TNG Caption This #165 - "The Droid Always Wins"

LEAH: And WHY does she come programmed with TWO vaginas and THREE nipples?!




Ronco Records Presents:

SONGS IN THE KEY OF POSITRON

 

HEY, HEY, A WIN! Thanks!



Brahms: "If you're going to use my likeness in your holo-sex program, at least get it right. I only wore my hair like that for my U.P. ID photo, I tend to smile much more, and my TITS were never that small."




Geordi (OS): "Have you taken up classical?"

Data: "Close. It is 'Little Guitars' by Van Halen."

 

Data: "Now that I have mastered 'Back in Black', I shall begin work on 'I wanna Rock'."

 

Picard (OS, holding a lit Bic Lighter) "FREEBIRD!"

 

Data: "I call this one 'Wesley's Anus', because it is loose in structure and sounds intriguing ..."

 

Data: "Love, love me do; You know I love you; I'll always be true ..."
Data, Worf, Geordi, and Riker: "So pleeee-hee-hee-heeeeee-ees ..."
Data: "Love me do-oo; Oh-oh, love me do ..."

 

Data: "I have mastered all of the works of 'Sonny Clemonds', but I still can not figure out the meaning of 'low milage pit woofie'."

 

Data: "Blinded by the light ... wrapped like a douche, another roller in the night ..."
<Geordi moves to correct Data, but Riker stops him.>

 

The new Esteban 5000 holographic guitar.

Now available on Home Shopping Network for just one thousand credits!

 

LEAH:When you said something in the transporter room about "longing to double your pleasure," I ASSUMED you meant you had a fetish for gum!!



DATA: I hope you enjoy my performance, sir.

This is a long-forgotten pop selection from 1990s Earth entitled "Used to Love Her, But I Had to Kill Her."

 

Data: "Practice, practice, practice. But it will be worth it to see the delighted look on Worf's face when I introduce a 1930's-style singing cowboy into his 'Old West' holodeck simulation."

 

Data always whooped everyone else's asses at GUITAR HERO: ADAM & THE SPACE HIPPIES Edition.

 

LEAH:She doesn't even LOOK like me!

Since WHEN do I have cankles and a tramp stamp?!

 

Data (singing): "So my girl got killed by an oil slick and my cat coughed up a hairball..."

 

Data (singing like Jim Croce): So I'll have to say I love you in a Noonien Soong....

 

Data's Playlist:

Cat's In the Cradle

Boy Named Sue

Poppa Was a Rolling Stone

Papa, Can You Hear Me?

Father of Mine

 

Data, head twitching: "Historical records indicate ... I will not be a true 'rock star' ... until I have a groupie do a line of cocaine off my penis."
Picard: "Finest kind."

 

Where, where, are you tonight?
Why did you leave me here all alone?
I searched the world over,
And thought I found true love.
You met another and
Phht! you were gone.

 

WINNAR!

 

Nero, singing like Enrique Iglesias: I can be your Nero baby....