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Old March 28 2009, 09:49 PM   #61
Praetor
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

Well, I wanted to be sure. And now you have another one to chew on.
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Old March 28 2009, 09:53 PM   #62
kitsune
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

Praetor wrote: View Post
Finally Starfleet had enough.
had had enough. (need two had's here)

Praetor wrote: View Post
As quickly as they had sang
had sung

Praetor wrote: View Post
The name 'Eugene's Limit' would come to be the standard description for his unbreakable inifinite velocity barrier.
It's not really a barrier if there's nothing on the other side of it.

Praetor wrote: View Post
Excelsior also received a new, state of the art bridge module
state-of-the-art

Praetor wrote: View Post
First, she retained the awkward sublight maneuverability even at full impulse that had plagued her earlier trials.
...which had plagued...

Praetor wrote: View Post
and ordered the next three to follow tentative on the first three's performance.
replace tentative with contingent

Praetor wrote: View Post
4000th post. Congratulate me, I'm a Rear Admiral now.
Wow, you're prolific!
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Old March 29 2009, 02:01 AM   #63
Praetor
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

kitsune wrote: View Post
Praetor wrote: View Post
4000th post. Congratulate me, I'm a Rear Admiral now.
Wow, you're prolific!
Eh, not when you consider it's taken just about five years.

I couldn't think of a word I liked more than 'limit' so I used it twice. Try this:
Chapter Six - Failure and Success

By the beginning of 2287, Excelsior had been fitted with three separate pairs of transwarp nacelles and two different transwarp cores. None of them managed to propel the ship into infinite velocity. Starfleet engineers began to believe that the problem laid in the dilithium used in the transwarp core, which began to disintegrate at higher warp frequencies. On each test run, the ship had reached speeds in excess of warp nine on the new warp scale, nearly tearing herself apart on several occasions. ( Indeed, this was another separate problem – engineers began to doubt whether the ship would actually be able to maintain infinite velocity, if it was actually ever achieved, without destroying itself.) The engine core repeatedly began to overload and was shut down, repeatedly throwing the ship out of warp and requiring days of repairs. Each time the transwarp core could not be powered high enough to propel the ship beyond the transwarp barrier. Fortunately, there were no more core breaches. However, infinite velocity still remained beyond reach even through dozens of more flights. Captain Styles was completely embarrassed, and Doctor Wesley was at wits’ end. Both quietly admitted the same fear: Starfleet had engineered a disaster. Finally Starfleet had had enough.

To their embarrassment, Starfleet Command was forced to officially announce the failure of the Transwarp Development Project. The press had a field day. As quickly as they had sung the praises of the glorious new wonder ship, they had also torn apart its failures, suggesting incompetence at Starfleet was to blame for the project’s failure. The Federation Council was incensed both at the public response and at the waste of resources that had been poured into the project. It was clear that someone was going to take the fall for the project’s lack of success. Excelsior’s crew was reassigned. Though he was ultimately faultless, Captain Styles’s career was broken, and though he would continue service for the next two decades, he would never be offered command of a starship again. Doctor Tokogawa's career suffered little damage from the fiasco, as he had engineered many great successes before Excelsior, and would continue to do so for many years. The remainder of Doctor Wesley's career would be a quiet one. His lasting legacy would be the ultimate adaptation of his modified warp scale throughout the Federation. The name 'Eugene's Limit' would come to be the standard description for his unbreakable inifinite velocity limit.

The Excelsior herself was another issue entirely. Starfleet had halted the construction of the next two Excelsior class ships, the first of which was well into the framing stage, and the second only into initial parts production, and Excelsior sat powered down in dock as the authorities at Starfleet Command debated what was to be done with her. Over the six months of limbo, Starfleet allowed some of her fittings to be stripped for use on other starships under construction or refit. Excelsior lay at Pier Three a broken, hollow vessel, the blackened echo of what might have been and a reminder of what was not. Even in defeat, Excelsior quickly became the principal source of dispute again. Many in Starfleet wanted to dismantle Excelsior, recycle her remaining components, and try to forget about this embarrassing chapter of their history while pursuing a new, more conventional replacement for the Constitution class. However, another part of Starfleet Command, saw this plan as wasteful and still wanted to make the Excelsior class a reality. They pointed out that while Excelsior had failed to achieve infinite velocity, the speeds she had achieved were nonetheless impressive. This movement managed to convince Admiral Cartwright to save Excelsior. The Excelsior had been granted a second chance.

