Sayings that you hate now

[Jim Gamma]

"Because you need it." <- the explanation given to me when I used to ask why I had to have extra time on exams at primary school or use a laptop to type instead of writing, etc. (It turned out to be because I have crap eyesight. I only discovered the full reason for this when I had to sign a form saying I had the syndrome that causes my multisensory impairment at age 18, and hadn't even heard of it...)

[Deranged Nasat]

Another one I hate: "life isn't fair". Not the saying itself, but the situations in which it's used. So often I hear it agressively applied to a context that's entirely within the purview of human society, where there's every reason why things can and should be fair, and every reason why things should be arranged so that deprivation and struggle are minimized.

If someone complains because lightning struck a tree and it fell on their car by saying "it's not fair!", then by all means point out "life isn't fair", because it isn't. The natural world doesn't and simply cannot run on the basis of fairness, however we're defining it. If they suffer deprivation or struggle because of uncontrollable natural events, and wind up the only one who suffers such due to unfortunate luck, then, yes, their complaining is pointless and "life's not fair" is a valid response. But when someone's been inconvenienced by a social system that could easily be more cooperative, supportive and, well, fair-minded, it seems both distasteful and dishonest to apply "life's not fair" as though the person in question were whining about something that Simply Is.

Basically, it annoys me when people confuse the way the universe works with the way society works and act as if the second is as inevitable and unchallengable as the former.

[Robert Maxwell]

"Double down" and variations. This bit of gambling jargon slipped into the American political lexicon this year and seemed to be used in almost every single news article about our elections. So-and-so "doubled down" on such-and-such. Please, make it stop. Fortunately, the election is over so I'm not seeing that phrase anymore. Perhaps it has gone the way of the term "political football."

"That's unnatural." Usually used to denigrate people that the speaker doesn't like, such as gay folks. So is wearing synthetic fibers, eating processed food, and taking pharmaceutical medications. But you don't hear people shouting from the rooftops about all that, do you? Something being "unnatural" only seems to matter when pushing a moralistic agenda on others.

My mother's favorite: "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out." The emptiest of empty threats!

[macloudt]

Just thought of another one: "Giving 110%". I'm terrible at math, yet this saying makes me twitch. I'd hate to see what it does to actual mathematicians.

[Tora Ziyal]

"Everything happens for a reason."

Well, yeah, everything has a cause. But most people who say this mean that there's some deliberate purpose for this thing to have happened, like the universe did it deliberately, and therefore this horrendous thing is somehow good for you. Grrrrr.

And, related to that...

"God never gives us more than we can handle."

Oh yeah? Aside from the questionable theology... If it were true, there'd be a lot less alcohol abuse, fewer suicides, and less work for psychotherapists.

[Ood Sigma]

I've got two that are bugging me at the moment: "I know, right?" and "I'm not going to lie, ..." Both phrases drive me up the wall. It's probably because I've mostly heard them used in an arrogant context.

Bonus: Internet posts consisting of the single word "This." If you have nothing new to add, why bother posting? Or if you absolutely have to point out your agreement, why not say "I agree with you."?

[Robert Maxwell]

Ood Sigma wrote:

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I've got two that are bugging me at the moment: "I know, right?" and "I'm not going to lie, ..." Both phrases drive me up the wall. It's probably because I've mostly heard them used in an arrogant context.

Bonus: Internet posts consisting of the single word "This." If you have nothing new to add, why bother posting? Or if you absolutely have to point out your agreement, why not say "I agree with you."?

This.

(Sorry. )

[Ood Sigma]

^ I'm not going to lie, I was absolutely 110% positive that someone would do that.

[Deranged Nasat]

Ood Sigma wrote:

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^ I'm not going to lie, I was absolutely 110% positive that someone would do that.

[Robert Maxwell]

Ood Sigma wrote:

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^ I'm not going to lie, I was absolutely 110% positive that someone would do that.

What can I say? YOLO!

[macloudt]

Tora Ziyal wrote:

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"God never gives us more than we can handle."

Oh yeah? Aside from the questionable theology... If it were true, there'd be a lot less alcohol abuse, fewer suicides, and less work for psychotherapists.

Oh, man, I HATE this one. It's so incredibly patronising. More often than not the person spewing this nonsense has no idea what the intended recipient is going through.

[Gul Re'jal]

Deranged Nasat wrote:

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I also dislike that one. Especially because it often seems to imply an accusation of selfishness, as though by discussing your own suffering you're somehow discounting other people's - when you're doing no such thing, and instead it's the person saying this who's discounting yours.

And when it's accompanied by its best friend "It will/is going to be OK, you'll see"... Oh, that could put me into a murderous mood. 1. You can't know that for sure; 2. It's not OK now; 3. Can you give me the date so that I know how long I am going to wait?; 4. And until then, shall I sit on the stairs and wait? (lovely, especially when your situation is serious, like lack of a job, or difficult housing situation, or debts, etc.)

It never cheered my up; it always made me feel me and my problems are being dismissed and not taken seriously.

[B.J.]

auntiehill wrote:

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"BECAUSE I SAID SO, THAT'S WHY!"

Anyone who has ever dealt with kids has probably said this at some point, or at least heard it when they were kids. I try very hard not to say it to my nieces and nephew because it's a total BS line.

I'll admit that my wife and I have said this on occasion. Sometimes they get you so frustrated that it's all you can say. Other times it's because you don't want to give the real reason because it's an inappropriate subject or something. And occasionally, you just don't know!

[Rhubarbodendron]

"no smoke without fire"
Apart from the fact that apparently the person who coined that phrase never forgot a bunch of cookies in the oven it's also incredibly unfair as it implies rumours are always true. They aren't! And forgetting that can cause so much harm!

A close friend of mine was libeled badly on a message board: he was supposed to meet with a girl he had met online and at the last minute she got cold feet and decided to take the very next flight home again. She didn't tell my friend, though. He had no idea why she didn't turn up, got worried and had her be paged at the airport. So they finally met after all, talked and left quite amicably.
Later, however, she spread the rumour that he had attacked her and she'd had to call the airport security. Some fools believed it and my friend got banned by the board administration. He registered under a different name to defend himself and immediately got banned again. After a few rounds of this he was so furious that he started trolling wherever he could. Not really surprising.
8 years after the incident the girl finally admitted to the libel but it was too late: my friend has a bad rep, suffers from persecution mania (he received death threats from board members!) and cathegorically refuses to post anywhere. A big loss as he was a rather interesting poster.

And all of this because a few people believed in this "no smoke without fire" nonsense. It makes me so furiuous!!

[auntiehill]

I have always hated "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
(cue crappy-ass pop song)
I call BULLSHIT. What doesn't kill you leaves you scarred and limping; don't try to sell it like it's a good thing. It's people trying to make suffering sound like a good thing and it's not. That's why we call it "suffering" and not "fun." If I get hit by a truck or get cancer, that doesn't make me stronger. It weakens me physically and maybe even mentally or emotionally. If I survive it, then good for me but don't sell me the "see how strong you are now?" bullshit.

Just acknowledge that I suffered and say, "Gee, that happened to you? That really sucks," because, yeah, it does.