I Feel Odd...

[JohnChod]

Wow...feeling old and out of sorts and talking about approaching 30 and being in your early 30's. You're all still wet behind the ears. Just give it another 20 or so......

But, through it all, remember one thing - It's better to be over the hill than under it.

[propita]

Hubby and I don't have kids, so when we see our family's and friends' kids for the first time in years, it's a sudden reminder of time going by. We haven't really noticed because it's not constantly in our faces.

Funny thing though, we look pretty much like we did 15 yrs ago--that, except for some health issues, our bodies (at least the outsides) forgot about time, too.

[macloudt]

Nardpuncher wrote:

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I'm not sure if I really understand what you were feeling as you said yourself it was hard to describe, but I do know that our minds can start to act strange if you stay up really late, and it's not from being tired. You just start getting a weird meditative state that may be conducive to strange indescribable feelings.

I was thinking this as well. I've had insomnia all my life and my mind can take me to some pretty strange places early in the morning. I can remember lying awake when I was 8 or 9 with a strange feeling in my stomach and wondering why I was here and what my purpose was. Pretty heavy stuff for a kid!

Keep in mind that several of those people with families and careers are unhappy, despite supposedly "living the dream". Time does tend to go faster when you're older (I can't wrap my head around the fact that I'm 42), but you're still pretty young and will have opportunities that some of your Facebook friends may never have. I don't know your full circumstances, but Jenee's suggestion of a change of scenery may be beneficial in terms of helping you to move on. Strength.

[scotpens]

Jenee wrote:

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. . . I was 26 years old and working in fast food. My entire life was ... a game. I had done nothing.

I suddenly felt - really felt that expression "life is passing me by". And it was, everyone else was getting on the train of life, getting jobs, getting married, having kids. And here I was just standing there on the side of the tracks.

For everyone in a similar situation, this'll cheer you up:

[J. Allen]

Thanks for the perspectives, everyone. I guess it just felt very weird more than anything. It's likely that it was just a really strong case of regret/nostalgia, I just really didn't like the feeling, and in my tired state, just couldn't handle it like I normally could.

[Mr Awe]

^^ I just hope you don't really mean "ignore it" when you say "handle it".

Mr Awe

All I ever wanted from the time I graduated was the things I mentioned in my "What Do You Want?" thread...Financial Security(Career), A House Of My Own, Get Married & Have Children and everyone I knew from high school and family members my age...all of this came to them with ease over the past 14 years and has eluded me...if I hit 35 and I am still where I am now and not on the way to obtaining what I desire...I am done...I can't see living like this any more.

[Kestra]

You've got to move past this, J. You're not where you want to be in life, and other people seemingly are. And the time has gone by way faster than you ever expected.

But you're still young. I think when we start getting up around thirty we think omg, I'm getting old, life is passing me by, I haven't accomplished what I thought I would. But really there's plenty of time to make more out of life.

I feel like an idiot sometimes because I'm going back for a bachelors at 27, surrounded by skinny little girls wearing the latest fashions, going to college events, dating, with their futures wide open before them. But fuck that. The nice thing about getting older is that you know what you want and you're more capable of obtaining it.

You've got to get a more positive attitude, man. No one's life goes exactly as planned, but we take those detours and they become a part of us. You have so much time ahead of you, but it's only worth something if you actually do something with it.

[J. Allen]

Kestra wrote:

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You've got to move past this, J. You're not where you want to be in life, and other people seemingly are. And the time has gone by way faster than you ever expected.

I try to keep heart and remember the line from the Desiderata that says, "If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. "

Sometimes in practice it becomes difficult.

But you're still young. I think when we start getting up around thirty we think omg, I'm getting old, life is passing me by, I haven't accomplished what I thought I would. But really there's plenty of time to make more out of life.

Yeah, that's exactly how I feel about it.

I feel like an idiot sometimes because I'm going back for a bachelors at 27, surrounded by skinny little girls wearing the latest fashions, going to college events, dating, with their futures wide open before them. But fuck that. The nice thing about getting older is that you know what you want and you're more capable of obtaining it.

You've got to get a more positive attitude, man. No one's life goes exactly as planned, but we take those detours and they become a part of us. You have so much time ahead of you, but it's only worth something if you actually do something with it.

I agree with what you're saying and I know you're right (you should be used to me saying this ). I think my stint of unemployment (going on 27 months now) has really brought my optimism down to a dull finish. A job would give me something to shoot for, a way back to moving forward instead of standing still.

I'd much rather be the optimist I was than the pessimist that sits at the edge of my awareness.

[Warp Coil]

It's been 12 years since I graduated high school. It's sometimes difficult for me to fathom how that much time could have possibly passed. I still have very fond memories of my senior year of high school and my freshman year of college. Those were the "good times" that I think about every once in a while. I had a really nice circle of friends, few cares in the world, and a lot of fun. Every once in a while, I yearn to return to those days. To have all of those people around me once again. The good news is that I am still friends with many of those people, though we are now more spread out and may not see one another that often. But we've all grown up. We've got jobs and responsibilities and the "real world". Some have started families. All I want is to get everyone together again and just hang out and have a good time, but that'll never happen because of conflicting schedules, busy lives or geographical barriers. It sucks but it's just the way it is.

[Mr Awe]

Sarek of Vulcan wrote:

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I try to keep heart and remember the line from the Desiderata that says, "If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. "

Sometimes in practice it becomes difficult.

That's not the only thing to focus on. Also note that time IS rapidly passing by, faster than you expect. Make changes now that you want. Making changes later in life, while possible, only seems to get harder and harder.

The more important parts to focus on are your goals and the time available.

Yeah, that's exactly how I feel about it.

One day there won't be plenty of time. I suggest you start making changes that you want now.

Mr Awe

[Mr Awe]

Kestra wrote:

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I feel like an idiot sometimes because I'm going back for a bachelors at 27, surrounded by skinny little girls wearing the latest fashions, going to college events, dating, with their futures wide open before them. But fuck that. The nice thing about getting older is that you know what you want and you're more capable of obtaining it.

Seriously, great attitude Kestra! I think that is perfect and kudos to you! There's nothing more powerful than a person who knows what they want and how they can get it. The great thing is that you've already positioned yourself for this change, you're doing it. Much better than sitting around moping about it while time goes by.

Wow, you're inspiring me to want to go back college, skinny girls and all, even though I don't need another degree!

Mr Awe

^
Yeah I would go to college for some skinny girls!

[J. Allen]

After getting some sleep, I do feel a bit better today. I put on a little Oasis - "What's the Story, Morning Glory?" and felt better, too. I wish I could control some of these plummets in my mood. I do work to maintain a positive attitude, but sometimes it all just crumbles away, and then I feel terrible.

[Kommander]

it might be the year in itself. 2010. Anyone born in the mid-80s or earlier has spent a good amount of their life thinking of the year 2000 as the moment when the future gets started. Here it is, ten years after the "beginning" of the "future." The future is in the past, but it feels like the present. It can be disorienting.