^ I hate to sound harsh, but I don't really care what the commentary says. Sela is clearly not to be trusted, and I see no reason at all to take her at her word. I don't even care that she was only 4 when she effectively killed her mother. The least she could do was show SOME remorse.
Although in Romulan society, being an informer might be encouraged...probably is, if Sela is any indication.
And I also stand by my statement that Sela could not have taken Donatra's place in the film. Sela would never have helped Picard and crew, and would have probably fired on and destroyed them (whereas Donatra dispatched aid). And Sela would have been an enthusiastic participant in Shinzon's plans to wipe out every Federation world.