Er.... shouldn't the Vulcan CO in Emissary have ordered all families off the ship PRIOR to the battle? Why even have families on board starships? That's cruel. what if a child just via a skirmish with Romulans, in which the ship is not badly damaged, gets PTSD or some trauma?
That aside, I doubt how a CO of a ship, faced with a massive vessel of FAR greater power, could not stave off defeat, assimilation, or capture without luck or extreme resourcefulness.