DS9 Caption Contest #2: Fathers Day

[LeadHead]

First off, I'd like to thank everyone for Participating in Last Weeks Caption Contest, lots of great entries, but now it is time to end the suspense and Name our winners!


For Proving that nature is a powerful force, our winner is...

The Laughing Vulcan wrote:

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Sisko: "What's with all the owls in the rafters?"
O'Brien: "Vermin. See there were rats, but the Cardies released voles to eat the rats, but then they needed something to get rid of the voles, so owls."
Sisko: "How'd they plan to get rid of the owls?"
O'Brien: "Funny thing, they did try Cardassian hawks, but Gul Edren, Dukat's predecessor, got his eyes clawed out, so they figured the owls were Ok."

For Proving that Worf has great aim no matter what he's throwing, our winner is...

AdmiralGarak wrote:

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Worf: "Bullseye!"
O'Brien: "That's great Worf, but you're supposed to use the darts."
Bashir: "Sigh... It's going to take weeks to pry Gul Dukat's head out of that wall."

For reminding us we need to get our Mint Chocolate cookies before it's too late our winner is:

Mistral wrote:

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Thank you, but I don't like Girl Scout cookies.

And for the Photoshop award, we have creativity, and it's just plain cool, our winner is:

alte wrote:

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And a Special Award for Starting a Good Amount of Speculation, our winner is:

Rush Limborg wrote:

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Ezri: Hi, Mr. Sisko--I'm with the Census!

Congratulations to our Winners!

Moving on now to the next round, here we go in honor of us all forgetting to call or send a card to our fathers because we were busy watching the US Open, the World Cup or a Baseball Game...

[LeadHead]

Sisko: So let me get this straight, you're taking the Blue-Ray Player, the Xbox, the flatscreen and the surround sound. What does that leave me with?

Jake: VHS and bunny ears on the small TV, see ya!



O'Brien always had to breathe away from any member of his family as his morning breath was the worst in Starfleet history.



Worf: When I said, 'cut the cheese' I didn't mean literally.

[Nerys Myk]

SISKO: See ya, kid. Remember, if you get into trouble, I don't know you.



O'BRIEN: For the last time, Daddy wasn't hurting Mommy!



WOF: Just kill me before they do another Alexander story.

[Kirby]

Worf: Eat your soup with a knife... like a real warrior!

[AdmiralGarak]

Sisko: "Okay, I've packed all of your Season 7 scripts into that suitcase, Jake-o. Whatever you do, don't leave it at grandpa's house. I wouldn't want you standing around uselessly with no episodes of your own for an entire season."



Molly: "Mommy, what's a 'limp shillelagh'?"
Keiko: "Ask daddy, sweetheart."


Worf: "All of the speculation in this forum about my penis has made me realize how phallic these daggers with the extendable claws are."
Alexander: "What? I'm supposed to have extendable claws down there!?"
Worf: "Sigh... So very human. "

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Fangs for the win!



Sisko: "I expect you'll be back in a couple of hours."
Jake: "Give me a little more credit. I think I can last a little longer on my own than that."
Sisko: "No, I want you back here at 1700, I'm going to need a hand moving the pool table into your room."




O'Brien: "I know you want a little brother, Molly, but you don't have to watch and wait the entire nine months."
Molly: "I just want to make sure that you're doing it right."



Worf: "The Klingon rite of Dar'kthg'hangh. When a boy becomes a man, it is essential that the ritual be performed correctly and with honour."
Alexander: "Daaaad! I've been shaving for ages already!"

[Mistral]

Thanks for the win!-Mistral

The Laughing Vulcan wrote:

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Jake: "And I don't need anything! Except this case. And maybe this laptop. And this plant, here."

[Rush Limborg]

LeadHead wrote:

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And a Special Award for Starting a Good Amount of Speculation, our winner is:

Thanks!

Now...let's try this out....



Sisko: You sure look like a man on a mission!

Jake: DAD--I'm packing my press set--Camcorder, mike--everything! I just got the BEST story ready. I have an interview--and I CAN'T BE LATE!!!

Sisko: Who's the unlucky celebrity this time?

Jake: Paris Hilton.



(Molly runs in)

O'Brien: Uh, Molly? I thought we said not to come i--

Molly: Daddy...you already know who Mommy's daddy is!

O'Brien: Uh...yes?

Molly: So why ask her, silly?

Keiko: You know...she's gotta point.

O'Brien: Oh, knock it off....



Worf: This is a mighty weapon, with many uses, my son. use it wisely.

Alexander: (taking the knife) I will, father. And the first blood it shall see...will be of those Trekkies who dared to call me "annoying" and "useless"! At last...they shall pay for their insolense!

Worf: (aside) I'm going to regret giving him that....

[The Laughing Vulcan]

Alexander: "Ah, the ritual dagger of K'Lak'breth"
Worf: "No, it's..."
Alexander: "The honourable stilletto of M'kRagh?"
Worf: "Actually..."
Alexander: "Oh... it must be the tempered blade of Gal'kal'brak'thath. The fourth moon of Karthag is rising and it's almost time for the tribble bloodletting ritual..."
Worf: "If you'd..."
Alexander: "I give up, I'm all out of rituals and honourables..."
Worf: "It's a can opener you nitwit. I heard you were going camping..."

[LeadHead]

Alexander: This Dagger is your Fathers Day gift.

Worf: I can't accept this.

Alexander: Why?

Worf: It's the same Dagger you got me last year.

Alexander: Whoops.

[jep]

Cowen: "You DARE disturb the leader of the Genii during lovemaking???"

Molly: "The Genii?"

O'Brien: "Oh.... uh sorry.... wrong series."

Keiko: "And don't worry, you didn't interrupt much."

Molly: "Oh snap!"



.

[Rat Boy]

Sisko: "At last! I'm so looking forward to being an empty-nester."

*Kasidy runs in*

Kasidy: "I'm pregnant!"

Sisko: "Damn."



O'Brien: "We were just...wrestling. Yeah, that's it."



Worf: "Look, you're a Klingon, not an android. You can't do the knife trick no matter how hard you try. We're just lucky they can reattach Leskit's fingers."

Alexander: "And Captain Klaag's arm?"

Worf: "Lost cause."

[LeadHead]

Worf: I'm so proud of you going from being born to late teens in about 10 years.

[Mistral]

LeadHead wrote:

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Worf: "Enjoy your Klingon Blood Pie. It's made of real, live targ."

Alexander: "Don't you mean from real, live targ?"

Worf: "I know what I said. Here, you'll need this knife..."

[LeadHead]

Sisko: Don't you think you're overpacking? We'll only be gone for 36 hours.