Therefore, by the end of 2287, Excelsior was again crawling with work crews beginning the task of refitting her with a standard warp drive and completing her fitting out. The work to build a new warp drive large enough to accommodate such a big ship and then install it into an already completed ship was staggering. Though publicly Starfleet wholly supported the effort, in private the brass was still uneasy and skeptical of the design’s viability, and planned to scrap the refit if any problems arose. Fortunately for Excelsior, they didn’t. Remaining equipment designed specifically for the transwarp drive was stripped and a new warp core and nacelles were constructed, again under the supervision of Dr. Tokogawa. Construction of a 'conventional' warp drive on this scale was almost unprecedented. Fortunately, the engineers who had worked to create transwarp had learned many things from their failed efforts and made revolutionary discoveries which went into the production of the warp drives of Excelsior and all subsequent vessels. Excelsior also received a new, state-of-the-art bridge module, complete with her original dedication plaque.

In early January 2289, Excelsior was again launched from Dry Dock Seven, this time under power of standard warp propulsion and with far greater caution and apprehension. Under the guidance of her new flight test crew, Excelsior began the second systems review and shakedown of her lifetime. All of Excelsior’s systems performed to full Level Four Review satisfaction this time, surprising and relieving both Starfleet Command and the staff at San Francisco Yards. However, Excelsior became notorious for several unforeseen quirks that would become characteristic of this next phase of her life. First, she retained the awkward sublight maneuverability even at full impulse which had plagued her earlier trials. Her test captain commented that Excelsior “showed her size.” Additionally, at warp she seemed to be too powerful for her own good, continuing to threaten to tear herself apart under full power of her engines at speeds of warp nine (MCU) and above, developing a serious vibration problem evocative of those experienced by the old Constitution class. Nonetheless, Starfleet authorized the Excelsior for active duty as NCC-2000. Starfleet was so pleased with Excelsior’s shakedown results that it resumed construction on the two new Excelsiors that were already underway, and ordered the next three to follow contingent on the first three's performance. The Transwarp Development Project had proven a failure, yes, but the Excelsior Class Project was now a monumental success whose historic legacy was just beginning. She was ready for her first mission. Now all she needed was a crew.

Although the appointment of most of her senior staff was a rather quick matter, especially careful thought was put into the selection of Excelsior's new commanding officer. Excelsior was going to be at the forefront of executing Starfleet policy, so her Captain not only needed to be a skilled leader, but also a skilled diplomat. A number of prominent Starfleet Captains and Commanders shied away from the assignment for fear it would break their careers as it had Styles's. Starfleet soon found their perfect candidate in the form of Commander Hikaru Sulu. A veteran of Starfleet, Sulu had been one of the forerunners considered for command of Excelsior prior to the largely political appointment of Styles. Sulu was currently in service as helmsman aboard the Enterprise-A, and had long followed the Excelsior and Transwarp Development Projects with enthusiasm. When offered command of Excelsior, Sulu eagerly accepted and was granted a promotion to Captain. He also requested Lieutenant Commander Janice Rand, a friend and former Enterprise colleague, be transferred to Excelsior. She joined the bridge crew as communications officer. The Enterprise returned Sulu to Earth in early 2290, also seeing Excelsior off as she departed for her first mission. Time would tell whether Excelsior would ultimately prove worth the work and faith put in her.
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Old March 29 2009, 07:11 PM   #64
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

wOO+!
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Old March 29 2009, 09:53 PM   #65
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

Praetor wrote: View Post
None of them managed to propel the ship into infinite velocity.
intoto

At infinite velocity, how would the navigational deflector and sensors work? They would have to be infinitely fast as well.

