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Voyager There's coffee in this forum!

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Old April 11 2012, 03:49 AM   #46
Guy Gardener
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Location: In the lap of squalor I assure you.
Re: Why is there no Janeway smiley?

IntrepidMan wrote: View Post
Guy Gardener wrote: View Post
If R. Kelly taught me anything about personal responsibility, it's that when someone tries to pee on you, you take three steps back.

Try doing that with your eyes shut.

Meanwhile, I don't feel safe relying on any any hypothetical Jedi skills that may or may not exist to avoid being Tony Danza-ed.
I don't understand any of these statements. What do R. Kelly, the Jedi, and Tony Danza have to do with anything?
It's about having your eyes wide shut during a sexual experience.

Some years ago R kelly got into trouble for making a sex tape which included urinating on 14 year old girl. Look it up. Or watch the pilot to the Boondocks which is hilarious.

"Tony Danza" is a sex move where the man slaps his partner in the face with his penis and says 'Who's the Boss Bitch?! ...that's right, Tony Danza's the Boss!"

(Actually Mona was the boss, but that's neither here nor there.)

In Star Wars A new Hope. Obi Wan blindfolded his padiwan... okay I just got that. padiwan means student and obiwan means teacher. Fucking Lucas. FUCKYOULUCAS!... But Luke is in that Blinder helmet trying to block those shock blasts from a floating probe with his light sabre quite pathetically.

Luke got shocked and shot until he used the force and suddenly it was all amazing grace.

If my eyes were shut during a sexual experience, I hope that the force could protect me from either being slapped from cheek to cheek by a giant 80's sitcom themed penis or becoming doused in urine.

If I had reason to believe in any religion, that might be the underlying foundation of my faith.

Staying dry.
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