HAHA! I have partly solved the mystery of women...

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous' started by Plecostomus, Feb 11, 2009.

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  1. Plecostomus

    Plecostomus Commodore

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    I think all women are networked together somehow. I can't explain it any other way. I made the phone-clerk at job-is-job angry today, and then I went to the post office and the postal-clerk was angry, and then I called my wife at the hospital and she was angry too.

    Suddenly it clicked. This is how they multi-task so effortlessly. The idle women process tasks for the busy ones. That explains why Jenifer gets so tired while seemingly doing nothing. "They" are using her un-assigned brain-cycles to run active processes.

    Now I'm sitting here faxing something and I just realized the fax-tones sound EXACTLY like my wife when she calls one of her co-workers for information. High-speed, shrill and full of information.

    Amazing. So by that logic the blond ones must have limited or no connectivity and the red ones must have some kind of T3-line to the Mood Swing CPU.

    Well. Now that I've figured this all out, I fully expect to meet a painful and messy demise at the hands of one of these creatures. In fact I'm sure The Collective is figuring it now and dispatching units as I type this.

    Ah well. Hope she's cute at least.
     
  2. Lindley

    Lindley Moderator with a Soul Premium Member

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    It all makes sense now!
     
  3. Canadave

    Canadave Vice Admiral Admiral

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  4. Scout101

    Scout101 Admiral Admiral

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    yeah, I thought this was well known? The Female Neural Network was what Al Gore used as the basis for the Internet...
     
  5. ShamelessMcBundy

    ShamelessMcBundy Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    It's also gonna be the basis for SkyNet.
     
  6. Scout101

    Scout101 Admiral Admiral

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    Yep, Skynet flares up into a murderous rage, but then keeps going quiet for 3 weeks or so. Programming flaw?
     
  7. ShamelessMcBundy

    ShamelessMcBundy Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    And then it demands diamonds ...
     
  8. Plecostomus

    Plecostomus Commodore

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    So it wipes out most of humanity for no apparent reason and then expects us to apologize?


    :guffaw:
     
  9. Kryton

    Kryton Admiral Admiral

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    So you're saying it's NOT a series of tubas?
     
  10. ShamelessMcBundy

    ShamelessMcBundy Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    A series of tampons, maybe ... :eek: :wtf:
     
  11. JonathonWally

    JonathonWally Admiral Admiral

    The Estrogen Mafia is on to you, run while you can.
     
  12. ShamelessMcBundy

    ShamelessMcBundy Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    That means i'm gonna have to go undercover in the Gay Mafia ...
     
  13. Crusher Disciple

    Crusher Disciple Admiral Admiral

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    You know what you did!!!!!!
     
  14. Emher

    Emher Admiral Admiral

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    Lies! There are no figuring out women! I thought I had one sort of figured out, but I was wrong, sooo wrong.
     
  15. Plecostomus

    Plecostomus Commodore

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    What?! :eek::confused:
     
  16. ShamelessMcBundy

    ShamelessMcBundy Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Here, have some chocolate. Or coffee flavored chocolate ...
     
  17. BorgMan

    BorgMan Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

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    I always have the problem: while I'm single, the women won't see your standing. When you've got a girlfriend... all of the sudden all the girls start flying around you. Yeah, it must be the Collective which shares some eh... "sensitive" information. Because if you fail, next day all the women look at you with this stupid smile on their face and keep laughing at you. If you enable the higher vocal sounds of the unit in question, next day the women around you smile as well, but it's more of a "hey man... don't we know eachother? *big smile*

    I'm not sure what I would like more: with or without the neural network...
     
  18. RJDiogenes

    RJDiogenes Idealistic Cynic and Canon Champion Premium Member

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  19. kimc

    kimc Coffee Mod Admiral

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    Let me get this straight. You pissed of three women in a row today yet they're the ones with the problem?

    Okay then...
     
  20. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

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    Could be either. Tuba or not tuba.
     
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