Borg tribble subplot?

[{ Emilia }]

Ok, so here's the deal:

In the Prime Universe the tribbles have been all but extinguished by the Klingons... apart from a couple of tribbles who happened to fall into the hands of the Borg. So the assimilated tribbles create a time vortex and head to the JJ-Verse to have their revenge. The Federation's tribble expert Worf (one of the few who have seen a tribble before during his time on DS9) tries to stop them but eventually just gets dragged into the same time vortex.

After their arrival in the JJVerse the borg tribble ship encounters the USS Fahrenheit under Captain Rob'Oh. The borg tribbles attack and nearly destroy the Fahrenheit. Rob'Oh orders the evacuation of the damaged starship, then sacrificing himself by going on a collision course with the furry Borg sphere.

The rest of the movie sees the destruction of Qo'nos as an act of tribble revenge, Worf meeting his own grandfather (Benedict Cumberbatch as one of those ridgeless Klingons), a lot of lens flares, Sulu wielding an axe, and a couple of Beastie Boys songs.

The movie ends with the surviving tribbles looking at their secret plans to the Tribble Empire’s ultimate weapon, the DEATH FURBALL, an armored space station with enough power to destroy an entire planet.

[Kestrel]

{ Emilia } wrote:

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The movie ends with the surviving tribbles looking at their secret plans to the Tribble Empire’s ultimate weapon, the DEATH FURBALL, an armored space station with enough power to destroy an entire planet.

You know, this makes me realize that what actually happened when the Klingons attacked the Tribbles was even more complicated than we thought.

See, here's the truth. The Tribbles are basically Ewoks without arms or legs or faces, right (credit to Emilia for that realization)? The actual truth is though, it's not just a coincidence - tribbles *are* Ewoks, albeit in the larval stage. The little(r) ones we see in Jedi are the pupae. The tribble homeworld is on the other side of an interdimensional gateway from Endor where the Ewoks lay their fuzzy little eggs.

So, after their humiliating defeat thanks to the help of stone age teddy bears, the remaining Imperial forces were concentrated on wiping out all that remained of the Ewoks, and found themselves on the other side of the Gateway. Problem is, they went through the gateway and forward in time at exactly the moment the Klingons arrived to wipe out the Tribble homeworld.

Now of course, the Klingon Chancellor couldn't abide letting somebody else having the honor of wiping out his greatest foe, so the Imperial and Klingon fleets had themselves a tussling and in the aftermath the gate was sealed with the last tribble wiped out. The Klingons vowed to never speak of this again, of course, but now you know the truth.

[Robert Maxwell]

So what you're saying is, JJ Abrams didn't turn Star Trek into Star Wars, Ron Moore did.

Man, and you thought people hated him for nuBSG. Wait until they get a load of this.

[Kestrel]

Pretty much! Sorry folks, that ship sailed 15 years ago.

Besides, just imagine if Moore was the one following up with this movie - Cumberbatch would be a tribble!

[{ Emilia }]

Kestrel wrote:

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Besides, just imagine if Moore was the one following up with this movie - Cumberbatch would be a tribble!

He certainly has the hair.

[Robert Maxwell]

Kestrel wrote:

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Pretty much! Sorry folks, that ship sailed 15 years ago.

Besides, just imagine if Moore was the one following up with this movie - Cumberbatch would be a tribble!

A renegade tribble as the central villain is about as dark and edgy as it gets. I think both Abrams and his detractors simply lack vision in this area.

[Kestrel]

{ Emilia } wrote:

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He certainly has the hair.

Robert Maxwell wrote:

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A renegade tribble as the central villain is about as dark and edgy as it gets. I think both Abrams and his detractors simply lack vision in this area.

It also explains his superpowers - if tribbles develop to live in the Wars verse, then clearly they have a connection to the Force, and thus Human Tribbles should have no problem developing Jedi powers. Then we'll get to see the Klingon ragtag fleet led by an aging Bird of Prey fleeing the Death Furball in movie three!

[{ Emilia }]

Will we get to see a scene showing Bones checking the tribble midichlorian count?
My guess is they're off the chart.

Are midichlorians canon in Star Trek?

[Kestrel]

BONES: Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor not a veterinarian!
KIRK: <deadpan stare>
BONES: <sheepish grin> Oh, right.


Audience: HAHAHAHAHA (intended)

[SeerSGB]

Thanks to the loyal sacrifice of many Bothan agents, we now have the first pick of the real villain of STID.



Knew Cumberbatch was just a smokescreen.

[Kathryn Janeway]

By the way, are the children of a borg-tribble borg-tribbles or normal tribbles?
If they're just tribbles then the borg might have a problem to assimilate them fast enough and get their own tribble problem.

[R. Star]

Borg Tribbles...

[Jackson_Roykirk]

SeerSGB wrote:

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Thanks to the loyal sacrifice of many Bothan agents, we now have the first pick of the real villain of STID.

Hey, do you know what I find hilarious? Bothans.
What? Too soon?

[{ Emilia }]

Rumour has it we'll get to see a very prolific cameo appearance.

[Set Harth]

He's checking for birth certificates.