Praetor wrote: View Post
( Indeed, this was another separate problem
You have an extra space after the parenthesis.

Praetor wrote: View Post
standard description for his unbreakable inifinite velocity limit.
unbreakableunreachable

Praetor wrote: View Post
another part of Starfleet Command, saw this plan
remove the comma

Praetor wrote: View Post
completing her fitting out
fitting-out (or outfitting)

Praetor wrote: View Post
The work to build a new warp drive large enough to accommodate such a big ship and then install it into an already completed ship was staggering.
was staggeringrequired a great deal of ingenuity

Praetor wrote: View Post
Fortunately for Excelsior, they didn’t.
they didn'tnone did (because they implies the Starfleet brass, but you mean no problems arose)

Praetor wrote: View Post
drive on this scale was almost unprecedented
remove almost. Either it was unprecedented, or it was not.

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made revolutionary discoveries
discoveriestechnological breakthroughs (or innovations)
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Old March 30 2009, 03:48 AM   #66
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

Thanks once more, kitsune!
kitsune wrote: View Post
At infinite velocity, how would the navigational deflector and sensors work? They would have to be infinitely fast as well.
Well, like I explained (although perhaps not clearly enough - but that's okay because I can explain it more completely in the technical part) that it's not literal infinite velocity - technically the ship briefly enters another 'transcendent' dimension, which it would then exit at a predesignated location. It's not literally everywhere at once, but in the state it briefly exists, it sort of is. In other words, it was conceived as a jump drive.

But technically they wouldn't need the deflector or sensors in the 'infinite' state. (In VGR's 'Threshold' the Shuttlecraft Cochrane's sensors were able to record more information than they had space in the databanks for. If Excelsior had actually managed the same feat, it would have probably happened to them too.) The deflector is only needed for 'conventional' warp travel, which explains what the line in TSFS 'all speeds available through transwarp drive' meant.

Once more, with feeling:
Chapter Six - Failure and Success

By the beginning of 2287, Excelsior had been fitted with three separate pairs of transwarp nacelles and two different transwarp cores. None of them managed to propel the ship to infinite velocity. Starfleet engineers began to believe that the problem laid in the dilithium used in the transwarp core, which began to disintegrate at higher warp frequencies. On each test run, the ship had reached speeds in excess of warp nine on the new warp scale, nearly tearing herself apart on several occasions. (Indeed, this was another separate problem – engineers began to doubt whether the ship would actually be able to maintain infinite velocity, if it was actually ever achieved, without destroying itself.) The engine core repeatedly began to overload and was shut down, repeatedly throwing the ship out of warp and requiring days of repairs. Each time the transwarp core could not be powered high enough to propel the ship beyond the transwarp barrier. Fortunately, there were no more core breaches. However, infinite velocity still remained beyond reach even through dozens of more flights. Captain Styles was completely embarrassed, and Doctor Wesley was at wits’ end. Both quietly admitted the same fear: Starfleet had engineered a disaster. Finally Starfleet had had enough.

To their embarrassment, Starfleet Command was forced to officially announce the failure of the Transwarp Development Project. The press had a field day. As quickly as they had sung the praises of the glorious new wonder ship, they had also torn apart its failures, suggesting incompetence at Starfleet was to blame for the project’s failure. The Federation Council was incensed both at the public response and at the waste of resources that had been poured into the project. It was clear that someone was going to take the fall for the project’s lack of success. Excelsior’s crew was reassigned. Though he was ultimately faultless, Captain Styles’s career was broken, and though he would continue service for the next two decades, he would never be offered command of a starship again. Doctor Tokogawa's career suffered little damage from the fiasco, as he had engineered many great successes before Excelsior, and would continue to do so for many years. The remainder of Doctor Wesley's career would be a quiet one. His lasting legacy would be the ultimate adaptation of his modified warp scale throughout the Federation. The name 'Eugene's Limit' would come to be the standard description for his unreachable inifinite velocity limit.

