What should Locke's....(316 SPOILERS)....have said?

Spoilers for all episodes up through 316 in this thread.





What should Locke's suicide note have said? You can give either serious or humorous answers. Here are some less than serious ideas:


Jack,
Is it me, or did Charlie look just like that guy from the movie with the talking trees?

JL
---
Jack,
If you're coming back to the Island, please stop by the grocery store on the way to pick up some supplies. The toilet paper situation is getting rather ugly.

JL
---
Jack,
The code for getting back to the Island is up up down down left right left right b a start.

JL
---
Jack,
There are only 12 Cylon models.

JL
---
Jack,
Was I alone in thinking that Desmond was going to get smacked by that pendulum?

JL
---
Jack,
You wouldn't *believe* how many weird interpersonal connections there are among the pre-crash lives of the Flight 815 survivors.

JL
---
Jack,
When the plane runs into turbulence, rather than fastening your seatbelt as instructed, you should run up and down the aisles, yelling "We're all gonna die! We're all gonna die! REPENT! REPENT!" That would be hilarious.

JL

P.S.
Oh yeah, the one person you definitely need to make sure you take back to the Island is Walt. If you go back without him, the spacetime continuum will collapse on itself, and the Earth will be destroyed. I guess I should have mentioned this earlier, lol!

 

That, combined with the revelation that Daniel Faraday is infact a Cylon, would've made my year.

 

That's hilarious for reasons I don't fully understand.

 

^ I didn't think of it that way but it kinda is. It was supposed to be for others to make their own up but I guess Locke was at a loss for words.

 

Jack,
Don't worry. Ben assures me this is the right thing to do.

Oh crap, I hope he's not lying ag

 

Jack,
I am your father....



.....haha just kidding

JL

 

It reminded me of the Garfield-without-Garfield comics. Honestly, I wouldn't have been at all surprised if that's what the note had actually said on the show. Why not add in a few dozen more mysteries?

 

Jack,

I know this may seem desperate but they're out of deoderant on the island and I'm not getting within 100 miles of Sawyer again...

JL

 

Jack,

You have to come back but the Angsty Beard isn't welcome. Dead Charlie says you can bring the pills though.

JL

 

Jack,

Don't worry. I'm just spending the year dead for tax purposes.

JL

 

Jack,
Agnes Darling, if such should be we never meet again, while firing my last shot, I will gently breathe the name of my wife - Agnes - and with wishes even for my enemies I will make the plunge and try to swim to the other shore.
JL

 

This one turned out to be oddly prophetic.

 

Epic win!