20 YEARS AGO TODAY: "But I'm Not Even Supposed to BE Here Today!"

He also wrote a script treatment for the aborted Superman film that would have starred Nicolas Cage so he was getting offers to do "serious" work from several different corners of the industry in the wake of the first five Askewniverse films and JG.

He's said point blank that his heart was never in doing the Green Hornet project. As he himself stated in the Clerks 2 documentary: "If I wanted to make the fat cash I'd have fucking done Green Hornet." His heart and soul are in much smaller productions and it always shows.

 

Kevin's "Green Hornet" script has been turned into a comic, which is awesome. I think the first two arcs of it are based directly from the script...I wish it would have been made, because it's one of my favourite things from him ever. Mulan Kato (Kato's daughter) is one of my current favourite comic book characters.

I also dug Kevin's "Superman Lives" script.

 

There are two things I really respect about Kevin Smith:

1) He's probably the most honest person in Hollywood. Every time he has a camera in his face or a mic in his hand, he doesn't bullshit around.

and 2) Even though he is VERY honest, he also has respect for other people. Just listen to his podcast "Hollywood Babble-on". Every time Ralph is tearing somebody apart, Kevin usually has nothing to add, and he often makes fun of how angry Ralph gets.

I admit I don't know the guy personally, but he just comes off as very easy going. Not that he's a pushover or anything, because he has talked very publicly about his negative experiences directing Linda Fiorentino, Bruce Willis, Jeremy London, but he never goes too far. He knows when to pull back the reins.

 

I hadn't heard about Jeremy London, what was his malfunction?

 

He kept forgetting his lines, like all the time.

 

I need to see Cop Out just to see how "bad" it is, and also to get another perspective on Kevin's "Evening With" rants on it. Though from them it seems like Bruce is a prima donna to work with and Kevin just wasn't nearly prepared for it, as well as working for a studio and something that wasn't his own script.

Never seen Jersey Girl and have no interest in seeing it and, yeah, a large part of that is the "Bennifer" thing.

 

What's really distracting when you go back and rewatch Mallrats is when you notice that Brandi Svenning's dad is Merle from Walking Dead. Michael Rooker already had a bit of a rep for playing dark and dangerous roles all the way back in 1995 because he had starred in Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer, but now it's hard to see him doing anything but walking around with a missing right hand and stabbing zombies through the neck and head.

Honestly, it makes Jared Svenning more of a badass.

Don't give him the chocolate pretzel, Brodie....he'll tie you to a chair and beat you.

 

And Kevin made a passing comment on the Mallrats commentary that Jeremy was often stoned while on set.

 

Yeah, during the Mallrats 10th anniversary panel discussion featuring most of the actors both Jeremy and Kevin basically came out and said that London was stoned out of his gourd on the set of the film. At one point Jeremy jokingly compares what he was smoking to whatever Jason Mewes was doing at the time.

Considering how baked he was I'd say Jeremy London's performance as T.S. is pretty damn good and convincing. He hit most of his marks and created a sympathetic character and straight man for Jason Lee's antics as Brodie.

 

What's more amazing is that Michael Rooker doesn't actually appear to age, a bit like Adam Baldwin...

 

Did it seem like they buried the hatchet then? I know Kevin didn't care for him afterwards. Which kind of sucks, I would have loved to see T.S. show up in "Strikes Back" perhaps hanging out at the Stash with Brodie.

 

Rooker hasn't seemed to age a day since Mallrats. There might be a few new facial wrinkles here and there, but if he shaved his head bald he'd probably still look just like Jared Svenning.

Svenning should make an appearance in Clerks 3. Rooker should hook up with Kevin to revive the character after almost 20 years and show what happened after he and his production assistant Roddy (Scott Mosier) finished their stint in jail following the Truth or Date fiasco. I've always wanted to see more Svenning and see him scheme against somebody else besides Brodie and T.S.

As per Kevin and Jeremy London patching things up, the anniversary discussion panel did make mention that it had been the first time Kevin had seen or done anything with him "in many years," so I don't know if they completely patched things up or he was just making the appearance as a favor for the movie's fans. It didn't make clear the state of their relationship in 2005.

 

What's amazing to me is how Willam Black seems to shed 100 pounds and lose about the same number of IQ points inside of a day or two.

 

Kevin once described the phenomenon as "The Willam of Two Worlds Theory." Same guy. Two different universes. They trade places over the course of a two-day period.

Originally Scott Mosier wanted to reprise the role in Mallrats but Ethan Suplee cracked Kevin up so much during his audition that Smith said: "It won't make any sense and will just confuse people, but I want Ethan to play Willam. We'll explain it later if anyone asks."

 

Oh, I know, I've heard the "Willam of Two Worlds" thing before it's still a bit of an oddity. (IIRC, the Mallrats Willam shows up during the "finger-cuffs" explanation/flashback in Chasing Amy.)

 

Yeah, Kevin occasionally does something because he thinks it'll be funnier and better for his movie, not because it'll make any logical sense in the context of his Askewniverse.

Willam played by two radically different-looking people who don't behave alike....a big, demonic poop monster that rises from a men's room toilet....Dame Judi Dench playing Dante Hicks in a film. It's all part of the wild and woolly world that is Kevin Smith. Thinking too much about it just gives a person a migraine.

 

This isn't on YouTube, but I found the Lost Scene here.

 

While it's just a random throwaway line in "Strikes Back" you bringing it up here made me actually imagine it. It's hilarious picturing dame Judi Dench behind the counter screaming "I'm not even supposed to be here today!"

If Judi Dench is Dante, Daniel Craig should be Randall. I would give all my appendages but my eyes to see that play out onscreen.

 

[Daniel] "You ever wonder how much a jizz mopper makes, Ma'am?

I mean Dante.

Bloody hell." [/Daniel]

 

Is that Collingwood? Walt (fanboy) and Bryan (Steve-Dave) have a great podcast and they did an episode on that place---> Makin' Hay