The Excelsior herself was another issue entirely. Starfleet had halted the construction of the next two Excelsior class ships, the first of which was well into the framing stage, and the second only into initial parts production, and Excelsior sat powered down in dock as the authorities at Starfleet Command debated what was to be done with her. Over the six months of limbo, Starfleet allowed some of her fittings to be stripped for use on other starships under construction or refit. Excelsior lay at Pier Three a broken, hollow vessel, the blackened echo of what might have been and a reminder of what was not. Even in defeat, Excelsior quickly became the principal source of dispute again. Many in Starfleet wanted to dismantle Excelsior, recycle her remaining components, and try to forget about this embarrassing chapter of their history while pursuing a new, more conventional replacement for the Constitution class. However, another part of Starfleet Command saw this plan as wasteful and still wanted to make the Excelsior class a reality. They pointed out that while Excelsior had failed to achieve infinite velocity, the speeds she had achieved were nonetheless impressive. This movement managed to convince Admiral Cartwright to save Excelsior. The Excelsior had been granted a second chance.

Therefore, by the end of 2287, Excelsior was again crawling with work crews beginning the task of refitting her with a standard warp drive and completing her fitting-out. The work to build a new warp drive large enough to accommodate such a big ship and then install it into an already completed ship required a great deal of ingenuity. Though publicly Starfleet wholly supported the effort, in private the brass was still uneasy and skeptical of the design’s viability, and planned to scrap the refit if any problems arose. Fortunately for Excelsior, none did. Remaining equipment designed specifically for the transwarp drive was stripped and a new warp core and nacelles were constructed, again under the supervision of Dr. Tokogawa. Construction of a 'conventional' warp drive on this scale was unprecedented. Fortunately, the engineers who had worked to create transwarp had learned many things from their failed efforts and made revolutionary technological breakthroughs which went into the production of the warp drives of Excelsior and all subsequent vessels. Excelsior also received a new, state-of-the-art bridge module, complete with her original dedication plaque.

In early January 2289, Excelsior was again launched from Dry Dock Seven, this time under power of standard warp propulsion and with far greater caution and apprehension. Under the guidance of her new flight test crew, Excelsior began the second systems review and shakedown of her lifetime. All of Excelsior’s systems performed to full Level Four Review satisfaction this time, surprising and relieving both Starfleet Command and the staff at San Francisco Yards. However, Excelsior became notorious for several unforeseen quirks that would become characteristic of this next phase of her life. First, she retained the awkward sublight maneuverability even at full impulse which had plagued her earlier trials. Her test captain commented that Excelsior “showed her size.” Additionally, at warp she seemed to be too powerful for her own good, continuing to threaten to tear herself apart under full power of her engines at speeds of warp nine (MCU) and above, developing a serious vibration problem evocative of those experienced by the old Constitution class. Nonetheless, Starfleet authorized the Excelsior for active duty as NCC-2000. Starfleet was so pleased with Excelsior’s shakedown results that it resumed construction on the two new Excelsiors that were already underway, and ordered the next three to follow contingent on the first three's performance. The Transwarp Development Project had proven a failure, yes, but the Excelsior Class Project was now a monumental success whose historic legacy was just beginning. She was ready for her first mission. Now all she needed was a crew.

Although the appointment of most of her senior staff was a rather quick matter, especially careful thought was put into the selection of Excelsior's new commanding officer. Excelsior was going to be at the forefront of executing Starfleet policy, so her Captain not only needed to be a skilled leader, but also a skilled diplomat. A number of prominent Starfleet Captains and Commanders shied away from the assignment for fear it would break their careers as it had Styles's. Starfleet soon found their perfect candidate in the form of Commander Hikaru Sulu. A veteran of Starfleet, Sulu had been one of the forerunners considered for command of Excelsior prior to the largely political appointment of Styles. Sulu was currently in service as helmsman aboard the Enterprise-A, and had long followed the Excelsior and Transwarp Development Projects with enthusiasm. When offered command of Excelsior, Sulu eagerly accepted and was granted a promotion to Captain. He also requested Lieutenant Commander Janice Rand, a friend and former Enterprise colleague, be transferred to Excelsior. She joined the bridge crew as communications officer. The Enterprise returned Sulu to Earth in early 2290, also seeing Excelsior off as she departed for her first mission. Time would tell whether Excelsior would ultimately prove worth the work and faith put in her.
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Old March 30 2009, 04:07 AM   #67
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

