Cap Con 82: A Singular Obsession

[Nerys Myk]

But First, after some delay, the WINNERS!

Good News Bad News Award

Mistral wrote:

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Phlox: "This is a good news/bad news kind of thing. The good news is, you don't have testicular cancer. The bad news is you don't have testicles either."

TSA Has Nothing On Them Award.

CorporalCaptain wrote:

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General Gosis: As you can see, our immigration and customs services are overstaffed. Despite having scanned your bodies using radiation of theoretically every type and wavelength - and found nothing - it will be necessary to perform deep cavity searches. Searching by hand for contraband this thoroughly is good for the morale of the men. Afterwards, we would be happy to discuss the possibility of trade with your planet.

Snapshot Award

Jonas Grumby wrote:

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Phlox: "Just another second. Let me set the focus, then I'll snap the picture."
Trip: "Hurry up, Doc. I think I feel the little glasses-and-beard thingie slipping!"

Its Pronounce "Ven Gach" Award

Gep Malakai wrote:

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REED: "A planet of Van Goghs. Who would have thought?"

An Elegant Weapon Photoshop Award

Starpaul20 wrote:

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Your Prize:

[Nerys Myk]

And Now the pics for this contest:

[Finn]

Phlox: You are done! How do you feel?

Mayweather: Aye sir! Full impulse

[Mistral]

Thanks for the win!-Mistral

Finn wrote:

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Mayweather: "But why am I your practice dummy?"

Phlox: "It's not like you have anything else to do around here..."

[Kirby]

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Trip: Why are we doing this? Well let's just say that Porthos isn't the only one on the ship that has problems digesting cheese. Every few days I come in with some compressed air attach it to this special nozzle down here and blow out the Captain's chair. Otherwise if it builds up too much and someone sits down too hard we have to clear the bridge.

[LeadHead]

Engineer: Commander, why are you installing a whoopie cushion?



Mayweather: What are you doing?

Phlox: Just as I thought.

Mayweather: What? Is it serious?

Phlox: Quite serious, I just got a text that you're getting an episode built around you, named "Horizon."



Archer: Don't make fun of gazelles!



Archer: Why are you still working on that?

Trip: The faster engineering team doesn't arrive until Tuesday.

[Skywalker]

LeadHead wrote:

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Mayweather: What are you doing?

Phlox: Just as I thought.

Mayweather: What? Is it serious?

Phlox: Quite serious, I just got a text that you're getting an episode built around you, named "Horizon."

Mayweather: "You mean...?"
Phlox: "I'm afraid so. Emotional beats, dialogue consisting of more than three or four words at a time, the works. There's even going to be an impassioned speech!"
Mayweather: "This won't end well."
Phlox: "Optimism, Ensign! How bad could it be?"

[I am Surak]

Archer: It is an unwritten Starfleet Law that the CAPTAIN has first dibs at any hot crew member!!!!!

[LeadHead]

Trip learned the hard way that nobody touches Archer's water polo ball without permission.

[Mistral]

LeadHead wrote:

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Archer: "One more crack about the moustache and you've had it!"

Trip: "But, but you don't have a mustache!"

Archer: "That's it!..."

[CorporalCaptain]

Thanks for the win, Nerys Myk!



Trip (inhaling deeply): Bringing along a tank of nitrous oxide was a great idea!

[LeadHead]

Trip: Are you sure I have to sit like this while I'm working on the Captain's chair?

T'Pol: (focusing a camera) Yes.... just like that.

(click)



Phlox: This would be easier if I could check your medical records.

Mayweather: Why can't you?

Phlox: Everywhere I call, nobody seems to remember you. Even the medic on the ship you grew up on.

Mayweather: She said something about adoption...



Archer: No, Combative Friday was rescheduled to Monday! Today is forgetful Saturday!

Trip: When's Combative Friday again?

Archer hits Trip



Trip: All set Cap'n, the next time someone sits in the chair who isn't you, they'll get an electric shock in their butt.

Archer: Time for a test. T'Pol, you have the Bridge.

[Schistocerca]

It was only after he pressed the red button did Dr Phlox realize he had gotten the MRI scanner mixed up with the torpedo tube again

Archer: Don't move...spider!!
Trip: oooh...geddit....geddit!!!

[Jonas Grumby]

Thanks for the win, Nerys Myk!



Engineer: "Commander...did...did you just caress the captain's chair seat?"
Trip: "Hey, T'Pol sits here, too...and no! No, I didn't!"

[LeadHead]

Gotta fix this one, somehow parts got deleted.

LeadHead wrote:

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Phlox: This would be easier if I could check your medical records.

Mayweather: Why can't you?

Phlox: Everywhere I call, nobody seems to remember you. Even the medic on the ship you grew up on.

Mayweather: The Medic on that ship was my mother!!

Phlox: She said something about adoption...