TOS Caption Contest #282: Love Connection

And now, we shall bring forth winners of a caption contest!




First up to the plate, we have the "Identified Flying Object" Award, going to:

Next, we have the "Difficult Diagnosis" Award, going to:

Next, we have the "Leslie Nielsen" Award, going to:

Next, we have the "Credentials Evaluation" Award, going to:

Next, we have the "Repair procedure" award, going to:

Our Photoshop award, goes to:

Many thanks to everyone who participated and congrats to our winners!

And now, our Valentines (or Singles Awareness Day)Themed contest!











Enjoy!

 

Kirkthinking) I really hope she doesn't turn out to be a homicidal maniac.



Scotty: I'm so in love with her that I finally changed the laws of physics!



Kirk: (over comm) ...And so in conclusion Mister Spock, I really think that Ms. Kalomi is very attracted to me. What do you think?



Chekov: I'm glad we could find the time to sneak away together, since the Enterprise is slowly being pulled into the atmosphere of this planet.



Natira: Wait, you're only marrying me because you're going to die?

 

"Hey Nineteen" by Steely Dan begins playing in the background.



KALOMI: Hold on while I post this selfie to Spacebook



NATIRA: A headache? That's my line!



SCOTTY: See, I told you, the cryochambers we jacked from the Botany Bay would come in handy!



CHEKOV: You know the Russian saying "Red sky at night, sailors delight"?

LANDON: Do you know the American saying "Keep it in your pants or I'll cut it off?

 

Lenore: "Alright, if you insist. I'll go change into something that smells a little less like musk."




Scotty: "Aye, she's a bonnie lass, alright! She's even consented to lettin' me put her into suspended animation to accommodate my necrophilia fetish! See? Ye never know unless ye ask!"




Spock: "Yes, Spocky-wocky wuvs his widdle ooche-woochie coochie-coo! Yes, him does... Wait! Are you broadcasting this over the ship's comm system?!!"




Landon: "Have you given any thought at all to what would happen if the captain were to come along and catch us in flagrante delicto?"
Chekov: "I'm twenty-two years old! I don't think anywhere near that far ahead!"




McCoy: "No, this is wrong! I should be trying to save my friends' lives! Not in here consorting with you!"
Natira: "When was the last time you saved your friends' lives?"
McCoy: "Oh...a few weeks ago."
Natire: "And when was the last time you had sex?"
McCoy: "...You make a very good point."

 

LANDON: Pav, are you high?
CHEKOV: If I'm high? Of course I'm high? All those Cossacks captionners vill me vrite me as a LaForge, not as a Kirk.


SPOCK: OUCH! MY NOSE!

 

Leila: Oh, Spock, what's the worst that could happen? It's not like the NSA would be eavesdropping on my iPhone...oh, wait...



Natira: Leonard, I'm sorry I almost poked your eye out. I should have told you that all women on Yonada wear steel tipped bras.

 

TFTW, LeadHead!



Natira: Don't worry, Leonard, it happens to a lot of men the first time.

 

McCoy: "I'm sorry, Natira, but I just can't. That little Orion girl on Wrigley's Pleasure Planet has ruined me for all other women."

 

Natira: The Oracle likes to watch.



Landon: Pavel, what's this "Russian inwention" that you want to introduce me to?



Lenore: I know what you're thinking, Jim. There's only one way to find out!

 

Kirk: Scotty, you old space dog. I didn't know you saved Sargon's android blueprints!

Scotty: It's a one of a kind. And you wouldna believe who helped me with the programming. It was Palamas. She volunteered. Someone named Areel convinced her it was for the good of the service.

Kirk: Wait, Areel?

 

Thanks for the win


NATIRA: Awww...Leonard, I'm so sorry...I swear I will no more try to talk with you about the fact you didn't see your daughter for a while...neither about the fact they found a cure two days after you pulled the plug on your father...

 

McCoy: "I'm sorry, Natira, I just can't. I'm afraid of entering into another relationship. My ex-wife divorced me and took everything except my bones. That's why they call me 'Bones.'"
Natira: "I thought it was short for 'sawbones.'"
McCoy: "Bah! Kids today don't have any idea what a 'sawbones' is."

 

LANDON: Pavel, who were the last yeoman and navigator to have been sent alone on a strange planet?
CHEKOV: Janice Rand and Kewin Riley, vhy are you asking that?

 

Chekov: "I ding we should make wove.
Landon: "Pavel, give me one reason why?"
Chekov: "Vcouse, you are vearing red, dis is a wanding party, and you vill be dead by morning.
Landon: "I say one reason."

 

Landon: "Looks like we're stranded on this uninhabited, Eden-like planet forever, Pavel. That being the case, I've never much liked the name 'Martha.' Call me by my middle name, 'Eve.'"
Chekov: "Alright, and you can call me by my middle name, 'Adamovitch.' 'Adam' for short."

Lieutenant Leslie wakes from his dream and starts frantically scribbling notes for his next fanfic.




McCoy: "I'm sorry, Natira, I just can't. Tonya Barrows and I are going steady."




Kirk (frowning): "Hey, is that real fur?"
Lenore: "Yes. It's dyed tribble fur."
Kirk (smiles): "Ah! Not an endangered species then!"

 

Kirk: If you need me I'll be up here with the coxswain.
Lenore: The guy who blows the whistle?
Kirk: No, that's the boatswain.
Lenore: Oh, the guy who steers the ship.
Kirk: No, that's a helmsman.
Lenore: Oh, the one who lades the cargo.
Kirk: Now that one is a stevedore.
Lenore: Not the steersman, then.
Kirk: Actually, that's the coxswain.
Lenore: Oh here we go again!
Kirk: I'll stick any complaints into my duty log.
Lenore: That's what my last captain said before he disembarked his seamen.
Coxswain: I thank you.

 

Lenore: "I'm so glad you like this dress! My father hates it! He doesn't like me wearing anything that requires double-sided sticky-tape."

 

Nimoy: Uh, did you say Bronson, uh... Ted Bronson?*

Ireland: Charles.

Nimoy: Oh, boy.

*With a nod to RAH.

 

Scotty: Look, Jim! The ship can synthesize WOMEN!

 

Fixed that for ya.