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Thanks once more, kitsune!
It's looking good.
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Old March 31 2009, 12:32 AM   #68
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

Are we putting aside Sulu's running story about him and the Excelsior as depicted in the filmed-but-dropped scene in STII, and followup in the novels? I quite liked the notion of him already being the Captain-in-waiting in II, being proud of saying she had transwarp drive in III, and (in the novels) being denied his official promotion because of the Genesis incident and then accepting a temporary reduction in rank while they ironed out the transwarp problems in IV and V... Or are you considering your prose as part of the Genesis coverup?

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Old March 31 2009, 12:59 AM   #69
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

I really love where this project is going with the background on the Excelsior but it would also be great to see more artwork depicting the Excelsior NX-2000 vs. the Excelsior NCC-2000.
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Old March 31 2009, 06:31 PM   #70
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

Sarvek wrote: View Post
I really love where this project is going with the background on the Excelsior but it would also be great to see more artwork depicting the Excelsior NX-2000 vs. the Excelsior NCC-2000.
Don't worry, there will be. I just have too much real world stuff going on at the moment to dedicate myself to the drawing work at the moment, but I promise, stay tuned, they're coming.

Mark_Nguyen wrote: View Post
Are we putting aside Sulu's running story about him and the Excelsior as depicted in the filmed-but-dropped scene in STII, and followup in the novels? I quite liked the notion of him already being the Captain-in-waiting in II, being proud of saying she had transwarp drive in III, and (in the novels) being denied his official promotion because of the Genesis incident and then accepting a temporary reduction in rank while they ironed out the transwarp problems in IV and V... Or are you considering your prose as part of the Genesis coverup?
A good, good question, actually.

I was, at one point, considering including it, but thought since it was essentially dropped from the continuity that I would do the same. However, your explanation seems somewhat plausible and I'm willing to reconsider.

I see two possibilities:
1) Styles was just a test captain all along, and Sulu was intended to be the first real captain but TSFS/Genesis ruined that
2) Sulu was intended to take command in TWOK but when the Khan/Genesis issue pushed the timetable, they pushed Sulu to the sideline to stick to their timetable, with the assignment then being given to Styles

What does everyone else think?
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Old March 31 2009, 06:55 PM   #71
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

I like the notion that Sulu was promised Excelsior in TWOK. After more than a decade driving Kirk around and effectively being the second officer, the guy deserves it.

So yes, how about him being slated to take over Excelsior for her shakedown cruise, but the whole Genesis thing pushing that back. Styles was either the officer in charge of her construction, or more likely the guy they put in charge after Sulu was held up. Then, with the transwarp failures pushing everything back indefinitely, the recently-exonerated Sulu asks to be kept at his rank and position as helmsman so he can stay on the new Enterprise's shakedown. The whole God thing over with and the Excelsior project on the move again with a standard warp drive, Sulu happily slips into the white turtleneck for the job he was made for. Cue credits.

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Old April 2 2009, 12:26 AM   #72
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

The only trouble is Sulu's line at the end of Voyage Home: "I'm counting on Excelsior!" I imagine his reaction would have been different if he was already designated captain-in-waiting, but Kirk came along and stole his ship. It would have been a toys out of pram reaction of Takei-esque proportions.

Great read Praetor. It's a good narrative that fits together lots of bits of Trek lore, but is mercifully free of techno-jargon. I love the Morrow sub-plot, and the idea that he champions Excelsior, only for Kirk and Scotty to finish him off.

