Blue Warp Nacelles?

Last one for now. This scene demanded Sombrero-ization.

 

^Oooh, good choice.

 

Awesome. I was going to put a sombrero on Billie Sheep ... but alcohol was more important.

 

This is so awesome that it needs a new word...

SOMBRAWESOME!!!

 

Okay, here's the story.

Let's just say it didn't go exactly as planned.

On Friday, I got really sick (and I almost never get sick). I continued limping along at the Comic-Con for the next several days under huge amounts of medication, but I was a total wreck. Since I was wearing a sombrero, I was at least a handsome, Star Trek loving wreck.

So by Saturday night, I was dying. My other friends had little interest in the "Fringe" panel (which was the only place Abrams, Orci, and Kurtzman were going to appear at the Comic-Con), so I knew I was on my own. But since I had given my word, I had to try.

I propped myself up in a chair near the middle of the mostly-empty room and waited for the "questions from the fans" portion of the panel. My throat was so raw that I could barely speak.

Finally, they opened the room to questions, and I got in line, leaving my bag of goodies back at my seat.

I kneeled on the floor along with the others (as instructed by the Microphone Lady) and waited my turn. Unlike most of the other panels, this one was screening questions, so I knew that I was going to have to come up with a "fake" question, or I would have been shut down immediately.

I came up with a fake question that would seque perfectly into my sombrero question. I gave the fake question to Microphone Lady. She pondered it slowly, judging my self worth. I wanted to smack her, but I was too sick. Finally, she gave the nod, indicating that I had passed her arbitrary scrutiny.

Then, the moment of truth. I stood proudly and walked up to the microphone. I adjusted my sombrero for maximum effect. Microphone Lady asked me to stand very close to the microphone and speak clearly. I leaned into the microphone and my throat, dry and raw, made a squawk. Nothing came out. I cleared my throat and tried again.

Now, here is what was supposed to happen:

Cogley: "Fake question blah blah blah blah AND for those of you working on Star Trek, how do you feel about the Star Trek sombrero phenomenon that is sweeping the internet?"

Here is what actually happened:

As soon as I got the last word of my real question out, the microphone instantly went dead. I said "AND" and it was clear that the microphone was no longer on. I kept speaking anyway, hoping it was only a glitch. Microphone Lady rudely stated, "That's it. That's all you get." and rushed me along my way. I have no idea how they cut me off at that instant. It was as if they were reading my mind and knew exactly what I was going to do. I never even paused in-between questions! It was like they were psychic!

Dejected, and sick as a dog, I limped back to my seat to find... that my bag of goodies was gone! What the frak!?! I had only been gone a few minutes! There was no one seated anywhere nearby (nor was there before I asked the question). I felt like Charlie Brown who had just been given a rock. Some guy several rows back said, "Hey, security took your stuff." I thanked him and then approached the nearest Elite (poorly named, apparently) staff member. They told me that they had already taken my stuff down to lost and found. This seemed unlikely, since it had only been a few moments since I got in line.

I went down to lost and found. They said that no one had brought anything to them in days. This was not a good sign. Over the next several days, I went back and forth between Ballroom 20 (where my shit disappeared) and lost and found, to no avail. Basically, I was fucked, and my stuff was gone.

So that's my story. I give myself an 'E' for effort, and an 'F' for execution. And I got fucked in the process.

But I did ask Abrams, Orci, and Kurtzman a question while wearing a giant sombrero. And for that, I feel some semblance of pride.

 

You're still my hero, Sam.

You battled through raw-throated adversity to do glorious battle with a Microphone Harpy. Which is above and beyond the call of duty.

Gawdblessyersir.

 

Awwww, that totally sucks. But you're still my hero. A for effort and if I was around I'd give ya some chicken soup.

 

Jeebus, Sam. That sucks. Sorry about your stuff.

You'd think it was a frakking White House press conference with all the anal-retentive vetting going on.

 

Bummer, Sam. I give you full marks for giving it the old college try. Walk with your sombrero held high!

 

Awesombrero?

 

This last weekend I was at the 10,000 Lakes Music Festival (10KLF) in northern Minnesota. I've gone the last few years and attend other jam band type festivals on a regular basis. I saw something brand new this year at 10KLF, something I have never seen before:

Sombreros.

It's hard to put a count on it but maybe a dozen hippies were wearing sombreros in the hot sun. You needed a hat to keep cool in the heat, but I've never seen anybody before wearing a sombrero.

I didn't ask any of the long haired sombrero wearers why. Hippies like to dress up, anyway, but I can think of only three reasons.

1) There are a lot of hippies lurking on TrekBBS.
2) We have started something here that is turning into a much bigger movement.
3) Alien probes. We are all being affected by alien probes.

I hope somebody else has a better explanation.

Next year I plan to have a menorah in my campsite.

 

I just found some security cam footage of Cog's plight with the mic wrangler:

 

Still my hero, dude. Sorry about your stuff. That bites.

 

Today is trash pickup day in our neighborhood, and as I was leaving for work this morning, I noticed one of the houses had a large pile of trash out front.

With two sombreros on top.

Coincidence?



Well, probably, yeah...

 

Tis only a flesh wound.

 

Full marks for effort sam. I'm not sure what else to type, so I'll just leave it to Bette Midler.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lz_m92XLzhA&feature=related



I'm welling up...

 

I was actually really disappointed to tell you guys what happened. Normally, I have a knack for making these kind of things happen, and I was 100% confident that it would go exactly as I had planned.

So when it turned into a comedy of errors, I was really bummed.

I was considering not even reporting the story back here, but I figured my disaster of a story was far better than letting you guys think I never even tried. Besides, it's fun to laugh at somebody when they fuck up. So enjoy it!

And if it had just been a pure Star Trek panel, I probably would have launched right into my sombrero question, but since it was a "Fringe" panel, I figured I would have to gently push the topic in my direction. Maybe I should just have gone straight for the sombrero question. But I don't think Microphone Lady would have gone for it.

However, if I get another chance (hell, we still have a whole year, right?), I will definitely try again.

 

Cogley! You SHALL NOT PASS!



Nice try though.

 

Let that be a lesson to you. Don't drink the water!