we only saw one female. Smurfette.

So either Smurfs reproduce asexually into "male-like" creatures and Smurfette was a bizzare "birth defect" or the male-to-female ratio in ther genome is fucked up to the point where Smurfette has to sleep with every male Smurf in their village to propagate the speices.

A hot-dog and a hallway comes to mind but I believe I will postpone.
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Last edited by Trekker4747; August 11 2009 at 03:07 AM.
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Old August 11 2009, 02:40 AM   #2
Spaceman Spiff
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

Yes, the Smurfs reproduce asexually. Smurfette was created by Gargamel.

Don't ask me how I remember that, but there you go.
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Old August 11 2009, 02:44 AM   #3
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

Based on the thread topic alone, I thought this was going to be a Jayson thread.
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Old August 11 2009, 02:49 AM   #4
Mr. Adventure
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

They reproduce by smurfing each other in the smurf.
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Old August 11 2009, 02:53 AM   #5
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

They're mammals -- Papa Smuft has a fucking beard!


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Old August 11 2009, 03:06 AM   #6
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

Spaceman Spiff wrote: View Post
Yes, the Smurfs reproduce asexually. Smurfette was created by Gargamel.

Don't ask me how I remember that, but there you go.
I just checked on Wikipedia. True in both the comic and the cartoon.

That's fascinating. It seems that the Smurfs were a bit deeper than I was led to believe.
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Old August 11 2009, 03:06 AM   #7
USS Triumphant
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

Spaceman Spiff wrote: View Post
Yes, the Smurfs reproduce asexually. Smurfette was created by Gargamel.

Don't ask me how I remember that, but there you go.
I'll go you one better.

Smurfette was created by Gargamel, but improved by Papa Smurf.

Gargamel had originally been the apprentice of Father Abraham, a powerful wizard, but he was turned aside because of his evil. Then Father Abraham made Papa Smurf, and made him his apprentice. Together they made the rest of the smurfs, except for the "cousins" and Baby Smurf, whom Papa Smurf made after Father Abraham was gone (died?).

There were two other females: Sassette, one of the cousins, and Granny Smurf, who was never seen in the early cartoons, but one would assume was somewhere around the whole time.

Oh, and they're made magically. No sex. Smurfs are like golems.

(I designed a Filmation/Hanna-Barbera-based roleplaying game a few years back. The Smurfs were a playable race, along with anthropomorphic sharks (Jabberjaw), anthropomorphic dogs (Scooby-doo), Pac people, Birdpeople like Birdman and the Sorceress from He-Man, and Thunderans. )
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Old August 11 2009, 03:25 AM   #8
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

Smurfette was alone at home when her washing mashine died. She called handy Smurf to come fix it. When he arrived she was all hot and dishevilled. She pulled out his smurf and began to-CENSORED.
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Old August 11 2009, 03:38 AM   #9
Kestrel
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

I suddenly feel the need to re-watch Donnie Darko...
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Old August 11 2009, 03:44 AM   #10
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

I was in a Children's Lit class as an undergrad and another student whispered this joke to me:

Q: What is "smoreplay"?
A: It's what Smurfs do before they "smuck"

The prof almost threw me out of class for all the surpressed giggling I was doing.
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Old August 11 2009, 04:04 AM   #11
Trekker4747
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

Wait. Smurfs eat campfire treats before having sex?

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Old August 11 2009, 05:07 AM   #12
Mike Farley
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

USS_Triumphant wrote: View Post
(I designed a Filmation/Hanna-Barbera-based roleplaying game a few years back. The Smurfs were a playable race, along with anthropomorphic sharks (Jabberjaw), anthropomorphic dogs (Scooby-doo), Pac people, Birdpeople like Birdman and the Sorceress from He-Man, and Thunderans. )
Did this ever come out? I don't even play role playing games but I want to read the sourcebook.
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Old August 11 2009, 05:11 AM   #13
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

Trekker4747 wrote: View Post
Wait. Smurfs eat campfire treats before having sex?

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Old August 11 2009, 05:28 AM   #14
Thespeckledkiwi
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

You should have seen Robot Chicken last night.

"You mean there are more than one woman?" Or something along those lines

Reminds me a little bit of Transformers. One female and all those dudes. Though they did have one or two women. But none of the Decepticon side. Which is kind of weird.
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Old August 11 2009, 06:00 AM   #15
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Re: Smurfette was a whore.

She could have been a lesbian
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