So is the redressed TNG engine room on the Enterprise-A an example of the new faster warp drive developed from the Excelsior?
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Old April 2 2009, 12:51 AM   #73
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

Tomalak wrote: View Post
The only trouble is Sulu's line at the end of Voyage Home: "I'm counting on Excelsior!" I imagine his reaction would have been different if he was already designated captain-in-waiting, but Kirk came along and stole his ship. It would have been a toys out of pram reaction of Takei-esque proportions.
Yeah... that's a good point. Perhaps I will leave it unaddressed?

Great read Praetor. It's a good narrative that fits together lots of bits of Trek lore, but is mercifully free of techno-jargon. I love the Morrow sub-plot, and the idea that he champions Excelsior, only for Kirk and Scotty to finish him off.
Why, thank you. I made a conscious decision to have a history part and a technical part, because there were specific things I wanted to address. The technical part isn't as far along, but is coming. And I'm glad you noticed the Morrow sub-plot. Something about him always made me hate that guy, and it just so happened that making him a jerk helped fit together a few seeming inconsistencies here and there.

So is the redressed TNG engine room on the Enterprise-A an example of the new faster warp drive developed from the Excelsior?
Correctamundo! In fact, that's part of why the Enterprise-A is specifically named to be a newer kitbash build to test Excelsior-derived tech (as I think most of the other refits in service at the time probably had the TMP-TSFS refit setup).

Well, let's commence with the next chapter shall we?
Chapter Seven - Beginnings

The Excelsior departed in mid-February of 2290 for Federation space near the Klingon Neutral Zone on a mission that would prove a surprising test of resolve for all involved. The Klingon Empire had been showing signs of instability in recent years, and Starfleet feared any civil war would draw in the Federation. Therefore, Starfleet, began a fleet-wide program "cataloging gaseous planetary anomalies in Beta Quadrant." While a bona fide scientific mission, the program was also a cover, an excuse for an increased presence of Federation starships in that region, including Excelsior and Enterprise. During her three-year "cataloging" mission, Excelsior participated in a number of side missions that remain classified to this day. Her presence in the region was instrumental, and helped prove the design's worth to the skeptics in Starfleet leadership.

In 2293, Excelsior ended her three-year deployment in Beta Quadrant. The crew finally breathed a collective sigh of relief as they were en route back to port. However, Excelsior was about to gain another entry in the history books. On Stardate 9521.6, Excelsior began to rock as she cruised at impulse. An energy wave was detected at port, and the ship was violently rocked by what was soon determined to be a subspace shock wave, emanating from the Klingon moon of Praxis. Captain Sulu sent a hail offering assistance. Excelsior soon after received a distress call from the moon, followed by a Klingon reply not to enter their space. The destruction of Praxis, the Klingons' key energy production facility, crippled the their economy, and the Klingon Chancellor Gorkon began to make peace overtures to the Federation, a proposal to effectively end seventy years of unremitting hostility which the Klingons could no longer afford. The Enterprise was sent to escort Chancellor Gorkon to a peace summit on Earth, but Chancellor Gorkon was assassinated and Captain Kirk and Doctor Leonard McCoy of Enterprise were arrested for the crime.

Captain Sulu proceeded to take his vessel on a daring (and illegal) rescue mission of his former colleagues. The incident was not recorded in the ship's log, but has since been made public record. Excelsior attempted to penetrate Klingon space through the Azure Nebula, but was soon discovered by patrols led by noted Klingon war hero Kang. The Excelsior was attacked and forced to withdraw to Federation space. Damage incurred to the ship during the incident would be blamed on an ion storm officially. Excelsior later joined Enterprise at a new peace conference at Camp Khitomer, along the Klingon border, and helped expose the conspiracy behind the assassination of Chancellor Gorkon, as well as preventing the assassination of the Federation President, at the hands of extremist forces within both the Federation and the Klingon Empire.

Some weeks later, after remaining on extended assignment near the Klingon border in the event of any further incidents, Excelsior returned to Earth to be refit for her next mission. The Enterprise-A, whose decommissioning had become inescapable, partly due to the systems integration issues that had been present from the ship's launch (blamed by most largely on the ship's leftover construction) and partly due to the retirement of several key members of her senior staff including her Captain, was already in dock. As Excelsior was alive with the measures of refit, Enterprise's final crew had emptied her to the tranquility of retirement.

