TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! - Page 2

Holdfast · October 8 2012, 02:18 PM

It was fun being a guest judge; thanks for the opportunity and sorry for being a bit late in getting back to you with my choice!

RIKER (thinking): Damn him. No-one outposes me.

CRUSHER: The used tissues in Wesley's bedroom were piled this high.

EDO: The worst thing about these clothes? The tan lines.

DATA (offscreen): Good colouring.
PICARD: That's bone. And the lettering is something called Silian Rail.

DIRECTOR (offscreen): Cut!
PATRICK STEWART: That's it! End of season wrap-party! Destroy all the sets!

Jonas Grumby · October 8 2012, 02:33 PM

Data: "Hold on! Our damaged auto pilot thinks we just hit Albuquerque, and she's turning left!"

The Laughing Vulcan · October 8 2012, 03:50 PM

Wow! Thanks for the win(s). I've probably blown all my reserve of humorous in just one week...

Riker: "So the last Federation contact this world had was from the... Starship Excelsior?"
Beata os: "commanded by Captain Hikaru Sulu. Why?"

Picard: "That's not the official Arnold J Rimmer salute, Doctor. Nothing less will suffice on my ship!"

Riker: "How do you guys... I mean, this is a planet full of the liberally dressed, flesh on show... so how do the planet's males..."
Worf: "... avoid 'tenting'?"
Man: "Not a problem, all the men on the planet are impotent. We haven't been able to satisfy our women in generations. If it weren't for IVF..."
Riker: "I thought it would be impossible for me to like this planet more..."
Yar: "Commander?"
Riker: "I was wrong."

Picard: "What would this object be for, historian?"
Whelan : "That? That would be a 'business card'. In the days before automated street sanitation, it was used to scrape shit from shoes."

Data: "Ship's inertial dampeners are failing, Captain."
Picard: "Note in ship's log, commendation due to the ship's engineer for his auxiliary dampeners in the Captain's seat idea... also evasive action."

Let's try this again...

Worf: "Ever... mated with a Klingon?"
Yar: "Classy!"

Triskelion · October 10 2012, 04:31 AM

R. Star · October 10 2012, 11:05 PM

William T. Riker- Men, women, aliens, androgynous beings, potted plants... if it has an orifice he can get into, he's all over it.

Picard: Well done Doctor, you're quite talented at the Picard Maneuver. We'll continue practicing at 1800 tomorrow. Bring more viagra.
Crusher: Aye, aye, captain.

Worf: Klingon women have better cleavage.

Picard: I'm not a spying pervert. It's a legitimate profession dating back to ancient Earth history! See?

Picard: This is intolerable... how long do we have to put up with Wesley learning to drive? Isn't there anyone else we can use?!
Riker: Well Geordi's busy in engineering, Yar's dead so Worf had to take over tactical. Troi's not doing anything...

Jonas Grumby · October 11 2012, 12:12 AM

Dix: "Mr. Jones? You don't know me, but I'm Dixon Hill, private investigator. Now, traditionally, we private eyes only work for clients who have explicitly hired us. But in these tough economic times, we've had to start scaring up business on our own. To that purpose, I took it upon myself to take some snapshots of your wife screwing your best friend. Interested?"

Isis · October 11 2012, 12:59 PM

The combination of lens flare and the captain's bald head could be very difficult on the eyes.

There was good news and bad news when Picard tried the phone number on the card. The good news: It was now a phone sex line. The bad news: That month's phone bill.

Jonas Grumby · October 11 2012, 02:51 PM

Crusher: "You have to be at least this tall to ride this ride."

Isis · October 12 2012, 04:43 PM

In the 24th Century, humanity had conquered hunger and could go to the galaxy's edge...

...But nobody had thought to install seat belts on starships.

Triskelion · October 12 2012, 09:12 PM

Kolvoord Starburst, Cap'n.

Honorable Ensign · October 13 2012, 01:25 AM

Riker: Hands on both hips? Nah, I'll never figure that out.

Picard was always willing for a quick "high five, down low--too slow" trick.

Picard: Look at this! The whole box is ruined!
Data: Actually, sir, as explained upthread, the double capital PR is a legitimate historical--
Picard: Too late; already ordered more cards.

Isis · October 13 2012, 03:20 AM

Even Data wasn't immune from the effects of bad Plomeek.

Isis · October 13 2012, 03:28 AM

Riker (to self): "That guy can't get over himself in the new uniform. But just wait till they get to the 'Rs.' He won't feel so awesome next to me."

Nerys Myk · October 13 2012, 06:37 AM

PICARD: Good lord people, it was just a slight bump. Overreact much?

Isis · October 13 2012, 04:56 PM

LeadHead, are you going to keep this contest up till at least tomorrow? I wanted to do some photoshops, but my week has been rather, let's say, "atypical." Today, I'll have a bit more time. Thanks, Ann Dorian (aka Isis)

October 8 2012, 02:18 PM	#16
Holdfast Procul, O procul este profani! Location: 17 Cherry Tree Lane	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! It was fun being a guest judge; thanks for the opportunity and sorry for being a bit late in getting back to you with my choice! RIKER (thinking): Damn him. No-one outposes me. CRUSHER: The used tissues in Wesley's bedroom were piled this high. EDO: The worst thing about these clothes? The tan lines. DATA (offscreen): Good colouring. PICARD: That's bone. And the lettering is something called Silian Rail. DIRECTOR (offscreen): Cut! PATRICK STEWART: That's it! End of season wrap-party! Destroy all the sets! __________________ Get into Medicine UK - free advice & information about medicine & medical school

