Jurassic Park 4 Coming June 14, 20...2014!!!

^ But... that's exactly what I'm suggesting. I'm keeping the goofiness to the marketing; and of course Doyle's story must be kept to its own era.

 

Oh...boy...

 

Eh, it was too much like a Godzilla movie with better special effects for me. I liked the movie until then. It didn't make me hate it i was just not excited about it.

 

It actually reminded me of a subplot of the original novel, where some young Raptors had stowed away on one of the supply ships which are only briefly mentioned in the first movie (evacuation of all non-essential personnel because of the storm).

 

TGWTG's MikeJ just posted a pretty good video takedown of JPIII. And boy, does it bring back the memories... the terrible, terrible memories...

 

I just want dinosaurs with frikkin' lasers.

 

Then you want this show.

That being said, I would love to see that show be adapted into a cinematic feature. Just for the sheer ridiculousness of it all.

 

The first JP4 had dinosaurs with fingers, so guns / lasers might have been in it...

http://www.firstshowing.net/2012/human-dinosaur-hybrids-in-abandoned-jurassic-park-4-concept-art/

 

^ For me, the wussification of the raptors totally invalidates the "eh, at least it's a solid monster movie" argument. Say what you like about The Lost World, at least its rexes knew to punish those who'd stolen its young.

 

^Agree. I liked it because it was JUST a basic monster movie, nothing more. Turn off your mind popcorn flick. Every once in a while you gotta have one of them.

 

Watch the above-linked takedown, and it'll all come back... internet video reviews: the true revenge of the nerds.

 

This use of the raptors in JP3 was just really, really bad. You'd think at the end they'd be looking at one another going, "Hey, Gary? It it me or does this guy look kind of weird?"

"Yeah, he does, but he's talking like us so I dunno..."

"His voice sounds odd, though, kind of nasally and dry or something. Like he has no flesh on his snout.

"Yeah but he seems to know the language..."

"What?! His dialect and syntax is all over the place! He just asked us where he can find a good pizza place! There's no pizza places in these parts!"

"True. Screw this guy, he's not worth our time. Take the eggs and let's get out of here."

"I'm right with you man. Hey, by the way, when did we stop having one of us lead the pray away while two others ambushed the guy from the sides?"

"I dunno, just grab the damn eggs. This guy will kill himself sooner or later the way he looks and talks."

 

^ Truly, a midichlorians-level fail.

 

I think the raptors would say something more like...

"Shit, the movie ran out of money, we aren't getting paid anymore, let's go make scrambled eggs".

 

I watched JPIII last year for the first time in years. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. I don't really think there's much between it and JPII.

 

They should just reboot it as Peter Jurassic Park