Shortly before Excelsior's return to Earth, the new U.S.S. Enterprise, NCC-1701-B was commissioned in a ceremony in Earth orbit, under the command of Captain John Harriman. Her helmsman was Ensign Demora Sulu, daughter of Excelsior Captain Hikaru Sulu. Enterprise had been designed to test several experimental variants of the Excelsior design, derived from the Excelsior's and Ingram's previous flight data, designed to make her a more successful deep space exploratory ship. The enhancements, while not unsuccessful, were not widely popular, and ultimately proved rare among Excelsior class ships, making up less than twenty percent of the entire line. Captain James Kirk, Captain Montgomery Scott, and Commander Pavel Chekov were all present for the commissioning of this, the third Excelsior class starship. Excelsior herself was scheduled to be on hand for the commissioning, but was delayed. On the Enterprise's first cruise, immediately following the ship's commissioning, Captain Kirk was lost while saving the ship and a number of El-Aurian refugees from a subspace ribbon anomaly. Earth, and indeed the entire Federation, observed a day of mourning for its fallen hero.

As the Enterprise returned from her disastrous maiden voyage, it joined the newly-arrived Excelsior in Spacedock. The startling image of the Excelsior, the wounded Enterprise-B, and the decommissioned Enterprise-A sitting together in dock is considered by many to be one of the most powerful in Starfleet history. On that somber note, Excelsior's refit began. Several months later, after the completion of her refit, and as the Enterprise-B completed repairs and final fitting out, Excelsior received orders to escort the Enterprise-A, under operation of a temporary flight crew, to the Fleet Museum, where the ship was to spend the rest of her life as a living memorial. The historical irony of the Excelsior as honor escort to the vessel that was feared to be a threat to her success, where the only real threat was arrogance, is lost on few. In this symbolic act, the Excelsior class finally became the successor to the Constitution class, and held the promise of a lengthy future.
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Old April 2 2009, 09:31 AM   #74
kitsune
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

Praetor wrote: View Post
Therefore, Starfleet, began a fleet-wide program
Remove the comma after Starfleet

Praetor wrote: View Post
Her presence in the region was instrumental, and helped prove the design's worth to the skeptics in Starfleet leadership.
It seems odd to me to have instrumental at the end of a clause. I'm used to seeing the constructions instrumental to XXX or instrumental in XXX.

Praetor wrote: View Post
The Enterprise was sent to escort Chancellor Gorkon to a peace summit on Earth, but Chancellor Gorkon was assassinated
but he was assassinated,

Praetor wrote: View Post
Captain Sulu proceeded to take his vessel on a daring (and illegal) rescue mission
illegal -> unauthorized or treaty-violating

Praetor wrote: View Post
(blamed by most largely on the ship's leftover construction)
blamed primarily upon


Praetor wrote: View Post
The enhancements, while not unsuccessful, were not widely popular, and ultimately proved rare among Excelsior class ships, making up less than twenty percent of the entire line.
That figure seems very high.
I assume the secondary hull fairings added labs and cargo capacity, which may not have been that useful, but the more powerful impulse engines should have been more popular given the Excelsior's disadvantage in maneuverability relative to the Constitution class.
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Old April 2 2009, 06:51 PM   #75
Nimitz CO
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Re: Excelsior Technical Manual - Revived!

Praetor, this is a great and well thought out backround for the Excelsior Class you are a really good writer. Do you have any plans to try and publish this professionally? You also have insired me to draw up a cover for your project as well as a logo for the NX-2000 and NCC-200, however, for some reason I can't post images here. If you send me a PM with your e-mail address and I'll be more than happy to send then out to you. Sorry I just noticied that I don't have a PM you can get me at starfleetemt@yahoo.com

Last edited by Nimitz CO; April 2 2009 at 06:55 PM. Reason: A Stupid Moment
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