DS9 Caption Contest 83: Holosuite Fantasies

Discussion in 'Star Trek: Deep Space Nine' started by Ln X, Nov 16, 2013.

  1. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky
    First of all about the delay; I'm in university completing a masters in mathematical sciences. Also I let things slip a bit... Like two months, but I guess that was getting used to my altered circumstances.

    Anyway on with the contests!

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    In this contest we indulge in holosuite fantasies...

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    Have fun!
     
  2. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky
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    Sisko: This is your idea of fun on a holosuite?
    Bashir: Well-
    Dax: And the child? What has she got to do with this?
    Bashir: Well...
    Kira: Don't! I don't want to know the inner workings of your mind!

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    Lwaxana: One more man and this party will be complete! Computer, add character Captain Jean-Luc Picard with Robin Hood attire.

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    Garak: Doctor, this whole spy lurk would be more fun if you and Dax ceased all this... closeness.

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    Call me Benny, Brother Benny.

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    The what-you-would-look-if-you-were-human holo-program was rather popular with DS9's non-human staff.
     
  3. R. Star

    R. Star Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2012
    Location:
    Shangri-La
    Welcome back!

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    Dax: He have to imitate the steps.
    Kira: Wait, you're sure no one will ever see this?
    Sisko: We're Starfleet officers of integrity, Major.
    Bashir: (whispering to self) I'm so recording this and putting it Youtube.

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    Deanna: (on com screen) Mother... what do you think you're doing?
    Lwaxana: I would never date two men at once, Little One. Odo here's genderless. But he can be -anything- I want....

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    Garak: Excuse me, why settle for a fraudulent spy like him, when you can get the real thing over here?

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    Sisko: If you're lucky I'll shoot you and you'll die quickly. If you're unlucky I'll start punching you and you'll die slowly.


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    Producer: What? A serialized drama set on a space station with massive effects and focus on characterization? Do you know what decade this is? Next script idea.
     
  4. Nerys Myk

    Nerys Myk A Spock and a smile Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2001
    Location:
    AI Generated Madness
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    BASHIR: Come on, who isn't a fan of Small Wonder?

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    LAWAXANA: What can I say, rank has its privileges.

    ODO (under his breath): I'm not even a Federation citizen.

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    GARAK: What's she got, that I haven't got? Other than the obvious.

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    Sisko? My name is Hawk.

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    PABST: Tell Benny we're going ahead with it, but I want to change the name to Babylon 5
     
  5. Mr. Laser Beam

    Mr. Laser Beam Fleet Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Confederation of Earth
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    Halt! Hammerzeit.
     
  6. T'Girl

    T'Girl Vice Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2009
    Location:
    T'Girl
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    Sisko: "Sorry old man, but I don't think this new control panel design of your's is going to work in ops."

    Dax: "Benjamin, you're so afraid of new things."

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    Sisko: "One more move Worf and I'll blow your head off."

    Worf: "Honor insists that I inform you that you're looking at a mirror and I'M OVER HERE !!!!"


    :)
     
  7. JirinPanthosa

    JirinPanthosa Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2012
    Location:
    JirinPanthosa
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    BUCKBOKAI2332

    Re: Wadi game worth playing?

    Initially the idea of a completely virtual world made possible by a sustained transporter buffer seemed like an excellent idea. Using human beings as game pieces (Controlled by a fifth player outside the game) leaves open a world of cool opportunities to create any imaginable sort of fantasy obstacle. Unfortunately this world of creative possibility is never utilized. One obstacle simply required us to follow a young child singing a silly rhyme, and most of the others were either obvious or consisted of arbitrarily knocking somebody off. Thus while the Wadi game could have easily been a perfect 10, I must give it a mere 3 and recommend NOT trying this game until they hire someone seriously redesign the scenarios.

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    NURSE CHAPEL: Excuse me, I don't know where I am, but I think I was sucked into a time rift. Who are you and why are you acting like we have some sort of deep personal friendship?

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    BASHIR: Garak, after this is over, I'll need your help procuring a new holodeck program.
    GARAK: Ask Quark. This is gross.

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    DR NOAH: Hey, at least my plan to destroy the world is more logically sound than most government programs.

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    HERBERT ROSOFF: You saying I'm a Commie? I'll show you. Sixty years from now smarmy comedians will make fun of people like you, and they'll be considered cultural icons!
     
  8. shivkala

    shivkala Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2004
    Location:
    shivkala
    TFTW, Ln X!

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    Nana Visitor: I wonder if Babylon 5 is hiring...

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    Director: *offscreen* What is going on? None of this is in the script!

    Majel: Do you know who my husband was?

    Director: Yes...

    Majel: Maybe you want to double check your script, then?

    Director: I'll be damned, look, my script suddenly includes a scene where you have a three-way with Rene and Siddig!

    Majel: Why it's my own personal Menage-a-Troi!

    Director: Didn't they use that...

