TOS five word thingy!!!

, or that Scotty wouldn't notice

 

but Scotty was hypersensitive today

 

and he tended to notice

 

that women were onboard Enterprise!

 

Bagpipes, he thought, would guarantee

 

a date. Who could resist

 

a Scotsman wearing a skirt

 

and playing the greatest instrument

 

known to man? His chest

 

swelled with pride as he

 

scratched his hairy, knobby knees

 

for good luck.

"Is there

 

any way I can play

 

too?" said Nurse Chapel holding

 

what appeared to be a

 

Denebian Slime Devil. What the

 

heck was she doing with

 

contemplated all the ways he

 

could trick Uhura into doing

 

his homework, thought Chekov.

"Everyone