Family! I love my brother, I would do anything for him when it really mattered... But right now I want to take a nice hefty shovel to the side of his damn head. He is an idiot, who has set my mother into a frustration spiral which has made her pissed at me, just because he is a baby Huey.
I'd rather deal with you right now than him, D. At least you are fun, and smart. Dealing with him, I'm reminded of that cartoon... The one with the idiot child walking and repeating, "My mommy done told me... To go to the fair..."
I figured that was what the shovel would be for. I've tried, he is just so aloof that he doesn't get it.
Relatives who constantly ask advice that they then ignore when going on with the problem they had asked about. I have a couple with that habit. The Pacific has mercifully taken care of that.
I dunno, the situation is rarely so simple where the only explanation is "He's an idiot." None of us follow rational advice and do the right or logical thing all the time. I'm not saying that I don't have family members who drive me crazy, because I very much do. But joking about taking a shovel to someone's head isn't exactly giving you the high ground either.
I don't have a problem with folks going on differently from the advice, it's the couple of relatives who I know aren't going to listen even before they've finished asking for my thoughts on the matter in question. The one's I'm thinking of already usually have their idea of action already half baked. And is usually that way when they act. The futility of the dance now remains back home.
I can relate. My brother was a master at this. He kept my mom (who was already high strung) in a constant state of pain and misery. And the way he treated me......ugh. If I didn't pay his debts (often when I couldn't afford to, and he would NEVER pay me back, despite repeated promises to), buy his beer, and let him drive my specially outfitted pickup (I used hand controls due to having cerebral palsy) despite the fact that both his car AND license was confiscated by the cops due to several DUIs and other fender benders, he would bitch and moan to my mom until she in turn would badger me into helping him. Or rather enabling him. And if all that wasn't enough, if any of us, or his friends would ask him for help, he'd collapse in a "baby huey" fit that was sight unto itself.
My sister is 46 years old, has a teenage son, and my parents are still supporting her. They're paying her mortgage. She was a drug addict and alcoholic for about 25 years, has only been clean for about 7 or 8 (as far as I know) and is a master manipulator. She's an impulsive, hysterical bully. She often gets her way just by running over everything, and everyone, in her path. She has a sense of entitlement that is absolutely breathtaking. She always has a new car, designer everything, she buys her son iPads, laptops, cell phones, and then, for some reason beyond her grasp, has no money to pay her bills. So my parents do it---even though they are in their 80s and my dad is suffering from advanced heart disease, cancer and Alzheimers. And what does loser-sister do for a living? She's a loan officer at a bank. (insert obvious joke of your choice here) If it weren't for my nephew, I would never EVER speak to her again. The OP can at least say that he still loves his brother. I can't honestly say that about my sister. I really can't.
wtf is a 'baby huey'? i'm envisioning some kinda cute 'ickle cartoon version of a Vietnam War era helicopter here...
Sounds very much like my sister. An alcoholic with raging entitlement issues. Nearly drove my parents into the poor house all while drunkenly abusing us all with her lovely phone calls. But then... She became very sick in 2008. She had finally done it: Cirrhosis of the liver at 37. She continued drinking of course, but did mellow out with me. She called me to say that she didn't want any bad blood between us. She had burned so many bridges and aliented so many people, I was all she had left. Once they put her in hospice, I went down to be with her. I spent the last two days of her life with her, and watched her take her last breath. I paid for her creamation. Our own father wasn't even there. It was such a waste, and such a relief that she was finally free of this world which she clearly did not appreciate. It was also so terribly sad how she suffered, and how young she was. She was my only sibling. I guess the moral of the story is: never say never. In those last moments, I didn't care about any of the BS. It's not like I forgot or decided it was okay to treat us like that. It was that in those final moments she was so vulnerable. She was my baby sister. It just didn't matter any more. There was no reason to hold on to old hurts and resentments. So there's your warning, from the Ghost of Christmas Future, for whatever it's worth....
I wish my sisters would stop phoning me about my mother's house. My mother left the house to all four of her children with the provision that my brother should be allowed to live in it as long as he wants. He has to pay the rates, the insurance, and all the other bills associated with the house. If he decides to stop using the house as his primary residence than the house call be sold and the proceeds devided equally. My sisters keep phoning me complaining about the house - he hasn't been maintaining the garden and, according to them, inside the house is a mess. I told them I couldn't care less - I wished my mother had left him the house outright. He is an alcoholic who can't cope with life at all, so it was a foregone conclusion that he wouldn't be able to manage the house to my sisters' standard. My sisters have been in contact with the Trustees complaining and the Trustees more or less told them that he can keep the house and garden as messy as he like, so long as he does essential maintainence and pays the bills. My sisters want the house to be inspected every 3 months, the trustees say this is unreasonable and have limit it to a yearly inspection. So one sister phoned me up about that. It seems that the Trustees told them to lay off my brother as it is adding to his stress. My sisters think I am siding with my brother but I am not. i couldn't care less about him or the house. I thought that with my mother's death I would be able at last to stay out of family squabbles but my sisters keep trying to drag me into it. They never phoned me this often when my Mum was alive. Both of my sisters are better off than me financially and we all got $70,000 from Mum's will.
I am very stoned on sleeping pills right now, but want to=========remember t opost in this thread tomorrrow . Also, when you take ambien ad post the screen looks textured, like the construction paper kids make crafts out of in primary school. And also three dee and movey which makes it vry difficult to type. But i fiugre the best way to reemmber tomorro wthat I wanted to post in this thrdead is to post in it now. so I can say with eloquence what it majes me want to express. when i am less under thr influence@!
Ah yes. I wanted to say something in this thread...Lord, I really need to have my roommate hide my laptop from me after I've taken Ambien. The shit sees me posting ridiculous semi-conscious blurbs and shopping in my sleep!