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Old November 12 2013, 01:36 AM   #76
teacake
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

I don't care. They should wear what they want too.
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Old November 12 2013, 02:06 AM   #77
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

teacake wrote: View Post
I don't care. They should wear what they want too.
And everyone else should have the right to state his opinion about it.


Relating this to dating... you can either hope to win the lottery, or increase your chances by going with the current trends. As Homer Simpson said: some are just not popular enough to be different.
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Old November 12 2013, 02:19 AM   #78
teacake
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

JarodRussell wrote: View Post
teacake wrote: View Post
I don't care. They should wear what they want too.
And everyone else should have the right to state his opinion about it.
Especially when the person asks you to!

Relating this to dating... you can either hope to win the lottery, or increase your chances by going with the current trends. As Homer Simpson said: some are just not popular enough to be different.
Excellent quote

Such wisdom!
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Old November 12 2013, 09:37 AM   #79
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

Kommander wrote: View Post


I totally pull it off.
Hmm, not the right style of fedora for your head...
Might have been good when you where a bit heavier, but you might want to look at fedoras with different brims and fabrics...
And get a suit that fits, lose the shine shirts but go with regular striped ones, the classic look as it where...
But also try other hats and ask other people their opinion on how it suits you...
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Old November 12 2013, 12:10 PM   #80
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

I disagree with the people getting stuck into Kommander's style. I like that combination. It's not something you see everyday (certainly not in the cultural backwater that is Canberra) and it's got a certain classiness about it.

But don't look at me for fashion. I know nuffink!
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Old November 12 2013, 12:58 PM   #81
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

I agree. The looks aren't the problem. It's a quite different kind of style:
Kommander wrote: View Post
Jesus Tittyfucking Christ again with the shallow fucking bullshit! There are plenty of things to give me shit about in this thread without resorting to this kind of stupid bullshit.
If you use this kind of language irl, it explains a lot. If you want a lady, you have to be a gentleman and not just pretend to be one. I've seen trolls and bullies on this board who used a more refined language (and indeed they had GFs).
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Old November 13 2013, 04:49 PM   #82
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

Looks like Kommander bailed once the focus became about his action plan! Identifying the problem is good, but if you're not going to address the issues, you won't resolve anything.

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Old November 13 2013, 05:06 PM   #83
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

He'll keep doing whatever he's doing, and wondering why his relationships always end in disaster.
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Old November 13 2013, 06:00 PM   #84
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

Yep. And that's kinda sad, considering how many people honestly tried to help him in this thread and the previous similar ones.
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Old November 13 2013, 06:28 PM   #85
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

Identifying the problem would be good, had he done that. Instead, it was just telling us about how amazingly self-aware and analytical he is, while not actually DOING any of that analysis to discover that the obvious things that were being pointed out may actually be valid.

Well, that and the red herring where he brought up his *interesting* fashion choices, got the expected results (it didn't look good), and then called us all shallow and vain for not praising him for it, and assholes for distracting the thread from the focus.

Which, presumably, was how awesome he is and how fucked up everyone else is, and why does the same thing keep happening to HIM? It can't be that the only common participant is related to the issue. Hard to tell on that point, because he got pretty aggressive with anyone that got close to that point. Only answers that stroked his ego were acceptable...
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Old November 13 2013, 06:34 PM   #86
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

Rhubarbodendron wrote: View Post
Yep. And that's kinda sad, considering how many people honestly tried to help him in this thread and the previous similar ones.
TrekBBS has a very poor track record with these sorts of threads, anyway. I can think of several other people who routinely (or used to) post threads about personal problems, get a flood of (often pretty sound) advice and feedback, then say it was all a joke, or no one understands the problem correctly, or they're all wrong anyway.

I pretty much expect any advice I give around to here to go down a black hole.
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Old November 13 2013, 06:43 PM   #87
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

I know the way the thread was handled was kind of frustrating, but it's not really kosher to dogpile on the guy when he's not even replying to the thread any more (this is not directed at anyone in particular, just a general comment). I'm gonna close it down, but if Kommander decides he wants to reopen it to reply (hopefully in a more productive manner) he can PM me.
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Old November 13 2013, 11:33 PM   #88
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

Reopened at OP's request.
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Old November 14 2013, 01:30 AM   #89
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

Time to make the hole I've dug myself into even deeper. Now where's my damn shovel?

I've noticed two major problems that turned this thread into the clusterfuck it became.

1: Miscommunication. Mostly my fault. The situation I described with the girl I met at school and her ex was meant to be an example of the issue I wanted to discuss: jealous, possessive people and how to deal with them. The ex apparently marking his territory caught my attention, so I started thinking about times in the past when dealing with jealous, possessive people. Those situations ended less than desirably for me, so I decided to ask others about it. I wanted to discuss the circumstances in general, but others wanted to discuss the example specifically. I got confused, and wondered what the hell happened.

2: The existence of "this type of thread." Everyone has expectations of this type of thread. Specifically, the OP being an ass and not listening to anyone. I was trying to poke fun at that perception a bit, but it was poorly executed and I just ended up looking like an especially big ass. You guys probably decided I was being an ass before even opening the thread, so there's no way I could win.

As for the hostile, condescending posts that a lot of you have made: Does that ever work when trying to convince someone they're wrong? Are you ever convinced when someone argues with you that way? I doubt it. When I did the same thing back no one retracted what they said and told me I was right, I was just accused of being egotistical and not listening to anything anyone had to say. So, it's bad when I do it but it's okay when anyone else does it because, why, I'm not as good as other people? Is that what I should take from this?

I've got more to say, but I've been up since 3am and I'm getting tired. I didn't want to wait too long after the thread was reopened to say something though. One more thing:

Scout101 wrote: View Post
Well, that and the red herring where he brought up his *interesting* fashion choices, got the expected results (it didn't look good), and then called us all shallow and vain for not praising him for it, and assholes for distracting the thread from the focus.
This is a good example of what I don't understand about this thread. I mentioned it off-handedly originally, and then people began focusing on it. I figured they were thinking "typical neckbearded Men's Rights Advocate," so I posted a picture to show that I was something other than that. I never expected praise for the way I dress, you and others just assumed I did. I got irritated because people were focusing on it excessively, not because they were saying negative things. I'm not going to claim that I'm perfect, but a lot of the shit I've gotten in this thread is because of the shit-giver's own flawed perception. Seriously, some of the wild speculating you people have done makes just as much sense as me thinking the ex marking his territory was aimed at me specifically; vaguely plausible but probably not actually true.
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Old November 14 2013, 02:01 AM   #90
Melakon
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Re: Angst-Ridden Dating Rant #17

Kommander wrote: View Post
1: Miscommunication. Mostly my fault. The situation I described with the girl I met at school and her ex was meant to be an example of the issue I wanted to discuss: jealous, possessive people and how to deal with them. The ex apparently marking his territory caught my attention, so I started thinking about times in the past when dealing with jealous, possessive people.
The problem I had with the original post was all the Odin stuff made you sound like a lunatic, and then having to sift through all that to find what you really wanted to talk about.

Your description of the situation with the boyfriend made it sound as if you were the jealous and possessive one, not him, because of how you interpreted a photograph. You were even wondering if you should tell the guy to back off, when you hadn't even made a first move toward dating the girl. If the guy had posted the photograph with a caption like "Back off, Kommander," you might have reason to think the picture was meant for you personally, but it sounds more like you're reading more things into it than there really was.
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