TNG Caption This! 284: Happy 25th Anniversary TNG!

DATA: If a naked Arnold Schwarzenegger appears I'm out of here.

 

Worf: "So ... how's your neck since Tasha showed you her pimp hand?"

LaForge: "It's getting better."

 

Thanks for the pick, & congrats on the milestone



Yar: Worf, if you keep staring at my thighs, I will gut you with my combadge



Picard: You know... environmental controls? All I'm saying is it's a bit humid in here. Look at the counselor's hair, for god sake



Picard: I'm pretty sure I already know how to bowl, but thank you Lieutenant.



Worf: What do you mean there's no weapons at this station? On a Klingon vessel...

Geordi: Yeah yeah... you can fire torpedoes from the toilet. I know



Data, How would I know what it is? I'm at the helm

Worf: Uhh.... It's round

 

PICARD: I don't believe tossing one ball in the air qualifies as "juggling", Lt. Yar.

 

DATA: Captain, if the remaining debris is anything to go by, the original ship must have resembled a gigantic decorated Christmas tree.

 

Picard: Number One, I understand your flatulence problem cannot be helped but must you glance at me with pride after each emission?



Picard: I'm sorry but my first officer will be unavailable for some time; you should have told us you have a blinking bulb!



Tasha: Now, guess where the coin went?
Picard: I don't care.
Tasha: Come on, take a guess!
Picard: I don't care!!!



Geordi: So, do you see it?
Worf: No Geordi, it says "AC Delco quality parts" nowhere on the screen; perhaps you should check your visor.

 

Picard: "Yes, Groppler, we get that question a lot. But I can assure you the brevity and snugness of our women's uniforms is not evidence that we view them as sex objects! We've even produced a brochure explaining the matter. Would you like to see it? It contains some really hot pictures!"

 

Tasha's obsession with Lord Of The Rings was getting out of hand.



Worf: Captain, we appear to have crossed into some kind of alternate reality.



Stewart: Actually, I think the Captain would look better in red.

Director: Damn, now we'll have to recolour half the costumes.

 

RIKER: Imzadi, what to you make of old cue ball here? Is he a stuffed shirt or what?

TROI: Will, you're not communicating telepathically.

PICARD: Indeed.



RIKER: Imzadi, when can we blow this popcicle stand? I'm getting bored with Rambling Jean's yammering.

TROI: You're doing it again, Will.

PICARD: Indeed.

 

Worf's obsession with playing Minesweeper became so bad that other people started to notice...

 

Picard: "That's one of the worst things we've ever been through."

Troi: "I sense relief, Sir, but I am unsure of what situation you are referring to."

Picard: "The chaos is over. Sit back and enjoy, everyone. The regular refs are back."

Troi: "As I said, Sir, I am unsure of what situation you are referring to."

Picard (to self): "Well, Will is going to have to cough up a few quatloos. Apparently there is a subject that Deanna knows less about than driving."





Worf: "Well, did you hail them?"

Data: "Yes, I did, but I don't know what to make of the situation. Have you ever heard of a 'Glinda' and why would that individual tell a crew on deep space mission 'there's no place like home'?"

 

WORF: I could so do her job.

 

Picard: "Thank you for coming, ambassdor. We'll be happy to start as soon as my First Officer stops getting distracted by the TV and starts paying some attention to his damn job."

Tasha: "Invisible hull planking's in, sir."

 

Sirtis: I think you'll find that; like many a Hollywood actress; I'm not old enough to have been in a TV show 25 years ago.

 

Picard: "What are you doing here?"

Yar: "I thought you could use a hand."

 

PICARD: Keep at it Yar. You need to master "Stray Cat Strut" in time for the ship talent show!

 

Riker: "This is all your fault, Deanna."

Troi: "Me? When I introduced Worf to the concept of a man cave, I didn't think he'd go out and get one immediately and I certainly didn't think he'd take me literally."

 

The crew did unexpectedly well in their "How to Project Gravitas" class.





Worf: "On second thought, maybe Apple Maps wasn't such a good idea. Maybe we should have just stuck with the GPS that came with the ship."

 

Picard: "Astounding, isn't it?! An ancient, prehistoric culture that developed bureaucracy even before fire or the wheel! Why, this stone desk is over 24,000 years old! And that file cabinet made of animal bone..."

 

PICARD: Well Mister Wayne, in our defense, it cant be much of a secret headquarters if we found it.