The Winners! The Specialist Awards! The Petty Squabbles Award goes to: The Where's T'Pole When You Need Her Award goes to: The Lucky Vulcans Award goes to: This fortnights selection, enjoy!
TFTW, Bry Sinclair! Archer: "I know it's a pain in the ass, but that's just the way many human males are. Look, just follow this rule of thumb: If they're looking you in the eye, you're okay. But the lower their gaze drifts, the slower and louder you have to speak."
Archer: T'Pol and I are not speaking to each other. So for the time being, all bridge commands will be given through text messages. T'Pol: OMG! Trip: Why didn't our brilliant plan to fool the Vulcan Captain work? Hoshi: Well, instead of wearing the proper division color, you just added a pip to your uniform. Instead of having me work up a fake visual of the Captain, you did the whole conversation yourself, need I go on? Trip: I am so screwed. T'Pol: I know what you are thinking, "Did she fire 5 shots or 6?" Well, in all this confusion, I have lost track. However, the power cell on this phase pistol is rated for 1,422 shots. T'Pol fires Phase Pistol.
Thanks for the win! T'Pol: *insert 22nd Century Vulcan Logic Crap* Archer: *sigh* Only if I had someone to ask for a second opinion
"...and then the gazelle stood up on his new legs and joined the herd grazing on the Serengeti tundra...." I wonder if I could nerve pinch myself? He's going to make a gazelle speech when our five year mission's over. Gotta find some way to get out of it.
The Enterprise was in trouble-and Trip knew it. With 37 female crew members aboard, they'd run completely out of chocolate.
``T'Pol, that stupid ice moon of ConnLot VI is the most worthless, hideous, horrible, unbearable ... it's on the monitor behind me, isn't it?'' ``I don't know what's wrong with me, Linus. Christmastime is here but I'm not happy.'' ``Do go ahead and speak of me as `N'Pol of Vulcan' again.'' ``Yes, T'Pol, famous people do have entourages, but you need them to be more memorable people than ... uh ... I'm gonna say `Trevor' ... here.''
Go ahead. Answer your communicator in the middle of our conversation. Archer: You had me at 'Live Long.' T'Pol: Beam me up, Scotty. Travis: Who?
T'POL: My thoughts to your thoughts.... ARCHER: Nope, not a thing. Must not be working, eh Travis? Travis? Travis?
Tucker: Look, Hoshi, between you and me we never saw Porthos go into the transporter room, OK? Archer: Look, you green-blooded, inhuman -- oh. Sorry, Travis. Mayweather ..uh? Archer: That was racist of me. I apologize. Mayweather: Thanks? I guess? Wait, why are you apologizing to me and not the Subcommander? Archer: Because you're bl- aahhh, of color. T'Pol: I'm so glad the High Command volunteered me for this mission.
Mayweather: Captain, how could you make us wear matching quilted coats into a biker bar? We are so going to get beaten up.
Archer: Have you found Reed and Trip yet? T'Pol: No, but there's still a couple of bars in the next village. Archer: ...and you, Ensign? Mayweather: Aye, sir. Full Impulse!
Archer: "Now that just the two of us are here T'Pol, there's something important I need to discuss with you." T'Pol: "Did you want Travis to hear this?" Archer: "Who?" Trip (thinking): ** It's only the two of us on the bridge, why can't I just walk over and talk to her? It always look so easy in those porn videos. **
I promise I will get a new competition up this weekend folks. They seem to go by se quickly now, kinda blink and you miss it, that I've never had time.
If no one is up for taking over the caption contest, I'm going to cut this poor thread loose and let it float away to Valhalla.