VOY Caption This 98; Con and Conditionality

[T'Girl]

Janeway: "A considerable amount of ship's resources went into building this thing, what's it supposed to do again?"

Seven: "According to Mr. Paris, if I stand in front of these ultraviolet rays for several minutes per day, in no time I will take on the appearance of something that is referred to as a California girl"

[JirinPanthosa]

Janeway welcomes the first sentient plant in Starfleet into her crew, and falls madly in love.



Kullah's twin sister declares her undying love for Neelix.



DOCTOR: I came up with a treatment that will put a stop to Vorik's Pon Farr. I'd give it to him, but I want to see how far he goes first.
JANEWAY: Make sure the holo-recorders are running.



JANEWAY: So that's where we left the Borg baby.
SEVEN: Shall I commence fumigating the room?



Species 8112 was the first race to voluntarily join the collective, because they were tired of other races thinking they were zombies.

[Triskelion]

Captain's log, supplemental: never ask for an alien tea recipe!




Neelix: A shipment of aphrodisiac for a database of naked crew pictures. Deal.
Kazon: How will you get them to ingest the drug?
Neelix: I don't know. I'll call it some kind of herbal root. Dumbasses.




EMH: You might be interested to know that Lieutenant Vorik shouted out your name during Pon Farr - before he burst out crying.

Janeway: I still got it.



Seven: It is a play about my time in the Borg. I call it The VGer Monologues.

Janeway: Neelix reviewed it "The hottest existential performance since Bondage Babes of Boreth."

[hux]

Janeway: why the hell can't Neelix just make soup for once



Kazon: i've literally just met you.....and i'm already irritated



Doctor: Whenever i press this button...he takes a dump



Janeway: so it's 2 girls and a cup i'm gonna see, right
Seven: Just keep watching



Janeway: keep talking Neelix, it's working

[Cmdr.Druss]

Recently leaked onto the internet were JJ Abrahms original plans for next Star Trek movie. A return to the prime universe and cross over with a cult classic, titled 'Star Trek: Day of the Triffids'

[Nerys Myk]

JANEWAY: With this plant being such a mish-mash of species, there's got to be coffee in here somewhere!

[LeadHead]

Janeway: Okay, I'm sorry that I forgot to water you!



Neelix: So, change of plans, everybody RSVPed, then canceled when they realized I'd be here.


EMH: My experiment is going well, I'm testing to see how long a Vulcan will maintain composure while I blast Klingon Opera over the speakers.

Janeway: Thank you for working on this Doctor, next we'll test how much Klingons like root canals.



Janeway: Seven, how long will you be keeping Mr. Kim in there?

Seven: Until the writers stop writing the romance storyline for us.

[Eydie Munroe]

Gil T.Azell wrote:

---

Even the Borg got tired of waiting for the Leafs to win the cup.!

I'm not the judge, but this is a win!

[Eydie Munroe]

Indiana Jones: Adios, amigo.

Next caption contest is on the 18th of January!

Have fun![/QUOTE]

[Triskelion]

Captain's Log, Supplemental: The Hair Bun Tree of Nernala VII is just not worth the trouble. I'm going back to the Ronco Hair Weasel.




Neelix: For people who obsess about hygiene, humans are remarkably lax about bathwater in the stew.




EMH: His "Pon Farr" turned out to be constipation. It seems Neelix's Taco Tuesdays do not agree with the Vulcan colon.

Janeway: That explains why there is no Starfleet medical record of the unholy smell.

EMH: Pity, I was going to write a paper on the syndrome called "Pon Farrting."




What is it, Seven?

The Borg searched for the perfect male enhancement element for centuries. We called it "The Viagara Particle." I believe I have isolated it, Captain.

Don't just stand there, put it in the ventilation system.

[Ln X]

The next caption contest will be coming up shortly in a few hours time!

[Ln X]

The next caption contest is up!