    Majel: Oh, Gene, I miss you so much!

    Director: What I meant to say was, that's funny and original Mrs. Rodenberry!

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    Garak: I take it back, my dear Doctor, you are not Ds9's LaForge. He couldn't even score with his holographic crush!

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    Who's the black commander
    That's a sex machine to all the alien chicks?
    SISKO!
    Ya damn right!

    Who is the man that would risk his pagh
    For his Bajoran brother man?
    SISKO!
    Can you dig it?

    Who's the emissary that won't cop out
    When there's Pah Wraiths all about?
    SISKO!
    Right On!

    They say this cat Sisko is a bad mother
    SHUT YOUR MOUTH!
    I'm talkin' 'bout Sisko.
    THEN WE CAN DIG IT!

    He's a complicated man
    But no one understands him but his woman
    BEN SISKO!


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    Armin: Someone want to tell Ln X that this is a Prophet vision and not a holosuite fantasy?

    Rene: Not if the captioneer wants to win these contests again.
     
  9. Leviathan

    Leviathan Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Sep 14, 2004
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    Douglas Pabst: 50% pay cut because we're not wearing the makeup? I knew this episode was a scam.
     
  10. soapp

    soapp Lieutenant Junior Grade Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2013
    Location:
    Canada
    Holosuite fantasies...

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    Dax: Seriously Bashir, all this time I thought you and O'Brien where playing some real intense holosuite program, and this is what you've been doing with all your time together.
    Kira: What the h*** Bashir! Seriously grow up, I got better things to do then play these kid games.


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    Loxanna; This holodeck program of Odo and Bashir will be great, we get to play Doctor and police officer at the same time, and the Police officer can give me the frisking on my life. :DD

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    Garak: Great this means you'll free us! Now just untie our bonds. .... ... any time now... guys... ... lets go? .... ... *gasp*

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    Sisko: Say What again! Say it what again, I dare you, I double dare you !!
    Worf: What...?
    Sisko: God Da** it Worf, I wasn't talking to you!

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    Boss: This is HBO, you need to add totally pointless nudity and sex in your plot, otherwise will never get the ratings we need.
    Writer: But the plot and characters are really in depth and interesting, it's some of the best writing I've ever read!
    Boss: So? what's your point?
     
  11. IzzyAtWarp9

    IzzyAtWarp9 Commander Red Shirt

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2013
    Location:
    221C Baker Street
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    Kira: Hmmm... interesting puzzle... I wonder how to solve it...?
    Dax: Look at the patterns... and her feet...
    Julian: Guys, seriously, do you not recognise this?! It's just hopscotch! I know you're not all human but, Commander, you should know!

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    Lwaxana: What? Oh, yes, these two. I just, umm... picked them up on the way here.
    Julian: I am here against my will. She's got a phaser in her dress.
    Lwaxana: Ha oh, you with you're jokes. Yes we will have to be going now.
    Odo and Julian together: (mouthing) Help. Me.

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    Well that just proves it.
    Bow ties are cool.

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    Sisko: If you have come with your spiritual problems, turn the Hell around and leave while you still can. Now. Is. Not. The. Time.

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    Rene: OK, here's the next story they want us to have a holosuite of.
    Armin: Really? 50 Shades of Grey?
    Siddig: Who comes up with this stuff?!
    Visitor: Come on, this is just turning into fanfiction now!
     
  12. Finn

    Finn Bad Batch of TrekBBS Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2006
    Thanks for the Win

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    Ambassador's Log. I wish Odo could morph into Jean-luc, and Bashir grow a beard and look like Riker did when we were kidnapped by the Ferengi. I'd be in Betazoid Heaven!
     
  13. bbjeg

    bbjeg Admiral Admiral

    Joined:
    May 24, 2013
    Location:
    Right here buddy.
    Thanks for the Award.

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    Producer: Star Trek on a space-station? That'll never work.
     
  14. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky
    Writer: That's it! I quit! If I have to write another planet-of-the-week story I'll go batshit crazy!
     
  15. Nebusj

    Nebusj Rear Admiral Rear Admiral

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2005
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    Welcome to Seventies Game Show Night here on the fantastic Deep Space Nine!

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    Classic romantic tangle: boy meets girl, girl meets goo, goo meets Great Link of liquid-shapeshifters out to control the galaxy...

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    Garak: Doctor! And on our anniversary?!

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    Worf: Captain, you do not have the authority to steal all our viewers' noses.

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    ``And if we play our cards right, we can be a cartoon in The New Yorker!''
     
  16. Finn

    Finn Bad Batch of TrekBBS Admiral

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2006
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    Armin: *thinking* I can't wait until the scene is over. Wearing this pair of glasses is very uncomfortable.
     
  17. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky
    The next contest will be ready tomorrow morning.
     
  18. Ln X

    Ln X Fleet Captain Fleet Captain

    Joined:
    Jul 1, 2011
    Location:
    The great gig in the sky