October 8 2012, 02:33 PM	#17
Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Location: Somewhere in the South Pacific	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! Data: "Hold on! Our damaged auto pilot thinks we just hit Albuquerque, and she's turning left!" __________________ "There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer

October 8 2012, 03:50 PM	#18
The Laughing Vulcan Admiral Location: At The Laughing Vulcan's party...	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! Wow! Thanks for the win(s). I've probably blown all my reserve of humorous in just one week... Riker: "So the last Federation contact this world had was from the... Starship Excelsior?" Beata os: "commanded by Captain Hikaru Sulu. Why?" Picard: "That's not the official Arnold J Rimmer salute, Doctor. Nothing less will suffice on my ship!" Riker: "How do you guys... I mean, this is a planet full of the liberally dressed, flesh on show... so how do the planet's males..." Worf: "... avoid 'tenting'?" Man: "Not a problem, all the men on the planet are impotent. We haven't been able to satisfy our women in generations. If it weren't for IVF..." Riker: "I thought it would be impossible for me to like this planet more..." Yar: "Commander?" Riker: "I was wrong." Picard: "What would this object be for, historian?" Whelan : "That? That would be a 'business card'. In the days before automated street sanitation, it was used to scrape shit from shoes." Data: "Ship's inertial dampeners are failing, Captain." Picard: "Note in ship's log, commendation due to the ship's engineer for his auxiliary dampeners in the Captain's seat idea... also evasive action." Let's try this again... Worf: "Ever... mated with a Klingon?" Yar: "Classy!" __________________ "Don't try to live so wise. Don't cry 'cause you're so right. Don't dry with fakes or fears, 'Cause you will hate yourself in the end." Anime @ MyReviewer

October 10 2012, 04:31 AM	#19
Triskelion Commodore Location: Across a sea of suns	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! __________________ Star Trek Voyager: Shock Nova Flicker Burn Theater Presents: Zontar the Thing from Venus

October 10 2012, 11:05 PM	#20
R. Star Commodore Location: Terra 3	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! William T. Riker- Men, women, aliens, androgynous beings, potted plants... if it has an orifice he can get into, he's all over it. Picard: Well done Doctor, you're quite talented at the Picard Maneuver. We'll continue practicing at 1800 tomorrow. Bring more viagra. Crusher: Aye, aye, captain. Worf: Klingon women have better cleavage. Picard: I'm not a spying pervert. It's a legitimate profession dating back to ancient Earth history! See? Picard: This is intolerable... how long do we have to put up with Wesley learning to drive? Isn't there anyone else we can use?! Riker: Well Geordi's busy in engineering, Yar's dead so Worf had to take over tactical. Troi's not doing anything... __________________ "I was never a Star Trek fan." J.J. Abrams

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October 11 2012, 12:12 AM	#21
Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Location: Somewhere in the South Pacific	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! Dix: "Mr. Jones? You don't know me, but I'm Dixon Hill, private investigator. Now, traditionally, we private eyes only work for clients who have explicitly hired us. But in these tough economic times, we've had to start scaring up business on our own. To that purpose, I took it upon myself to take some snapshots of your wife screwing your best friend. Interested?" __________________ "There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer

October 11 2012, 12:59 PM	#22
Isis Commodore	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! The combination of lens flare and the captain's bald head could be very difficult on the eyes. There was good news and bad news when Picard tried the phone number on the card. The good news: It was now a phone sex line. The bad news: That month's phone bill.

October 11 2012, 02:51 PM	#23
Jonas Grumby Vice Admiral Location: Somewhere in the South Pacific	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! Crusher: "You have to be at least this tall to ride this ride." __________________ "There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer

October 12 2012, 04:43 PM	#24
Isis Commodore	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! In the 24th Century, humanity had conquered hunger and could go to the galaxy's edge... ...But nobody had thought to install seat belts on starships.

October 12 2012, 09:12 PM	#25
Triskelion Commodore Location: Across a sea of suns	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! Kolvoord Starburst, Cap'n. __________________ Star Trek Voyager: Shock Nova Flicker Burn Theater Presents: Zontar the Thing from Venus

October 13 2012, 01:25 AM	#26
Honorable Ensign Commander	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! Riker: Hands on both hips? Nah, I'll never figure that out. Picard was always willing for a quick "high five, down low--too slow" trick. Picard: Look at this! The whole box is ruined! Data: Actually, sir, as explained upthread, the double capital PR is a legitimate historical-- Picard: Too late; already ordered more cards. __________________ I don't care if I'm apathetic.

October 13 2012, 03:20 AM	#27
Isis Commodore	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! Even Data wasn't immune from the effects of bad Plomeek.

October 13 2012, 03:28 AM	#28
Isis Commodore	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! Riker (to self): "That guy can't get over himself in the new uniform. But just wait till they get to the 'Rs.' He won't feel so awesome next to me."

October 13 2012, 06:37 AM	#29
Nerys Myk Admiral Location: House of Kang, now with ridges	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! PICARD: Good lord people, it was just a slight bump. Overreact much? __________________ Nerys Myk's Midnight In Never Land A novel of Dark Fantasy @ Amazon.com

October 13 2012, 04:56 PM	#30
Isis Commodore	Re: TNG Caption This! 286: Power to the Players: The Sequel! LeadHead, are you going to keep this contest up till at least tomorrow? I wanted to do some photoshops, but my week has been rather, let's say, "atypical." Today, I'll have a bit more time. Thanks, Ann Dorian (aka Isis)