ENT Caption Contest #85: We Hates the Precious!

Discussion in 'Star Trek: Enterprise' started by Skywalker, Nov 26, 2012.

  1. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    [​IMG]

    T'Pol: THE WISDOM OF SURAK WILL FREE YOUR KATRA INTO THE UNIVERSE OF INFINITE DIVERSITY IN INFINITE COMBINATIONS. IT IS SAID THAT WHEN KOHLINAR HAS BEEN ATTAINED, ONLY THEN CAN WE ANSWER THE GREAT RIDDLE OF EXISTENCE.

    Male crewman in the back: Show us your t*s!

    T'Pol: FOR LOGIC HAS EMANCIPATED - oh damn. You weren't supposed to guess it yet.
     
  2. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Confederation of Earth
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    T'Pol: Fascinating. I was not aware that human males were not...bifurcated.
     
  3. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk A Spock and a smile Premium Member

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    AI Generated Madness
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    ARCHER: T'Pol? Have you heard a single thing I've said?

    T'POL: Gotta admit, I'm pretty baked right now.
     
  4. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Confederation of Earth
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    Trip: Yeah, I know I shouldn't have had that three-bean plomeek soup. Now somebody get me some damn Pepto Bismol!
     
  5. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Three. Year. PMS.
     
  6. Skywalker

    Skywalker Admiral Admiral

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    Feb 24, 2005
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    Archer: "What the hell's going on here?!"
    T'Pol: "It would appear that Commander Tucker and Kaitaama have initiated first contact protocols."
    Reed: "Lucky bi**h..."
    Archer: "Huh?"
    Reed: "What? I said 'lucky bloke!'"
     
  7. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    The great gig in the sky
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    T'Pol: As per massive demand I will -- for the sake of crew morale -- perform what you humans call the Gangnam Style dance.
    Crewmen: Why are you wearing all those robes?
    T'Pol: To preserve what little dignity I have left.

    [​IMG]
    Reed: Wow look at those two thrash around in the mud!
    Archer: Mud-wrestling... Never gets old does it?
    T'Pol: I fail to see what is so interesting about Trip and this woman fighting in the mud.
     
  8. The Laughing Vulcan

    The Laughing Vulcan Admiral Admiral

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    Location:
    At The Laughing Vulcan's party...
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    Trineer: "Why do I have to bend over like this? All I want is to see the script for These Are The Voyages."
    Berman: "But I want you to get the full effect of what happens to your character. Drop your pants!"
     
  9. Jonas Grumby

    Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Somewhere in the South Pacific
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    Archer: "So, how do you like these new 'holodecks,' Malcolm?"
    Reed: "Actually...it's sort of boring."
    Archer: "That's just what I was thinking. Computer, generate holographic character: Sheena, Queen of the Jungle!"
    T'Pol: *sighs*
     
  10. LeadHead

    LeadHead Director of Comedy Premium Member

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    The Normandy SR-2
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    Archer: What's he doing?

    Reed: I think he's attempting re-entry, Sir.
     
  11. jespah

    jespah Taller than a Hobbit Moderator

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    Jun 21, 2011
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    Boston, the Gateway to the Galaxy
    ... and bend over Mr. Babar!

    Trinneer {singing} Moon River ....
     
  12. Triskelion

    Triskelion Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Captain got plomeek? That's crazy.
     
  13. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk A Spock and a smile Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    AI Generated Madness
  14. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    The great gig in the sky
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    Trip: Lady, your hot and all, but I'm putting you back into stasis because my other lady friend T'Pol... Well she'll sure as hell be pissed off seeing me and you together.

    [​IMG]
    Princess: I told you not to rescue me, my lover is a Vulcan and he'll rip you to pieces!
    Trip: I thought Vulcans weren't emotional?
    Princess: This one is different.
    Trip: You don't say...

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    T'Pol: Behold the Critique of Logic by Saurik of Vulcan!

    No response from the audience...

    [​IMG]
    Archer: What do you know; Travis is getting some action!
    Reed: And it ain't the combat sort either!
     
  15. Finn

    Finn Bad Batch of TrekBBS Admiral

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    Archer: This reminds me of the time I went to Africa in my 20s...
     
  16. jespah

    jespah Taller than a Hobbit Moderator

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    Boston, the Gateway to the Galaxy
    Malcolm - You did it with a gazelle, sir?
     
  17. lurok

    lurok Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

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    Lost in the EU expanse with a nice cup of tea
  18. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk A Spock and a smile Premium Member

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    AI Generated Madness
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    CARL SPOCK (o.c.): It's not mine.
     
  19. Gaith

    Gaith Vice Admiral Admiral

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    Oregon
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    Trip: Actually, shortly after your cryofreezing, humanity discovered other ways of dramatically extending life-spans. Speaking of, Captain Rushdie says he looks forward to seeing you at dinner tonight.

    Padma: !
     
  20. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk A Spock and a smile Premium Member

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    Nov 4, 2001
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    AI Generated Madness
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    Were putting you on ice for an appearance in STXII.

    Am I playing Khan?

    Sure, lets go with that.