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Old December 1 2012, 08:46 PM   #196
JarodRussell
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

Tora Ziyal wrote: View Post
And then there's the opposite: "It will get better." No, it may get better, but it may not.

[...]

And my pet peeve of the day: variations on "I know exactly how you feel," "I totally understand," etc. Well, no, you don't. And you just proved it by what you said next.
Well, how about hearing the opposite?

"I don't understand. And it may get even worse."
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Old December 1 2012, 10:15 PM   #197
Tora Ziyal
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

LOL Actually, I'd rather have someone admit that they don't completely understand than make a pretense that they do and then prove that they don't. Except usually people who say they totally understand really believe that they do, because they know (or at least they think they know) how they would react. They forget that not everyone reacts the same way to the same situation.
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Old December 2 2012, 01:31 AM   #198
auntiehill
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

I wish people would just say, "Wow, that really sucks; I'm sorry that happened to you."
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Old December 2 2012, 02:21 AM   #199
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

^Amen.
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Old December 2 2012, 02:42 AM   #200
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

I give people a pass in situations like that because there's often not anything good to say, and a whole lot of bad things. Personally when I'm struggling with something I can keep it together until someone is sympathetic towards me and vocalizes that. So I hate that, but I don't expect people to know that about me either.
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Old December 2 2012, 02:56 AM   #201
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

Yeah, I do that sometimes, too, Kestra. I mean hold myself together until someone is sympathetic. Depending on who that someone is, I may feel relieved or just foolish.
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Old December 2 2012, 02:13 PM   #202
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

auntiehill wrote: View Post
I wish people would just say, "Wow, that really sucks; I'm sorry that happened to you."
And then walk away because they know you don't want to hear anything else from them anyway.
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Old December 2 2012, 07:17 PM   #203
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

No, you then hug the person and let the person talk if they want to.
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Old December 2 2012, 07:25 PM   #204
JarodRussell
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

auntiehill wrote: View Post
No, you then hug the person and let the person talk if they want to.
But we don't want to hear any forms of "I understand", "It could be worse" and "It will get better" during that.

You guys are condemning people for trying to let you know that they care with the basic sayings everyone fucking says in these situations. "It's gonna be alright", and stuff like that. Man, miserable people can be so damn egoistical at times.
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Old December 2 2012, 07:40 PM   #205
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

A saying doesn't get any less annoying, or more justified, the more people say it. If anything, the opposite applies.
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Old December 2 2012, 07:42 PM   #206
JarodRussell
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

Mr. Laser Beam wrote: View Post
A saying doesn't get any less annoying, or more justifies, the more people say it. If anything, the opposite applies.
What's annoying for you doesn't have to be annoying for others. There's no facts here, only opinions. And blaming people for using sayings you personally don't like is pretty arrogant.

That said, I'll keep saying "It's gonna be alright" and "It will get better" when someone is in trouble.
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Old December 2 2012, 08:55 PM   #207
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

I don't think Mr Laserbeam meant to blame people for using sayings he dislikes. What he meant, I believe, is that sometimes there is a phrase that you really dislike. And if it's a popular one and lots of people say it all the time, it gets even more annoying. It's like screeching chalk on a blackboard. Once in a while is bad enough, but imagine you'll have to hear it all day long...

While "it's gonna be allright / will get better" is a comfort at times, in a situation that you are certain won't improve its use is not really appreciated. It always depends on the situation. For example, it would be pretty foolish to say it to someone who's on the verge of dying. It might, however, be helpful with a kid who fell and hurt a knee.

The problem is, imo, that many people use those phrases without thinking. It's just like saying "Gesundheit!" when someone sneezes. It's something you do automatically, because it's what one does. But you don't consider first that it means "good health to you!" and then very deliberately wish that to the sneezing person.

Thoughtless phrases, if recognized as such, can hurt more than insults because they indirectly tell us that the other person doesn't really care about us but reacts only automatically and without conscious thinking.

If you manage to put some feelings behind the words, it's a completely different matter. Then it's really a comfort
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Old December 2 2012, 11:30 PM   #208
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

"All you do is fuck around on the computer all day" / "All you do is play games on the computer all day" - Yep, that's exactly what I get paid for by clients to do, fuck around on the comp all day. Soon as I finish this brochure that I got the contract on two days ago and is do tomorrow, update this online catalog, and do about 3 hours a day of online classes for new certifications, I'll get back to that game of Star Trek Online you say me playing on my lunch break for all of 15 minutes before the phone rang.

"Working from home is so easy, all you do is sit around and get paid to do jack shit, you got it made." - just fucking die already, please. I'll trade my contract to contract freelance (and dwindling) income for your week to week paycheck with benefits, then you can sit at home trying to drum up contracts, deal with the headaches of clients that know piss all about what they want, then sweat when some client fucks up legally and you find out when they call in a panic about legal threats and, oh by the way, they've put you in the middle cause you did the work for them.
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Old December 3 2012, 12:37 AM   #209
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

Seer, I totally agree. As a freelance video editor it can be up or down in the jobs department. I love when my mom Skype's me and wants to go on and on and I'm like I have to get back to work and she's all, "you work from home and have plenty of time to chat."
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Old December 3 2012, 12:50 AM   #210
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Re: Sayings that you hate now

I know plenty of people who work from home that aren't freelance. I wouldn't conflate the two.
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